At some point we’ve all fantasized about Superman being gay — you can’t nickname someone the Man of Steel without inviting a ton of homo innuendo — but 10 years ago, writer Peter David briefly introduced us to Gay Superman and, fittingly, he was super gay.
After being exposed to Pink Kryptonite, Superman appears to develop an eye for fashion and interior decoration, while flirting with that power bottom Jimmy Olsen.
“Did I ever tell you how smashing you look in bowties, Jimmy?” asks a possibly gay and possibly British Superman in Supergirl Vol 4, #79. “By the way that’s a fabulous window treatment you’ve put together.”
Couple things: A. Superman’s a twink chaser, with an affinity for gingers, so we can put those Batman fantasies to rest. B. That Pink Kryptonite must come equipped with flawless gaydar if Kal-El’s calling Jimmy out on those window treatments. And C. If this scenario wasn’t so goddamn ridiculous, we’d probably be more offended.
Sure it’s stepped in stereotype, but honestly, a Superman with a sense of fashion and a sensitive side sounds like the perfect man. And it would explain that ongoing thing he has with Lex Luthor…
So while we probably can’t expect Superman to get married to Jimmy (Lois Lane, ever the sport, will be the openly drunk maid of honor) and open up an antique shop in Provincetown with muscle bear couple, Wolverine and Hercules, as part of a crossover special authored by Harvey Fierstein — Fortress of Solitude, Plus One — at least we know that Pink Kryptonite’s the best Kryptonite.
Well, maybe besides Rainbow Kryptonite, which turns Superman into Pepper LaBeija:
Can we talk about that laser heat vision?
h/t: Gay Star News
Someone took care of the heat vision angle (NSFW)
I think the guy with the files over Lois’ shoulder in that picture is a member of the Tea Party.
@Captain proton: Wow, that quarterback has a fat dee.
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