the skew

Neil Patrick Harris to Rupert Everett: Coming Out Didn’t Sink Your Career Alone

Well, maybe Neil Patrick Harris‘ words on The View for fellow homo-thesbian Rupert Everett weren’t that harsh, but there was definitely a “quit your whining” message in here. Which is easier to say when you’re a terrifically successful actor.

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  • Cj Maciejeski

    I’m pretty sure the drum-skin face lift helped to sink that ship….

  • mk

    I wonder if this is going to be the start of a bitch fight between NPH and Rupert Everett?

    NPH is correct about being out not sinking RE’s career. I’m sure it’s had some impact on his career, but regardless of being out after My Best Friend’s Wedding the critics and a sizable American fanbase loved Rupert. He had it in the palm of his hand but he screwed it up with bad choices about films and interviews and by being a dick to work with.

  • David Ehrenstein

    Plus a ton and half of ‘tude. I can’t think of another actor who’s fucked up his career so much and so often.

  • Sexy Rexy

    I’ve heard several tales, as well as the fact that he also gets a little too crazy with his lovers. He likes to play stalker. Allegedly.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    Yeah, I have heard that Rupert was a fucking dick on set to work with so that kind of stuff when you are up and comer as he was after My Best Friend Weddings tends to stick in the mind of directors deciding who to cast. I mean- you can be a dick if you are Tom Cruise and bankable. But if you are a B lister (as he was at the time) then you need to be humble or at least fake it.

  • Gridlock


    Everette is a bitter old hag who sounds absolutely dreadful to be around. Nonstop negativity, bitching and victimization from him. That’s all you hear.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    I wonder how he explains other successful actors? I mean- there are quite few successful out actors right now.

  • Franco

    He didn’t really say anything negative about Rupert, so I’m not so sure why everyone is turning this into a feud between the two. I think Rupert’s career isn’t as bad as he thinks it is, nor do I think NPH’s career will advance beyond HIMYM. Acting is a difficult profession to be successful at, and to sustain that success is even harder. But the more people who come out and are vocal about being gay is certainly beneficial to the gay community as a whole. I enjoy them both.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    @Franco: NPH said what we said in a polite way. However, the underlying meaning is the same as you are reading here. Rupert is a better actor than NPH, but that does not change the fact that Rupert is also a dick. There are other out actors who are in the biz and doing fairly well despite being out. Also, I have no idea who you are talking about when you speak of Rupert like NPH being supportive of the gay community. That’s just fantasy. He’s been a dick to other gay people too.

  • Franco

    @D’oh, The Magnificent: I think it’s subjective as to who is the better actor and as I don’t know Rupert, I will refrain from calling him inappropriate names. I also never said that either men were being supportive of the gay community what I said was that anyone who comes out and is vocal about being gay (as both actors are) is a good thing for the community as a whole, regardless if they are supportive of said community.

  • hephaestion

    NPH rules!

    And frankly, Rupert just isn’t all that good looking. THAT’s why he never got to be the first gay James Bond. He’s just a bit odd-looking.

  • Gimme A Break

    Rupert’s comments about surrogate parenting and gay marriage proved that his time has come and gone. He should consider retirement.

  • Jon (still the other)

    Everett is just a jerk. He doesn’t get offered work for that reason. . .he’s pigeonholed himself into gay martyr, but the reality is that very few people want to work with him. . .Yeah, being gay doesn’t give you a free pass to unicorns . . .a person has to follow up with some integrity.

  • [email protected]

    So now the gay celebs are eating their own. Lovely.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    I have to assume some of you are sock puppets.

  • Jon (still the other)

    not a sock puppet here. . .the term “jerk” was being nice. . .try working with him sometime.

  • hardmannyc

    “nor do I think NPH’s career will advance beyond HIMYM”

    He hosted the Tonys. He starred as a sex-crazed druggie in the harold & kumar movies. He’s got movie offers. You’re wrong. The ladies are crazy about him. Like Cheyenne Jackson, they know where he puts his peter, but they still lust after him.

    That’s progress!

  • Franco

    @hardmannyc: But that’s my point, like Rupert was in the 80s and 90s NPH is popular now, but to sustain that popularity, that’s the challenge. It isn’t easy and the chances are slim. That’s all I’m saying. He can prove me wrong and I will most certainly champion him for his success.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    @Franco: He’s already staring in a couple of movies, including a lead role in the Smurfs. More over, he’s not the only gay actor who is out working in hollywood. The problem with your argument is that it is already false.

