A new survey conducted by DrEd, an online resource that connects patients with doctors, has some interesting insight in how different generations views sexuality. A total 1,000 men and women from the U.S. and U.K. participated in the study. Let’s look at some of the findings…
When asked if sexuality exists on a spectrum, 34% of men and 20% of women said yes. Generationally, Gen Xers were the most likely to agree, with 46% saying they believed in a sliding scale of sexuality, compared to just 11% of Millennials and 5% of Baby Boomers.
Related: This married gay couple wanted to spice things up… so they became a bisexual thruple
When asked if they would ever date a person who identifies as bisexual, just 30% of men and only 19% of women said they’d be down with it. Once again, Gen Xers were the most open-minded, with 38% saying they’d be OK with a bisexual partner. But just 7% of Millennials and 3% of Baby Boomers felt similarly.
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Interestingly, when asked whether they themselves would considering sleeping with someone of the same gender, 20% of men and 34% of women said they’d give it a whirl. Gen Xers were once again the most likely, with 29% saying they’d try same-sex love making. But Baby Boomers came in at a close second, with 25%. Followed by Millennials at 20%.
Related: Can you guess which of these people is bisexual?
So what’s the take away from all this? Well, clearly biphobia is still a big problem in society. Even though some of these numbers are better than others, the vast majority of people from every generation still don’t believe in sexual fluidity. Oddly, however, a good handful of them say they’d act of their own bisexual curiosities, but they’re not nearly as comfortable dating someone who does the same.
Ummmm Yeah
It ain’t biphobia it’s biexperience. And it ain’t an experience most people want to repeat.
Laura Hurt
Thanks for proving the point.
It’s biphobia to blame bisexuality for the bad experiences with a few of them. I am bisexual myself, and I know many many many bisexuals, and not a single one of them have been behaving in such a way that it would put bisexuality in a bad light. I know a lot of gay people that cheat. Now if I were to go around saying that having relationships with gay people is not worth it because they’re all cheaters, I’d never hear the end of it. But when it concerns bisexuals, it’s suddenly okay.
It’s not okay.
CastleSF
I don’t doubt some guys are truly bisexuals but I have deep suspicion about them. It takes a special gay to want to be be with a bi guy. You never know when the wind will shift and loyalty is abandoned. The next thing you know, your bi boyfriend marries a woman.
Lacuevaman
its very different walking on the wild side than living with the wild side. folks cannot equate monogamy with bisexuality.
Paco
I’ve said it before… Gen X is the most balanced, open minded, live-and-let-live generation alive today.
CastleSF
@Paco. Maybe GenX is one generation lacking in moral conviction and proper discipline.
Paco
Or maybe their “moral convictions” end where another person’s begins.
lauraspencer
Huh? We have been told for years now that millennials are fluid, open-minded, don’t like labels and are the most progressive generation. This study suggests otherwise.
Paco
Being the most progressive is just as bad as being the most conservative when less extreme points of view aren’t allowed to be considered.
Plus, while millennials do tend to be more fluid with their sexual identities, they also seem to be very conservative when it comes to actual sexual activity and very selfish socially.
JK 1984
I wouldn’t put much stock in these numbers.
1000 people across two countries with approx 400 million people living in then and at least three generational groups (baby boomers, gen x & millenials). Even 1000 people from each generation group would be too small a sample. It is like the report last week (I think it was on here) that people are becoming less accepting of LGBT individuals. Unless you have a massive survey sample covering the majority of the country or specific area you are sampling the results aren’t worth the data it takes to upload them.
Rocinante
JK I have been curious about how to quickly calculate needed sample to be relevant. Found an online calculator. Using your assumption of 400 mil, confidence level of 95% with a confidence interval of +-3, the sample size needs to be 999. Bump it up to 99% and sample needed is around 1,700.
Anyway now I have a tool. Wonder if the reason for Gen X’s Openness may be due to more life experiences tha millennials and having fewer sexual hangups than boomers.
Heywood Jablowme
Dating a 100% gay guy can be complicated enough. (Or for a hetero, dating a 100% hetero.) If you add bisexuality into the equation, that can be intimidating. Can make someone think… well, I’m sure that’s cool for somebody else but I, personally, should move on and keep looking around.
“Oddly, however, a good handful of them say they’d act of [sic] their own bisexual curiosities, but they’re not nearly as comfortable dating someone who does the same.”
It’s not odd at all because dating is a lot more complicated than a one-night stand.
dash_board1
Of course people will take sexual orientation into consideration when entering into a relationship with another person. Why are people acting like that isn’t a valid variable to consider? Sexual orientation will definitely play a part into whether two people are sexually and romantically compatible, so it’s definitely something to consider.
