Queen of the Damned

Polish Priests Examining “The Woman Who Dares Call Herself Madonna” For Demonic Possession

A gaggle of concerned priests are holding a five-day conference in Poland on the subject of exorcisms. Topics on the agenda include the “current fashion for vampirism in Europe,” “the devil’s deceit during exorcism,”–and Madonna.

The iconic pop star’s music and shows will be examined by “expert” priests trained in the art of defeating demons and treating satanic possession, as well as looking for the devil and finding evil in popular culture.

“Part of the conference is dedicated to the hidden subliminal message in communication, and the choice of this subject was inspired by the woman who dares to call herself Madonna,” exorcist and conference organizer Father Andrzej Grefkowic told The Telegraph last week. “We’ve been worried about her concerts.”

Worried about her concerts? Madonna’s last tour wrapped in 2012.

At least Father Andrzej Grefkowic’s is in line with tradition. The Catholic Church is not known for keeping up with the times.

Just to show that Madonna is in good company, the good Father also issued a warning that tattoos and body piercings are methods the devil uses to corrupt people. He also urged everyone to be mindful of things like horoscopes and magic shows.

We reached out to Madonna’s camp for a comment, but didn’t hear back; however, we’d imagine her response would be something along the lines of: “Polish exorcists? What?”

Approximately 300 exorcists and other specialists are expected to attend the conference, which is held every two years, at the Jasna Gora monastery, the most holy site in Poland.

Sounds to us like these dudes just want an excuse to jam out to Get Into The Groove.

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  • oilburner

    Ugh ! I hate VADGE she almost as annoying as people assuming that if you are then you must be a fan of Madonna which I’m. not at all

  • 2eo



  • ZeeZee

    hahaha, is this a joke? ‘cos I couldn’t stop laughing reading this article. Poor
    —back to laughing :)

  • Ellipse Kirk

    I’m not a huge Madonna fan, but are these folks really so detached as to think it unusual for a person to call themselves by the name given to them at birth by their parents. Oh, right, priests, no reality check in place.

  • Redpalacebulleaglesox

    Madonna was the name given her at birth, Madonna Louise Chiccione if I’m not mistaken. Where do we find these folks?

  • Adam

    You may not know that, but Father Andrzej Grefkowic IS up to date with his “worries about her concerts”.

    In Poland we have a huge scandal about public money (over 1k EUR) spend on her last tour in our country. So huge, that our Minister of Sports and Tourism is almost about to resign, and this is the main argument for the opposition party to show how weak and corrupted our goverment is. There are no weekly news without this topic… :/

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