  • Michael

    Whether NPH remains a desired actor in Hollywood or on Broadway in five years will depend less on his sexuality and more on a host of other variables that make any actor a hot commodity.

    For goodness sakes, until Harold and Kumar, no one was talking about NPH. Does anyone remember the crap fest ‘Stark Raving Mad’? Careers depend on more than what one does in the sack, which was his entire point.

  • Pip

    that’s kind of goofy coming from neil patrick harris. just because the stars aligned for one person doesn’t mean there isn’t any homophobia in the world. liikee, get over yourself bud.

  • suzygoo

    Folks were not talking about NPH before Harold and Kumar? Poor ole Dr. Doogie Howser! How soon they forget! Why I was so upset when you played that druggie in Harold and Kumar but that scene where you branded that harlot. That made me laugh so hard-well, I had a little accident. You go Girl! As for Mr. Everett-he used to make me warm in the secret spot but never made me had a little accident like Dr. Doogie Howser!

  • Robert, NYC

    With all the anti Rupert Everett sentiment on this post, don’t lose sight of the fact that the major reason Rupert doesn’t get plum roles is that he was openly critical of Hollywood and the closeted actors who remain silent. He stuck his neck out and paid the price. I agree, he should have kept his mouth shut about marriage equality though, but I’m not going to bash him.


    @Gridlock: “Everette is a bitter old hag who sounds absolutely dreadful to be around. Nonstop negativity, bitching and victimization from him. That’s all you hear.”
    Agreed. But he more than makes up for that with his acting talent. Rent “Stage Beauty” if you doubt my words. Perhaps he channels his unpleasant person into greater creativity.

  • Fitz

    I think that some of you are being much harsher on Rupert than NPH was.

  • Franco

    @D’oh, The Magnificent: I don’t have an argument, I’m stating an opinion, my purpose is not argue or debate but to share ideas. I began by stating that most people commenting here were creating a feud against the two actors, when what NPH said was quite respectful and not meant to be the dig this article was implying. I was responding to the comments of those on this thread. I’m glad he’s working, my point is that it’s hard to sustain work as an actor, he may be getting work now but it’s hard to predict that he will always be as popular. I hope he is, but it’s impossible to accurately predict 100% that he will. Rupert’s career was in film, and my initial point was not to to attack him personally with name calling, attempt to lift the discussion not bring it down.

  • Maren

    Neil wasn`t rude towards Rupert. He just said it like it is. It`s never onley one reason why your carriere didn`t go like you maybe hoped it too go: He answered in a good way,respect fully, classic as always. The community need some more good and stable models that Neil and David are,and the healthy relationship they have. He does more good for the community than very many others for the way he lives his life – and it is in the public eye. and In an arena where there are not many other open gay people who are in a relationship – or onley openly gay for that matter.

    And he did put his career on the line when he came out -but because the way he behave, and he stay tall when he do it, he work hard every day too have that career that he have – it didn`t come for free.I think thats is way he have alot of diffrent work, and all this are helping to change minstream opinions about gay people – every day

    He have never said that he want to be a big a list movie star – he have said for a time now that he hope to change to became a director some day.

    he should get more praise for what he does instead, many are trying to find something they can criticize him on – all the time

  • ossurworld

    Three bombs and you’re out in show biz.

  • Cam

    I remember an interview Rupert Everett did on, I think it was the Jay Leno Show believe it or not, in which he was talking about responding to a less than flattering fan letter by sending them a letter back with some pubic hair taped to it. I just don’t think the guy was cut out to be int he public eye. He would probably have enjoyed life more if he’d stuck to doing theater in England. I think his temperment was a bit too high strung for his public persona.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    @Franco: You think opinions are not arguments or should be based in reality. In that case, I believe I can fly and will sprout wings right now to do so. I just wanted to share that with you.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    @Franco: Stating something is your opinion contra to present thought does not give it magic protection against being questioned. Your opinion is your argument. They are one and the same. The fact you want to separate out the two says a lot.

  • Jeff

    @D’Oh, I have several questions for you. 1) Name one “successful” out gay actor who is in the same the league as rising young actors such as: James MacAvoy, Hugh Dancy, Rob Pattinson, Rupert Friend, Ben Barnes, Ben Whishaw (he’s not out) et al., or on this side of the Atlantic: Channing Tatum, James Franco, Ryan Gosling, Joseph Gordon Levitt, EMile Hirsch, Shia Le Bouf, Chris Evans, Ryan Reynolds, Taylor Kitsch, perhaps Zachary Quinto or Chris Pine, et al., or in France: Gaspar Ulliel or Louis Garrel, Mexico: Gael Bernal Garcia or anyone in Spain or Italy. I am not even going to ask for examples akin to Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Matt Damon or Hugh Jackman. 2) Please provide examples of Rupert being “a dick” to work worth – interviews with co-stars or directors, first hand knowledge, confirmed with facts: “My friend/source ________ worked with Rupert on “——-” as a “_______” and said that he was a “dick” to work with. It’s very easy to post unsubstantiated comments on this blog. If they are true, you should have the balls to back them up with facts. We are not in junior high school any longer.

