Yesterday, Queerty reported that Roger Gorley was arrested and forcibly removed from a hospital where is husband, Allen, was receiving medical attention. Allen had been submitted to the Research Medical Center in Kansas City instead of St. Luke’s Hospital in Lee’s Summit where he regularly went for treatments of his depression.
This decision, which was made by Allen’s family, was in direct contrast to his and Roger’s medical treatment wishes. Even though Roger has power of attorney, his directions were not recognized by the family or the hospital staff.
According to ThinkProgress, Roger’s daughter Amanda gave a detailed account of what happened inside the hospital resulting in her father’s arrest. The site breaks down the account into the couple’s background, the dispute with the family that lead to the violent arrest and the aftermath.
Two of the most disturbing details to come out of Amanda’s account:
- The nurse informed Roger that because of his agitated state, he needed to leave. When he explained that he intended to stay with his husband, she replied, “I know who you two are. You need to leave.” Refusing to acknowledge their legal relationship, she called the police to have Roger forcibly removed.
- The police assumed because Roger is gay that he must have HIV. The brutal struggle had drawn blood, and one officer was so disturbed that he insisted on using gloves to handle Roger and refused to even take back his handcuffs.
RSun
Sick, sick, sick!
I am glad this is coming to light. This is a perfect argument for marriage equality. Even with the legal paperwork in place they were still treated as second-hand citizens.
2eo
A few people who I don’t know or have any contact with, ever have dug up some incredibly interesting facts about the nurse in question.
Charles175
Sue, sue, sue, the piss out of all involved in this!
WOWfactor
Andy Cohen needs wake up and to stop talking about his wonderful home state of Missouri. It’s a lousy place to be openly gay. Anybody who can gets the hell out of there. I speak from experience.
FStratford
horrible.
Come on LaTeesha, viveutvivas, tchuy03, CBoapinta, ScaryRussianHeather, John Doe….
why dont you try to defend the horrible bigoted homophobic family memebers and their bigoted homophobic cohort of a hospital worker?
hyhybt
I hopehis husband is out of the hospital soon, orat least can be moved to another one.
DOFEK
One more time the fucking Christian, shown their real face!. No wonder the Jewish people heat us, so much, but, so as the most of the world. AdamHomo
Cam
And of course all the trolls were on this story early on trying to claim that the gay couple were the ones causing the problems.
The bigots lie and try to say that gays have rights. Well here are the facts.
They had a Power of attorney.
The hospital knew who they were.
The patient said he wanted his husband in the room with him and didn’t want his brother in there.
The hospital ignored both the patients wishes AND their legal power of attorney and threw the husband out because the patients family told them too.
With legal marriage this never could have happened.
viveutvivas
@FStratford, I suggest you read my comments on the previous thread on this issue before putting words in my mouth.
viveutvivas
@Cam, marriage would help some but it is a half baked solution to this particular problem. There are many of us who are single who would rather have Satan making medical decisions for us than a family member.
viveutvivas
…and note that I am not being against marriage equality. I’m just saying that it should have been unnecassary here. There should be a way of ensuring access to those perons the patient prefers. Power of Attorney obviously didn’t work here.
viveutvivas
By the way, my position on marriage has always been that it should not give people, gay or straight, any right or privileges that single people don’t have. If it does (and that is the whole basis of the marriage equality movement), then it is just another firm of discrimination. As a single person, I am tired of being discriminated against in everything from taxes to inheritance.
/firm/form above (iPad editor has problems with this website).
RSun
@viveutvivas: True, but legal marriage would definitely have helped in this case.
RSun
@viveutvivas: I understand your point, but with any relationship status (single or coupled) comes a different set of pros and cons. Unfortunately for you, tax and inheritance “discrimination” is one of them. Straight and gay singles should be treated the same, just as gay and straight couples should be treated the same. That is the crux of the equal rights battle.
Batchain
Again, no matter how clearly spelled out a law is on the books it can be bent, swayed and even ignored situationally by anyone who decides that he or she has that overriding right in any specific instance and here, “tradition” is maintained.