I’ve heard many bisexual people say they prefer being in a relationship with another bisexual because their partner fully knows and understands that sexuality from life experience, is that hetero/homophobic of them? I don’t think so, that’s a valid consideration.
Donston
Most bi identifying I know (who are in same sex relationships) are with someone who identities as gay.
effingwhatever
As a bisexual guy, I’ll vouch for this. I’ve been in serious relationships with gay men and straight women, but I’ve been married to another bi (woman) for 15 years now and the intimacy and comfort that has come from being with another bisexual who understands and shares the nuances of a more complex and layered sexuality has been one of the happiest things in my life. I’m not saying that I believe that a monosexual and a bisexual can’t be compatible or that the odds are stacked against them—all relationships fail until one doesn’t, no matter what the sexuality or gender—but I highly recommend that fellow bisexuals move one another to the front of the line, and that’s not homophobia or heterophobia, it’s just wanting to be with other people who you feel 100% yourself with and who understand one another without feeling insecure. I’m sure it’s the same for monosexuals, it’s just funny to have to talk that out since they’re the de facto combo.
I also don’t think that monosexuals who don’t want to date bisexuals are bad people or wrong for having that preference any more than I’m wrong for the fact that if I were single again I would definitely seek out other bisexuals over monosexuals. (I wouldn’t rule out a willing monosexual partner if they were game, but I’d actively seek other bisexuals.)
Prax07
@Ummmm Yeah You’re so right, soooo right.
thisisnotreal
I myself am not bisexual I’m gay, and I agree that biphobia is a real problem and isn’t fair for bisexuals to have to deal with but I also understand what it is rooted in.
As a gay man dating another gay man you could possibly experience a time where your jealous or slightly possessive of your boyfriend but I think as a rule most gay men are secure in their relationships. But when a person dates someone who identifies as bisexual I think their biphobia surfaces not out of hatred but out of insecurity.
When a man who is exclusively or dominantly into men starts dating a man who is not your brain can play tricks on your sense of self worth causing you to start wondering things like “am I good enough for this person?” “Is there something a woman could offer them that I can’t?” Next thing you know your relationship becomes plagued by doubt and fear of being cheated on or left. Straight and gay relationships probably don’t suffer from these insecurities nearly as much because you know there’s no competition from a different gender for your love and physical attention, you know what you can offer to someone as well as what someone else of the same gender can offer to your partner, but when it’s someone of the opposite gender it becomes a fear and insecurity you can’t easily fight. Feeling like you could lose out on someone’s love and companionship to the opposite gender is a very real fear and insecurity for some people and I think is the root of a lot of biphobia
Donston
“Bi-phobia” has some legitimacy. But simply not wanting to date someone who identifies as bi is not inherently “bi-phobic”. I have some bisexuality in my orientation. And that hasn’t gone away despite not having a relationship or sex with a woman in almost ten years. However, I don’t identify as bi, because despite whatever “fluidity” I have my desires, passions, romantic instincts and romantic satisfaction veer pretty well towards my same gender. I would as well be leery of dating a bi identifying man. Not so much that it would be out of the question. I have done it before. But I would definitely have to get a good handle on the exact dimensions and degrees of their orientation and their sexual and romantic instincts and their motivation (you need to get a handle on those things no matter the identity of your partner). Only a small percentage of people want to be with someone if they don’t at least feel they’re that person’s preference.
But also, this a random “study” of a random 1000 people. I wouldn’t take it so seriously.
Prax07
@Donston It’s exactly the opposite with the bi guys I know that I haven’t cut contact with yet. Relationships with women only, side sex with guys only.
Donston
I was talking specially about bi identifying people who are in same-sex relationships. Most of the ones I know are with gay-identifying individuals. You almost always seem to be talking about closet cases and guys on the DL.
Donston
A lot of this is about socialogy, sense of self, identity and practicality. I would wager that at most 40% of people are completely, entirely 100% straight or gay. Being with someone who admits to having some kind of same-sex/opposite sex attractions or with someone who has indulged bi behavior or wouldn’t mind indulging it, that’s very different than being with someone who has taken on a bi identity, feels deep “bi pride”, feels strongly connected to women and men both sexually and romantically and perhaps is looking to get constant sexual and romantic attention from multiple genders. Those are simply two very different scenarios. A big part of having a serious relationship with someone involves a level of comfort. You can’t make yourself feel comfortable with something you’re not. But everyone’s comfort is different. And every relationship is a case by case.