    I think that most are missing the point here. A careful reading of Rupert’s comments about coming out specifically referenced young actors (25-27) being out in the US, UK and Italy, all industry markets that he has worked in. Rupert does have some experience working in said industry enclaves. Whether or not his belief that his being out is the sole cause of his career woes is correct is beside the point. The creator of “Mad Men” recently advised against actors coming out and he hires and fires actors – How do we say Bryan Bratt? It is common knowledge that agents, managers, producers, directors, etc., have all contributed to the homophobia that hurts the careers of lgbt actors in mainstream Hollywood and that the situation still exists. The problem exists and it probably explains why NPH wasn’t publicly out until he was outed, why Mr. Bomer is so guarded about his private life, why Ricky Martin waited so long to acknowledge that he is gay. There is a problem and at least Rupert confronted it when he came out voluntarily over TWENTY years ago! TWENTY YEARS AGO, PEOPLE. Not after blogs started commenting on his being gay. Rupert was still relatively young and had some potential for leading man roles when he came out, regardless of whether or not he was difficult to work with. I cannot think of anyone else with a similar career trajectory who has subsequently come out. Please illuminate me, especially you, D’Oh. Remember, a similar career trajectory, not tv, cable or stage, leading roles in theatrical films with other name actors.

    It is also important to note that Rupert came out on his own. As did Ellen, Wanda, Luke MacFarlane, Jonathan Groff, Cheyenne Jackson, Gavin Creel, Wilson Cruz, et al. NPH came out AFTER he was outed. Right after, but after nonetheless. Then there is Matthew Bomer. I am a big NPH fan, btw. Rupert may have contributed to his career problems but having come out over twenty years ago before anyone had the balls to do so, I think that he is entitled to blame his career woes on whatever he wants to. It’s not as if Richard Chambelain. Tab Hunter, Farley Granger, Rock Hudson, et al. came out in their prime.

    I think that it will be interesting to watch what happens with Jonathan Groff’s career(“Spring Awakenings,” “Glee,” and “Woodstock”). He is the only out actor that I can think of who might be in a position to overcome Hollywood’s rampant homophobia and obtain leading man roles. I wouldn’t hold my breath, however. Certainly Cheyenne and Luke have the potential to play leading man or the secondary lead in films and they haven’t been snatched up for any mainstream films, have they?


  • Ruddigore

    Between the time of Rupert Everett’s breakout roll in “Another Country” in 1984 and his coming out in 1989 he made some questionable career choices which are more likely the reason he career never took off. He turned down “A Room With A View” and made crap like “Hearts of Fire”. His performances could also be rather spotty. Try watching his sex scene with Miranda Richardson in “Dance With A Stranger” – it is so dull that it’s like watching paint dry.

  • Robert, NYC

    No. 34, Jeff….you said it all, I totally concur with your view on Rupert Everett, one of the few who had the guts and the courage to come out as long ago as 20 years. I admire him for that alone. At least he was true to himself, honest and upfront which is more than can be said for most in the business. In a way, Rupert has made it better for the up and coming generation of gay actors to come out early on in their careers instead of living in the closet and the accompanying fear that someone may out them, career or no career. I doubt if NPH would have come out if the threat of outing him wasn’t a possibility, a huge difference between him and Rupert. At least Rupert had the strength of character to do it on his own, voluntarily.

  • zenflo

    As a college student, I loved Rupert Everett and Miranda Richardson in Dance With a Stranger, 1985. But as time passed, I realized Dance was much more enjoyable due to Richardson’s acting chops.

    Her just-under-the-surface desperation, and the way she unravels in that film is really something to see. Everett’s role required him to be cold, moody and indifferent — which many would say today was not that much of a stretch.

    I do, remember, though, going to a signing for his first book (!) in Gainesville (!!) at A Different Light bookstore, late ’80s. Trust me, the line was anything but out the door and around the block, but to be fair, he had yet to score with mainstream America.

