Mormon Leader Aligns Gay Fight With Afterlife

The proverbial puss has been let out of the bag!

Mormon elder M. Russell Ballard, a man the “faithful” regard as a prophet, admitted in a church message this week that his church’s schemes against gay marriage are more than just policy – it’s personal. And part of some post-life, VIP theocracy.

Said Ballard:

We know that it is not without controversy, yet let me be clear that at the heart of this issue is the central doctrine of eternal marriage and it’s place in our Father’s plan.

Many of you are probably scratching your pretty heads and wondering, “Hey, what’s this ‘eternal marriage’? I thought death did us part!” Not according to the Mormon faith.

Box Turtle Bulletin explains that an eternal marriage – which is “sealed” by super secret ceremony and can also be performed by proxy after death – guarantees a sacred union in heaven, or the “celestial kingdom.” This kingdom has three levels and only the eternally married can get into the top tier, which sounds pretty snobby to us.

In fighting gay marriage, says Ballard, devout Mormon’s are doing “the word of the Lord.” Well, if that’s the case, why doesn’t this Lord guy come down and cast his own vote. Then and only then would be convinced by such a theoretical argument.