Queerty Goes Deep

Queerty’s resident philosophers have been pondering the question of God’s sexual orientation. While some assert that God had a son, and allege that as proof of his heterosexuality, others are waiting to see the DNA test results. Furthermore, this past Saturday evening in a backroom in Roxy, a tweaked out club kid having sex claimed to have seen God.

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Was God really at the Roxy this past Saturday? He wasn’t seen any place else, which lends credibility to the sighting. Of course, there is no law stating that a straight dude can’t go to the Roxy on a Saturday, though you’d swear there were.

Yet Queerty has more evidence that God is a weenie-craving homo. His creation of the earth led directly to the production of Broadway musicals. And he provided Cuisinarts to facilitate our lovely dinner parties. So Queerty has a message for all those bigoted Baptists who say that a play about Matthew Shepard is “spitting in God’s face;” don’t worry, we’ve already cleaned God up with a Neutrogena facial cloth, and his complexion is go-on-a-date perfect. If you don’t already know the joke about the nun and the bus driver, go here.

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