JINGLE BALLS

Santa Who? Iceland’s Spicy Yule Lads Come Early and Stay Long

While silly American gays wait around on tenterhooks for that same old overdressed fat daddy to plop in for a microsecond and deem them naughty or nice, Iceland’s kinky Yule Lads have already started arriving, and they’ll keep on coming daily till Christmas. (And there’s no uncomfortable tinge of racism to deal with, unlike The Netherlands’ Sambo-esque Zwarte Piet.)

Beginning every December 12, the Yule Lads (or Jólasveinar) commence sneaking into Icelandic towns one at a time—Stubby (Stúfur) arrived yesterday and Spoon Licker (Þvörusleikir) is on tap for today.

Things get especially tantalizing around December 20 with the arrival of Sausage Snatcher (Bjúgnakrækir), followed by Window Peeper (Gluggagægir), Doorway Sniffer (Gáttaþefur), and Meat Hooker (Ketkrókur).

Each of the thirteen Yule Lads sticks around town for twelve days—dropping the odd gift or potato in children’s shoes—before heading back to the countryside, where they all presumably live together in one big dark and steamy cave.

Gleðileg jól!