    Recently, I caught his Eurofilm debacle, Cemetery Man, on cable. Oh, dear. While I’m an ardent zombie movie lover, this was really a stinker for the ages. I watched it twice, anyway.

    Rupert IS quite the complainer, and my guess is that most reports of bad on-the-set behavior have merit.

    Still, to compare Rupert and Neil’s acting/career success will always be a case of apples and oranges.

    I will gently note their difference in age, if only to point out that favorable conditions for out actors do grow with each “mini-era.”

    But perhaps more to the crux of the matter, they are polar opposites in presentation. One is rather dark, lofty and reserved. The other is sunny, garrulous and welcoming.

    For American audiences, the blond charmer will always prevail.

  • Rikard

    I like Rupert and also think his downward spiral is over reported, but like all men our age it hard to stay sunny and optimistic as you notice your looks changing and your career loosing velocity. That happens to everyone eventualy. Some handle it with more grace than others. NPH is adorable and continues to improve. I’ll be satisfied when any high caliber out actor plays straight in a romantic comedy or drama with sex scenes and it is a hit. Then I want him to take his boyfriend to the oscars.

  • D'oh, The Magnificent

    @Jeff: Once I write the list, you will dismiss the list. Do you think I have not been here before with someone like you? For that matter, gays as acceptable in film actors is new. You are babes in the cribe compared to AAs which took decades. You have achieved a great deal in less than 10 years.

  • Cam

    @No. 34 · Jeff said… @D’Oh, I have several questions for you. 1) Name one “successful” out gay actor who is in the same the league as rising young actors such as….

    Jeff, the problem is that you are playing a “Chicken and Egg” thing. Is it that America isn’t ready for a sucessful gay actor…or that the young actors have been told that so they are unwilling to come out? Neil Patrick Harrisses career has gotten better since he came out. And if you want to go back in time, Ellens show had falling ratings and was going to be cancelled, her coming out gave her it’s highest rated season ever (Lets not get into the next season where the show became depressing and stoped being a comedy.)

    But the fact is….Rupert said that ocming out hurt “HIS Career”. I’m curious how he thinks that is so. He was out, and became the darling of America and the talk shows after “My Best Friends Wedding” came out…he then preceded to pick one horro show of a project after another…not the least being “The Next Best Thing” with Madonna, that actually many gay people found offensive and upsetting in it’s plotline. He had also written books talking about his early years as a male hustler, drug use etc… so I’m kind of guessing here that that wasn’t great for his career either. I seriously think that if Zak Effron or Taylor Lautner etc… comes out, that they will have careers in front of them. What we need to stop doing is falling for the phony line of “Their sexuality doesn’t matter, so nobody should ask.”

  • Rob Moore

    Joy Behar referred to Rupert as “the great English actor”. I don’t think he is actually all that great as an actor. He is mediocre in my opinion and has appeared in mostly mediocre or even awful roles. If he fancies himself to be a leading man, I don’t think he has that quality. If I may channel Oscar Wilde, Rupert comes off as somewhat foppish.

  • Jeff

    Dear D’Oh,

    I repeat my request for the list and my guess is that you cannot provide one. I requested a list of up and coming actors in significant roles who are out gay actors in mainstream or prestigious productions. The examples that I provided were valid and on point. You cannot provide such a list because there are no out actors who would fit the bill. The operative word is “out.” Of course there are out actors working in gay indie films, low budget indie films, secordary and very supporting roles but that wasn;t what we were discussing.

    You also evaded my question about your sources for Rupert’s being “a dick.” Answer the question! Who is your source (s), what projects, what capacity, etc. Substantiate your allegations.

    With regard to the rest of your message, I didn’t understand it.

    @Cam: I agree with you in part as Rupert’s antics and comments have certainly not helped him. NPH’s career has improved but I haven’t seen him sign to co-star with Cate Blanchett, Julia Roberts, Angelina, Penelope, et al. As far as a Zac or a Taylor are concerned, since their fanbase skews younger I question whether their career would continue at the same level if they were gay and came out. I would hope so but I doubt it.


  • Bjørnar

    I agree with what neil said. He replied in a respectful manner and said how he saw it

    I think Neil is the most famous actor who is open gay and is a long term relationship. N and D are putting themselves out there and in the mainstream. i dont think I know anybody else who get that publicity when he is on different events – and he does not hide David like many of the other openly guy actor does.
    I think N + d are the best role models gay community have.

    Neil is very successful, he does not need to worry that he will be out of job when HIMYM is over. He has worked since he was small, and the offers keep coming.He is not interested in becoming an A list actor, he has other plans for the future he would like to.

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