I will say that being a full-on, legitimate 50/50 bi person cannot be easy socially, romantically and especially psychologically. Having real, persistent and substantial attraction, arousal, desire, and romantic interest and instincts towards men and women can’t be easy to live with, and it unfortunately can’t be easy for someone who doesn’t have that kind of mentality to have relationships with.
Finally, this is another “study” that’s not really a study at all, just asking a few random people some random questions.
chris33133
If it’s online, it’s not very scientific. For starters, selection provides a huge biasing factor. So until I see a real study, I say “meh.” On behalf of the “Knights of Meh.”
Prax07
@Donston If a guy tells me he’s bi, then I consider him bi. If he’s a closet case or dl, then that’s a whole other story. All I know is what I know. The bi guys here in nepa, including guys just visiting from metro areas, all seem to be as I said. Relationships with women, sex with men, not the other way round. You’re experience may be totally different than mine, all I know is what I know through my own experiences with these guys.
Donston
My experience is indeed totally different. However, I don’t meet random people. Most of the bi-identifying people I know (including family members) are a part of my social group or have been. As I mentioned, there are probably more people with some bi-sexuality in their orientation than people who are 100%, completely straight or gay. So, depending on whatever someone calls themselves isn’t gonna give you a ton of insight. Understanding who someone is beyond that identity, understanding their attractions, desires, romantic instincts, romantic satisfaction, level of self-comfort and how much their behavior is driven by socialogy is the key to finding out if they’re compatible or not.
dash_board1
@Prax07, I think your experience is the far more common one, I’ve seen it firsthand myself. But, aside from the anecdotal encounters, surveys show that well over 80% of bisexuals are in opposite sex relationships.
@Donston, could you explain why you reject the bisexual label? You indicate you are sexually attracted to men and women (with a preference for men), that’s bisexual. You seem to be attaching a lot of other components to the term that have nothing to do with actual sexual attraction. I understand it is important to you to be as specific as possible with your desires but isn’t that a personal discussion between you and your current partner, where you discuss the intricacies of your bisexuality. Do you think the word ‘bisexual’ only applies to those who are close to 50/50 attraction between the sexes? Because it doesn’t. Bisexuality is the spectrum that lies between the polar ends of heterosexuality and homosexuality, if someone is sexually attracted to both men and women to whatever degree that means they lie on the bisexual spectrum and are, in fact, bisexual. I’m not trying to force a label on anybody, that’s what the word means. I keep hearing bisexuals talk about the problems with biphobia/bierasure/bistereotypes but if bisexuals like yourself don’t action these issues then they wont be addressed.
alfred
“…….the vast majority of people from every generation still don’t believe in sexual fluidity.” Now you are being a little facetious, and I feel like this is bait from Mr Gremore to trigger the gays. Bi articles tend to get more comments and traffic, no? I’ll bite anyway. Love for you to point out the actual scientific evidence for this in men. Some studies suggest this to be the case with women, but they arent remotely conclusive and others have similar findings, but come to a different conclusion; that women dont HAVE a sexual orientation and that its situational (which is problematic to say the least in regards to lesbians….). Similar theory has come from this that men are visual, and women emotional in terms of attraction (thus more ‘elastic’). Queer media has picked this fluidity idea up with haste (due to the instance by bi advocacy groups; which are mainly made up of females. I should know, I have involved for a significant time), but it is based on very little evidence. Hey, it may be true and then thats great, but dont act like it is a FACT that old queens need to recognise. Sincerely; millennial former bi-activist, turned regular homo.
Jaxton
Women tend to resent male bisexuality because it dis-empowers women. It removes from women the power of consent.
This means that she can no longer use her ability to weaponize sexual consent in her relationship with a man if that man can opt into men for his sexual gratification.
In contrast, men tend to reward female bisexuality. Keep in mind that men have a pervasive, strong sex drive compared to women. This drives men to all sorts of fantasy and fetish scenarios where female bisexuality is a core element.
Problem is, women generally won’t consent to these scenarios unless they are paid. The woman turns herself into a bisexual prostitute in exchange for a rewatd.
A man will always reward a woman for faking her interest in sex, and she will gladly accept the reward if it means advancing her way through life.
Jaxton
As for the survey, be careful. If it’s not based on a random sample then it’s not worth the paper it’s written on.
In general, women are far less accepting of a male bisexual partner than men are of a female bisexual partner.
I’m not necessarily talking about practising sexuality, either. Even if a man has no intention of physically cheating on his wife with another man, she generally cannot cope with the simple idea that he has the ability to turn.
Women are very hypocritical in this regard.