Queerty Query: Bryan Boy

bryan boy

We once described the blogger Bryan Boy like this: “Paris Hilton has been reincarnated as a gay, Asian twink.” We had special Queerty reporter Randy Kaufman track Bryan down to chat about fashion, Manila, and Nan Kempner.

Hi Bryan how’s it going over there!
It’s shitty. I just got back from my weekend vacation el tropicale style and I’m still in recovery.

First of all, I wanted to let you know that I love your blog and read it everyday. It’s so over the top. Have you always loved fashion? 

People always assume I always loved fashion or I’m a fashionista… I don’t/I’m not. I’m not really obsessed with fashion; I’m obsessed with SHOPPING though. I shop for things that I want… and love – I don’t give a shit whether it looks good on me or not.

I love shopping more than anything…it’s the great equalizer… they don’t care if you are black or white or third world or gay or have a second head…as long as you have money! Which we all assume you do. Where does it all come from? Do you work? Is stuff just cheaper in Manila?
A gold digger-in-training will never reveal her financial resources. No, I don’t work. I used to pretend and say “I work” just to sound respectable…. and then I realized shit, nobody believes I’m a funeral director by day and a fluffer by night, so why pretend? Besides, I’ve always thought “work” is something for the little people. Most things are indeed cheaper in Manila. There’s a ton of good finds and bargains here. However, I’d say skip this hideous cesspit of the third world if you’re looking for designer goodies… it’s always best to fly first class to Europe if you want to max out your plastic.

For those who don’t know about your blog you are somewhat of an unexpected fashion icon – someone still willing to take some risks and be a self-described label whore. Who are some of your must haves? 

I wouldn’t consider myself as a fashion icon. If anything, I’m fashion road kill. Piling everything up into this inimitable, gigantic mess is fun. Fashion is about taking risks, trying things on and making mistakes… I hate polished and stiff looks… soo pretentious. I like to mix and match the high and the low and give a good attitude to match. Who are my must haves? Goyard, Chanel, Hermes, Yves Saint Laurent and Marni. For 2006 I’m gonna try my best to stay away from all things logo-a-gogo… except Goyard of course. I feel like I’m starting to dress Hollywood trash with all the Dior and Vuitton that I have.

After the jump Bryan Boy lets us know who he wants to be.

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Awful. Hollywood can be the most tragic fashion place on earth. People eat logos for dinner. Paris however is how it should be done. You recently were there for a few weeks. Share with us your thoughts on Paris (and by Paris I mean France, not Hilton) 

Paris is definitely one of my favorite cities. It’s so beautiful, glamorous and trash at the same time. It’s the perfect place in the world to pomp it up with arrogance, get dressed to the nines, put on the high-voltage attitude and get fucked in a sketchy alleyway with a well-hung guy. Everything is just beautiful… even if you have dried cum stains on your mouth while wearing your best J. Mendel chinchilla. Also, it’s the only city in the world where boys… gorgeous boys… stop me while walking on the street just to tell me how “exotique” and beautiful I am. I love those French motherfuckers. Seriously. Never in my life I’ve been chased by boys just to know my name.

You also just recently went to Stockholm, which I’m planning on going to this summer…what was that like?
Stockholm is amazing! If I were to get married now and have kids, this city is where I’d chose to live and raise my spawn. Swedes in general are painfully good-looking, friendly… and shy, which is a good thing for someone as outré as me. Everything in Stockholm is clean, civilized and WELL-DESIGNED. Visiting Stockholm was quite humbling. It taught me that some of the simplest things in life can ALSO make you happy.

You have fans all around the world, and they all send in pictures doing the infamous Bryan Boy pose…. what’s the funniest or strangest fan email you have received?
The strangest one has got to be from this jealous Filipino stalker who told me he’d be carrying a bottle of hydrochloric acid (a highly-corrosive, industrial-strength chemical they use for cleaning bathroom floors) with him all the time so when he see me, he’d pour it all over my face… and I’ll be permanently scarred for life. It’s not my fault that I’m beautiful. It’s not my fault that I’m nouveaux riche. I love getting threatening emails like that. I eat them for lunch. The more hate mails I get, the more I fulfill my purpose in life, which is to make people feel terrible (about themselves).

Acid, like in Female Trouble… that’s awful! Is it tough being gay in Manila? What’s the scene like over there? 

I don’t think it’s tough being gay in Manila. Filipino people in general are very tolerant and accepting of gay people. What I really hate though is the rampant internal homophobia going on. Manila used to be a colorful city where drag queens, flamers and camp boys thrive… lovely characters in their own right. But for the past few years, all these nasty “straight-acting” pratts are invading the city with their steroids and gym memberships. Next thing you know, it’s trendy to become masculine again. I have to admit I’m not really into the gay scene. It’s soo ghetto and trash. Let’s face it, nobody wants to sleep with anyone whose got a limp wrist (repeat after me mother fuckers: NO FATS, NO FEMS, NO ASIANS) these days… so why even bother going to the gay clubs (at least in Manila). The best thing I like about this city is the fact that straight, gay and bisexual people mix well together so the places that I hit are that of the “polysexual” kind.

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Do you read any blogs? 

Yes, I read blogs if time permits or if there’s something interesting going on in my Sitemeter (hah!). I don’t “read” as in “read”. I like to look at pictures. I’m more of a picture person. I do check Queerty, Pink, Gawker and Perez Hilton (amongst others) from time to time.

What are some of your favorite fashion dos and don’ts? Any advise for the gays that you would like to share? 

Reduce calorie intake, smoke like a chimney, purge like Lindsay Lohan and snort lots of cocaine. Just be thin for god’s sake! Enough of this muscle Mary madness. Save the muscles for porn stars. There is nothing more gorgeous than a TTT (thin tanned thing). That would be my best fashion advice. Anything will look good, whether it’s a potato sack or a bubble wrap top, when you’re thin.

Who do you love or admire in Hollywood?
I have a love/hate affair with Paris Hilton. I don’t know what it is. Perhaps it’s because we’re both trash and we both love it. I like Mischa Barton’s effortless style. Thing is, I’m anything but effortless. Fuck Hollywood. There’s only one woman in this world I want to be and her name is Nan Kempner.


I love her too! Total Glamour! Do you still have your monkey, and how did you get one?
It’s not my monkey!!!! It was one of those tourist trap attractions in Moscow’s red square. You pay something like a dollar to get a photo taken with it. Poor, poor animals. I do have a faux/stuff toy monkey though, given to me by my friends at Motorola over the weekend. It even has my name on its tag that says, “I belong to Bryan”.

One last question. What are your plans for 2006? Please say you’ll be visiting us at Queerty here in New York! 

I’ll do my best to visit NYC – I promise!!! These days, I’m busy working on a book project… with nothing but my pictures on it — a glorified photo album. I also want to visit several countries I’ve never been before. Other than that, I’ll continue to spread the word of love, vanity and self-pity to the rest of the world.