NC Cafe Owner Gives Lesbian Customers Note Condemning Homosexuality

Each week, Queerty picks one blowhard, hypocrite, airhead, sanctimonious prick or other enemy of all that is queer to be the Douche of the Week. 

Screen Shot 2013-01-11 at 1.46.09 AMHave a nominee for DOTW? E-mail it to us at [email protected].

Ariel and Shawnee McPhail left the Stingray Cafe in New Bern, North Carolina, with a bad taste in their mouth.

Not because of what the couple (at right) ate, but because of what owner Ed McGovern did as they were leaving. He handed them a letter that included biblical condemnations of homosexuality and a plea to change “before it’s too late.”

The poorly-spelled handwritten note read:

Screen Shot 2013-01-11 at 1.45.17 AM“God said in the last days that man and wom[a]n would be lover of self, more [than] the lover of God.

That man and woman would have unnatural [affection] for one another. Then, the coming of the Son of Man, who is Jesus. So please, look at your life. See how it hurt[s] everyone around you. And ask the Lord to open your eye[s] before it [is] to[o] late.

The Love of Christ

P.S. my daughter also was gay. It destroy[ed] her life and my grandson.”

McGovern confirmed the December 4 incident with NewsChannel 12 and said he’d done the same with another lesbian couple in the past.

He claims he gave the McPhails the note because they were kissing outside his establishment, but the women say he’s got a screw loose:

“First of all, we didn’t kiss. We don’t kiss in public. We were holding hands,” said Shawnee McPhail. “Secondly, if I did kiss my wife in public, what married couple would you go to and say, ‘How dare you—you cannot hold hands and you cannot kiss in public’?”

It’s enough to make you want to give Stingray Cafe what for on its Yelp page.

All together now: What a douche!

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  • alexoloughlin

    If anything, sounds like this self-righteous religious bigot had more to do with destroying his daughter’s and grandson’s lives by rejecting his own flesh and blood.

  • Steve Rider

    I’m certain that Jesus would be proud of this moron if there really were Invisible Sky Monsters.

    When you want stupid go directly to religion, do not stop at reality, do not collect an IQ.

    The reason Christianity appeals so strongly to idiots is because it removes any obligation to think about anything.

  • Thom in MD

    I noticed he took their money before he gave them the letter.

  • Nicholas

    @Thom in MD: Are you really surprised that a self-righteous hypocrite has no integrity?

  • Thom in MD

    @Nicholas: No not at all.

  • RomanHans

    I almost want to excuse the guy because his good intentions are clear. ALMOST. On the other hand, it would be nice to be able to get through a meal without some religious a$$h0Ie handing you a note saying you’re an abomination.

  • Aidan8

    Hey now! Be gentle with Ed! After all, he’s worked hard over the years to tolerate serving the nips, kikes, and spics… not to mention those blacks. Now we expect him to tolerate those homosexuals? I mean, come on, a good man like Ed can tolerate just so much. Well… at least he loves the Lord.

  • IzzyLuna

    You lost me at “God said…”

  • Sohobod

    Crazy but at least he was polite. And from what we keep hearing about Americans with guns, that is something!

  • Avenger

    @Aidan8: “Now we expect him to tolerate those homosexuals? I mean, come on, a good man like Ed can tolerate just so much.”

    Yeah, really.

  • Charli Girl

    @2eo: @Ogre Magi:

  • T7

    This guy was your Douche of the Week? Must have been a slow week indeed. I’m not one to comment on here, but I had to after I saw this trash. Listen, McGovern may be quite misguided and uninformed, but he isn’t the outright bigot you and others portray him to be on here and Yelp. By definition, bigotry involves intolerance-something McGovern does not demonstrate by giving the couple a private letter. Quite the opposite. He was well-intentioned, and many people like him still think it is possible to “leave” homosexuality. My own mom gave me this type of “literature” when I first came out 5 years ago in high school. Bigotry would have been not allowing the couple to dine at the establishment after he had spotted them holding hands. But that’s not what transpired. And now you’ve made a bunch of people-who’ve never even been to the restaurant-go and spam the Yelp page to argue otherwise. Get real. This isn’t Westboro we’re dealing with. It was a well-meaning individual with genuine intent to help people,terribly misguided as he was. Can you say overreaction??! Classy. Grats, man! You’re MY pick for Douche of the Week.

  • Charli Girl

    Are you for real man? Maybe you should go back to NOT commenting!!
    First of all,do YOU need his approval? Did YOU ask for him to write a freaking
    judgmental letter? Who shives a git what the heck he approves of? That is HIS beliefs NOT
    the couple that he delivered the stupid letter too! Do YOU think he delivers letters all freaking
    day to EVERY couple that swings thru those doors? This is EXACTLY what we are fighting right now!
    Those women have EVERY right to do what loving couples do WHEREVER THEY GO without some bible thumper chasing them down with a “disapproval ” letter!!
    I’ve been in that place …TRUST me if he would’ve done something like that to me,I would’ve embarrassed him so bad he would’ve been crying when i got done with him!

  • mike777

    He owns the place.
    He can do what he wants.
    Just like the lesbians will chose to not go back.

  • 2eo

    @Charli Girl: T7 is a new account, the same person has made several 1 and 2 post accounts since the new year, unfortunately I can’t narrow it down other than the person is posting from south west Kentucky.

  • FStratford


    Bull. I am willing to bet that his intolerance has contributed in the “destruction” of her daughter and grandson’s life.

    He is a douche.

  • Charli Girl

    (Big Cajun smile)… Good detective work my brother…. Yeah these people that are NOT on board with the movement will STILL enjoy their civil rights and liberties in the end due to people like you and I moving FORWARD! Just take a moment to look at the difference in their behavior patterns…JUST 5years ago the old man would’ve kicked them out,and now his type is so graciously handing them a little note…
    We ARE making progress and America IS changing! Unfortunately people like T7 are STILL accepting hate and willing to stay in the closet to brew more intolerance for the haters! They HAVE to be called out on discrimination or we will never have equality. I don’t care HOW gracious they are…bigotry IS bigotry,no matter HOW its served!

    Look at Louie Giglio…thrown out in JUST 24hours once the W.H. found out about his anti gay bigot speech back In the 90’s…I LOVE the fact that the world is FINALLY embracing ALL people,not just 65 year old white str8 males!!!

  • MK Ultra

    @Charli Girl: Exactly! Bigotry with a smile is still bigotry. Because it’s becoming no longer socially acceptable to outright hate LGBT, the bigots think if they hide their hate behind “concern”, it makes them look better. Sorry, they can change masks all they want to. It’s the same ugly mug underneath.

  • T7


    Ha! Some detective…I live in New York bro, and this is my FIRST account. And there’s no one more on board with this movement. Nor do I sit idly by and wait for the benefits of the movement. I was even involved with the marriage campaign last year in Maine. But I also have a concept of proportionality and this could have been handled on a 2-1 basis with the couple and the man. If we’re going to change peoples’ minds we have to have these types of tactful conversations, much like the ones in Maine. On the other hand, if the couple had truly been discriminated against, then by all means go to the press and let the world know. That’s not what happened, and this could hardly be considered bigotry-let alone the likes of which we’ve seen from other religious nuts. But if you’re looking to be a victim (instead of using the moment as an opportunity to possibly change someone’s mind), you’ll find a reason, as you’ve fallaciously done here.

  • gppm1103

    @alexoloughlin: Exactly what I thought. Gee, I wonder if he had said “I love you no matter what”, maybe she and his grandson would not have been “destroyed”.

Comments are closed.