It’s a story practically as old as time itself: A staunchly liberal young woman spends her life dreaming of having her very own gay son; watching him take those first tenuous steps across the living room floor to eventually become an all-out voguing ninja; a master of the modern-day read; extremely muscular, and sexually versatile if she has any sway in the matter.
Try as she might to persuade him with Auntie Mame perpetually looping on the laptop and Porgy & Bess blasting in the living room ’til all hours, her son eventually reveals himself to be a regular heterosexual man. She’s devastated; has a hard time even looking him in the eye. Was it something she did? Didn’t do? Was there a mix up down at the hospital?
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Such is the plight of a young man who writes into Reddit with an improbable quandary.
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“My mom was a very progressive liberal,” writes Nicaraguaa.
“She desperately wanted a gay son. Eventually she made me believe i was gay and through that, i was in a gay relationship for 6 years as someone who is straight….
Eventually she made me believe i was gay. At one point i knew i wasn’t but felt like i had to keep it going. Finally i moved away.
I do not believe my mothers actions are reflective of her being a liberal. This post is in no way meant to be political.”
A few more pertinent details: At his mother’s behest, he dated another male from the ages of 12 to 18.
“She convinced me that i wanted to have sex with someone i wasn’t attracted to,” he writes. “His parents assumed i was gay. They were super nice to me and treated me like a son.”
While he had what he calls “effeminate” qualities growing up — he didn’t like sports, was “passive,” only had girls for best friends — he’s only exclusively watched straight porn throughout his life.
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Asked by fellow Reddit user LitlleCRO-, “Did you take it backstage?”, the original poster replies, “Yes.”
So… how to break it to mom that he’s straight? Or should he avoid the subject altogether?
Redditors were quick to chime in with their own two cents.
“I guess you could always say you think you might be bisexual,” says virnovus. “I can’t imagine she’d feel THAT disappointed.”
“Given that this started at a young age,” says ChemicalRascal,“I’d suggest seeking someone professional to talk about this to, if you haven’t already.”
“There’s no shame in getting help for this sort of stuff, because it can (not strictly does, but can) keep being a problem for you otherwise.”
“Seriously though,” says virnovus. “I think that once she realizes that imposing her own wishes on you isn’t really any different from how parents who DON’T want their kids to be gay is, she’d probably get over it.”
“Plus, you have the benefit of being able to tell her than you think you’re bisexual, if you want to break the news to her more gradually.”
“Parents have an incredible amount of say when it comes to their child’s personality,” says unmuscular_michael, “and in my opinion it’s tantamount to child abuse.”
“I am glad you can see this now for what it is, either fairly straightforward projection or Munchausen by Proxy.”
“A lot of people are arguing this from the LGBT perspective,” says literallylateral. “I’d like to argue this from the toxic parent perspective.”
“My mother also pushed stuff on me to unhealthy degrees, even going so far as to essentially gaslight me to convince me that I had subconsciously blocked out/altered certain memories.
Parents can really have as much or as little influence over their children as they want. And if they want a lot of influence, they give themselves the power to basically brainwash you.
It’s almost like being part of a cult from birth, and it can really, really confuse you. I’m trying to think of an analogy and I can’t, but it’s really not something that you can fully understand unless you’ve been through it, I think.”
What advice would you give this young man? Should he come clean about his sexuality? Avoid his mother altogether because she seems manipulative and toxic? Give gay porn a shot? Sound off in the comments below.
Jaxton
The mother sounds like your typical selfish, self-absorbed liberal woman.
Cy
There is nothing typical about this woman, least of all being, what you call, a self-absorbed liberal. This is something completely out of the norm for a very liberal woman, if you know liberal women. Which to me makes the story unbelievable.
PinkoOfTheGange
Oh come on who actually believes this?
Some sideways Munchhausen by proxy? Actual cases are as common as dissociative identity disorder. There probably more fictional characters with the affliction then there have been people diagnosed with it.
CaliKyle
Another Reddit fantasy post. Why is Queerty making like Trump and perpetrating ridiculous falsehoods? Stop.
Paco
I don’t believe it. If it is true, then that mother is guilty of abuse no differently than the parents that try to convince their gay children that they are straight. This guy needs to seek out advice on how to deal with his mother’s problems from a qualified professional rather than random people from Reddit.
But again, I have my doubts about this story.
Jack Meoff
What an absolute load of crap. If a mother was able to make her child act against his true nature and be in a gay relationship for years and having sex with a man then the opposite would also be true and we would all be living miserable lives married to women. Where do they get this rubbish from?
JaredMacBride
I wonder if this is the “raising my rainbow” boy. What a sick mother he has.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Thank glittery Christ she didn’t think he was trans
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Maybe it’s my browser (?) but on my iPad this site is at the point of unusabllity going the same way as Pink News for horrible user experience
Herman75
Selfish boy can’t learn to zuck k0ck to please mommy?
crowebobby
I knew a Cuban mother back in the 50’s who was trying to make her son (only 6 at the time) gay to spite her macho husband, to whom this would have been to most devastating thing imaginable. She dressed the boy in girl’s clothes, gave him only what were considered girl’s toys to play with and did everything she thought would push him that direction. The father was no longer living with them so he had no control over the son’s behavior. I don’t know how it turned out.
DCguy
This is a fake right wing trolling point.
IT supports the idea that gay relationships are a choice, blah blah blah.
Why is Queerty putting up stuff like this?