WATCH: Priest Raps “Yes To You,” No To Gay

In a video that allegedly presents the Church as “a refuge of love for all of humanity,” Father Claude Dusty Burns, a.k.a. “Pontifex,” lays down some not-so-fresh verses about how homosexuality is a choice. Though the Church might say no to gay marriage, it says “yes to you.”

As long as “you” keep it in your pants.

A spoken-word piece, “Yes to You” is produced by Courage, a Catholic ministry that teaches that individuals “dealing with same-sex attractions” need to “experience the freedom of interior chastity and in that freedom find the steps necessary to living a fully Christian life in communion with God and others.” (That’s in contrast to Dignity, the LGBT-affirming Catholic group, FYI)

MC Pontifex raps:

“In a culture that glorifies sex and puts pleasure before all else / Is God the source of your identity or is it your sexual self? / And how do we identify and not accept a lie / Because sexual desire is just one piece of the pie / Identity is a choice, a lifestyle is something you embrace / Same-sex attraction doesn’t define you and can be set in place/ A movement with semantics aimed to change and sway/ There needs to be clarification when using the word ‘gay’ / Does it mean one has attractions, or they choose to act them out? / Truth says there’s a difference between the two that needs to be brought about.”

Catchy, right?

We guess it’s okay to teach acceptance if it means denying an innate part of yourself. Then again, a priest may not be the best person to talk to about “same-sex attractions.” At times like these, we like to defer to that other Bible, Clueless. To quote Taj,Why should I listen to you, anyway? You’re a virgin who can’t droive?”