One more ugly fact of life: “Gay = ‘HIV'”. We’ve all heard it said that, “first impressions are lasting impressions”, so it should come as no surprise that — long after no longer hearing “GRID(S)[“Gay-Related Immunodeficiency (Syndrome)] and “The Gay Plague” — it still remains largely embedded in the collective public consciousness that “Gay = AIDS”.
tdx3fan
@viveutvivas: That is because Satan would do a better job and does not have an agenda!
Eric Auerbach
Shit like this pisses me off.
tdx3fan
@viveutvivas: You can have any view you desire to have, but your view goes against everything the law says, so you might want to consider changing it. Until you change the law, marriage does grant more privileges and more responsibilities than being single. Argue for that to get changed if you wish, but please do so after we win the right to be married.
tdx3fan
@Batchain: That is because more money, time and effort is spent on raising awareness for AIDS by gays then on any other cause. Gays themselves made gay=AIDs through their own media image. The right wing just twisted it a little further, but by no means created the myth.
If we would distance ourselves from AIDs and allow those that get the disease through their own stupidity to deal with, then we would not lend such credence to the myth, but since we are mostly bleeding heart liberals that will never happen.
For the record, if I ever got HIV I would realize that I have no one to blame for my contracting HIV other than myself.
hyhybt
@RSun: Maybe, but then again, the solution to people breaking the law is rarely more laws.
viveutvivas
@tdx3fan, have some solidarity. People with HIV are being slut-shamed enough by society at large and by many in the gay “community” in quotation marks. Let’s not contribute to that.
LaTeesha
Further proof why I don’t trust straight people.
Raquel Santiago
Really??? in todays society? god educate dont discriminate. My hearts goes out to both of them.
Batchain
@tdx3fan: If after more than thirty years of *total immersion* and saturation with “HIV/AIDS” and a continuous, unbroken diet of it, *it* becomes more you than *you*!
Bull’s-eye here, tdx3fan:”Gays themselves made gay=AIDs through their own media image. The right wing just twisted it a little further, but by no means created the myth.” And yet another, very precise spot-on here: “If we would distance ourselves from AIDs and allow those that get the disease through their own stupidity to deal with, then we would not lend such credence to the myth, but since we are mostly bleeding heart liberals that will never happen.”
You nailed it saying,”…but since we are mostly bleeding heart liberals that will never happen.”
Tragically, you’re right, it just won’t. Over the years it’s begun to resemble a secular religion for the so-called “LGBT” and has a quality that compares to an almost imperceptible and unbreaking ringing in your ears.
RSun
@hyhybt: True!
Raquel Santiago
@Batchain: Many of us who live in LGBTQQYIA friendly areas live in a “bubble” so to speak. When we travel outside of these areas its horrendous some of the things that occur with members of our “family”.
hyhybt
@Raquel Santiago: Some day, that bubble will include the whole world… but right now, it’s all too small.
Dinodogstar
ya’ all have no idea what it’s like in Missouri,,and i’m in Saint Louis,,this is Rush Limbaugh, Sen Todd Akin (of the ‘legitimate rape’ story, and homeland of the Beverly Hillbillies… but to add some info about the hospital itself… http://www.dolus.org/story-11.html
Scribe38
This is so wrong! Does anyone know of any organization that is helping this man, or anyone taking donations for a lawyer? THIS IS WHY MARRIAGE EQUALITY IS SO IMPORTANT. I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO GO TO A LAWYER AND PAY FEES FOR MY PARTNER TO GET TO DECIDE WHAT HAPPENS TO ME WHEN I AM ILL. I SHOULD NOT HAVE TO WORRY THAT MY PARTNER’S FAMILY WILL TRY AND TAKE THE HOUSE IF HE DIES BEFORE I DO. THIS IS SAD. WE NEED TO FIGHT FOR THESE GUYS.
Make It Great
This type of thing is common in small cities AND large cities. Bigotry is everywhere, including in the gay community. Once we learn to treat others as we want to be treated, life will get better. Until then…