Queer Questions: Hairy Situation

Dear Queer Questions,

I’m dating a young blogger and no matter how many times I ask him not to, he keeps shaving his chest. What’s a sensitive way I can get the little bastard to conform to my wishes?

Signed,
Glabrous isn’t Glamorous

Dear GIG,

Well the real issue here is the fact that you are dating a blogger! By definition they are self-obsessed and controlling so you have a battle ahead of you. But do not fret. We have the answer.

There is a compromise. Perhaps you can agree on trimming, or manscaping. This will keep his hair under control while saving you from his sandpaper stubble. Shaving does not need to be to the skin. A trimmed chest looks 100 times better than a bare chest covered in razor bumps. Look to Tom Ford for inspiration. He was a huge fan of the hairy chest and made it sexy during his reign at Gucci.

You may also want to start watching 70’s porn. Get your boyfriend all hot and hard by watching all these hairy guys go at it. He obviously is not seeing enough positive images of guys with hairy chests. This could be a way to show him that hairy guys are hot too.

Hoping for Hair,
Queerty Queers