Yesterday we heard the “only in puritanical America” news that Jessie Colter was given the boot from the Kentucky Kingdom Hurricane Bay water park, called a queer and threatened with arrest after his red swim briefs were deemed “inappropriate.”
Some Queerty commenters suggested that perhaps a staff member at the park recognized Jesse from his, ahem, acting career (re: porn), and that that’s what sparked the confrontation.
DarthKitsune aptly hypothesized:
Someone in charge recognized him as one hell of a hunky pornstar and got all uppity. ‘Nuff said. Kudos to Jesse for not having a total bitch fit and flipping the fuck out like I would have.
We’ll never know if that’s true or not of course, but in the case that it was, here’s the repressed and confused longing that may have gone through a closeted park employee’s head when he connected the dots.
Jessie, who describes himself on Twitter as a “plant nerd turned sex icon,” is certainly no stranger to making things grow.
Let’s get to know him, shall we?
Mind you, these are the photos we could show you. For lots more (definitely NSFW), head here.
Lvng1tor
I take back all of my “I could give a crap” statements abt porn performers…I care I care a lot..In fact, I’ve already cared 2x about this post!
TomMc
@Lvng1tor: Haha. I’m starting to care about this post, but because I cared about another one – somewhere else online – earlier, it’s hard to sustain interest.
Lvng1tor
@TomMc: a nap and a hot shower help
DarthKitsune
Jessie Colter is always welcome at my “waterpark”*
Waterpark is a euphemism for house.
vive
@Lvng1tor, lol, I can see why that ass would be deemed illegal!
hotshot70
the waterpark should have just made it adults only day. Imagine how many gay men and horny women would show up to see his “package”
stranded
Doubt it, if he was recognized but wearing board shorts, he wouldn’t have gotten kicked out. We sexualize men’s bodies as much as we do women and therefore find them “dirty”
Reid Condit
Was that waterpark really in Kentucky? Does Jessie Colter have an ol’ Kentucky home? Come back little Jessie, back to Folsom St. where real men wear jocks!
Lvng1tor
@vive: Up against the wall and spread em!
Thad1527
Maybe he was kicked out of the waterpark for smoking?
vive
@Lvng1tor, the charge is felony ass!
jel1955
So, I actually wrote Kentucky Kingdom to find out what they say happened with Jessie. What I received in response to my questions follows:
Hi James,
Speedo-type swimsuits are allowed at Kentucky Kingdom and Hurricane Bay. There is a fine line between inappropriate swimwear and a competitive-swimming style Speedo. Competitive-swimming style Speedos are certainly allowed.
However, male thongs are not allowed and anyone who fashions their Speedo into a male thong will be in violation of dress code.
Also, to clarify, this man was not kicked out of the water park. He was asked not to fashion his Speedo inappropriately and if he would not comply, he would be asked to leave. The situation did not escalate to this.
We thank for you giving us the opportunity to clarify this situation, as not everything you read on the internet is always true.
Thanks,
Kentucky Kingdom
TomMc
@Lvng1tor: I have now tested your theory on multiple occasions, and you are correct.
Yet, the combined effect…
In short; a hot, wet nap works best.
BlogShag
Have you seen what most look like in Kentucky while wearing Speedos? There’s your answer as to why he was kicked out of the water park.
He should sue their asses.
I'm Black, and HIV-Positive.
He’s my “it” boy!
Gigi Gee
The man is smoking hot.
LiamCregg
I don’t think that an employee reckognized him, the speedo *may* have been a clue, IDK. There’s a waterpark near Austin, Tx ‘Schlitterbahn’ that is notorious for kicking out gay and lesbian couples/groups.