Court Jester

Perry: I Don’t Think I’ve Ever Met This Lawrence V. Texas Fella

Republican prez nominee-wannabe, Strong man, and rumored closet case Rick Perry drew a blank this week when faced with the topic of Lawrence v. Texas, the landmark 2003 U.S. Supreme Court decision striking down state sodomy laws—which, er, rather heavily involved the state he governed at the time.

Perry was speaking to about 150 people in a Cedar Rapids coffee shop on Thursday, when he was asked how he reconciles his support of limited government with his criticism of Lawrence v. Texas.

After bumbling for a bit about out-of-control government spending, Perry responded: “You know, I wish I could tell you I know every Supreme Court case. I don’t. I’m not even going to try to go through every Supreme Court case. I’m not a lawyer.”

More Perry-esque fumbling ensued, and then this: “We can sit here and play ‘I gotcha’ questions on ‘What about this Supreme Court case?’ or whatever, but you know and I know that the problem in this country is spending in Washington, D.C. It’s not some Supreme Court case.”

Afterward, a reporter asked Perry if he actually knew what Lawrence v. Texas was. By now Perry had had enough: “My position on traditional marriage is clear and I don’t need a law. I don’t need a federal law case to explain it to me.”

Problem is, Perry is quite aware of the case, or at least he was until last year: He mentioned Lawrence v. Texas in his own 2010 book, Fed Up! Our Fight to Save America from Washington. And way back in 2002, when the Court took up the case, Perry had this to say: “I think our [anti-sodomy] law is appropriate that we have on the books.”

Maybe Perry isn’t up on sodomy rulings now because he’s too busy shoving his head up his ass?

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  • Seamus

    This douche Rick Rolls himself!

  • max

    Who cares, he will never president anyway.

  • christopher di spirito

    The pride of Texas. What a stupid son-of-a-bitch. But, the nitwits down yonder have elected this cretin three times. Go figure?

    As an aside, I learned the other day from a reader that most major employers in Texas don’t even offer Domestic Partner benefits.

    Texas: it really is a whole other country. Glad I don’t live there.

  • dvlaries

    Makes you think, if the Founding Fathers could speak today, they’d demand their graves were moved to Mars.

  • B

    Also Perry used the phrase “Tinker’s heck” (he couldn’t bring himself to use the actual idiom, “Tinker’s damn”. Curiously, Tinker’s Damn is the name of the oldest(?) gay bar in Santa Clara County, which starts some 30+ miles south of San Francisco.

    It would be fun to ask Perry if he used that phrase because he knew about the bar!

    Regarding No. 3, “Texas: it really is a whole other country.” It used to be another country and before that, it was part of Mexico. Can we cut them loose or give them back?
    Of course, with the attitudes there now, maybe Mexico wouldn’t want them!

  • Red Meat

    He should merry Katy Perry.

  • jason

    Oh, yes, darling Rick, with your cleverly designed dumb act, you are so sexy. Yes, I want to lick your hairy armpits, Rick. I want some of your designer dumbness to rub onto me, darling Rick. Ravish my apple breast with your big mouth, Ricky baby.

  • jason

    Don’t fall for the notion that Rick Perry is dumb. His dumbness is an act. Everything he does is an act.

  • pedro

    This idiot didn’t write a word of the book you are citing…As a poli-junkie, watching this guy in the debates, it’s very clear that his books were all ghost-written…He truly has no freaking idea what the hell Lawrence vs Texas is all about. He is a complete half-wit!

  • the crustybastard

    “I don’t need to know nothin’ bout no laws or cases to know how to fix ‘merica.”

    Sure. And you don’t need to know how to drive to be an excellent cabbie. Nitwit.

    Seriously, Texas. Seriously.

    It’s not funny anymore.

  • kawneekwa

    He right. They gots ta slow down the spendin’ so they be money left for him and his crew to steal.

  • Jim

    @jason: Luckily, it seems that he’ll be taking that act back to Texas with him before too long.

  • Elmwoodmac

    He’s at the Blue Strawberry Coffee Company coffee shop. How gay is that?

  • Olive Austin

    @B (#5) — Actually, the origin of the expression is “tinker’s dam” (no “n”), which was a ring of clay, mud, or other soft moldable material which a tinker would use to contain a spot or pool of molten metal being poured to repair a hole in a metal object or a gap in pipework. A “dam” is not obscene under any circumstances so Perry need not have avoided saying it.

  • B

    No. 14 · Olive Austin wrote, “@B (#5) — Actually, the origin of the expression is “tinker’s dam” (no “n”), which was a ring of clay,” Look up which points out that there was a preexisting phrase, “a tinker’s curse” – tinkers historically had a reputation for offensive language.

    The term “tinker’s damn” means something that is “insignificant or worthless” and more likely followed from the phrase “a tinker’s curse” although the entomology is not completely clear.

    Plus, of course, “A Tinker’s Damn” is in fact the name of a gay bar in Santa Clara. Might as well nail Perry for that have his Brokeback Mountain jacket! Besides, he
    did use “heck” because “damn” would probably offend his socially conservative Christian
    supporters – they get offended by just about everything.

  • Olive Austin

    @B (#15) — I don’t dispute that there’s a bar in Santa Clara by that name, but the etymology of the term diverges prior to 1877. The metalworker’s definition was in use in the renaissance, and maybe or maybe not originally in English. The word “tinker” dates from the 13th century and is of unknown (but European) origin, so that’s no help.

    The English-speaking population was a much smaller proportion of Europe than it is now, so English is less likely to be the language of origin than we might today assume; therefore, the English homophones “dam” and “damn” would not exist in a more-likely language of origin where the two words would not be homophones (and if they weren’t homophones then they wouldn’t be subject to the necessary misunderstanding).

    So, the most likely etymology of “tinker’s damn” was an English mistranslation of “tinker’s dam” sometime during or shortly after the renaissance, and from that point cultural drift brought it into popular mis-use (in English). No doubt it’s be re-translated back into the language of origin (whatever it is) with the new meaning.

    Somewhere a tinker shrugs.

  • MikeE

    @christopher di spirito: I suspect that Texas has many a village forced to do without its idiot during the Republican primaries…



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