MALE BONDING

Science Explains Why So Many Straight Dudes Fantasize About Having Gay Sex Together

464722601We already know that straight guys are a lot more bisexual than people think. We also know that they secretly get off on watching gay porn. But we never knew exactly why. Until now.

new study out of the University of Portsmouth in England has uncovered why some straight dudes have gay sex fantasies, and it all boils down to a little thing called progesterone.

Progesterone is a hormone that appears in both males and females and contributes to the formation of social bonds. Researchers found that when hetero guys are reminded of the importance of forging male friendships, they report an increased willingness to engage in sexual behavior with other guys.

The levels of progesterone were measured in the saliva of 59 males. Then, each men was randomly assigned to one of three groups and asked to complete word puzzles: one using friendship words, one using sexual words, and a third using neutral words.

Afterwards, men who were asked to complete the friendship word puzzle showed 26 percent greater homoerotic motivation than men given the sexual or neutral puzzles. Moreover, men with the highest progesterone levels who were given the friendship puzzle showed 41 percent greater homoerotic motivation compared to men with the highest progesterone levels in the other two groups.

Researchers concluded that gay thoughts go hand in hand with the need to create alliances with members of the same sex, which can be traced all the way back to the teamwork mentalities of the earliest hunter-gatherers.

“From an evolutionary perspective we tend to think of sexual behavior as a means to an end for reproduction,” Dr. Diana Fleischman, the report’s author, said. “However, because sexual behavior is intimate and pleasurable, it is also used in many species, including non-human primates, to help form and maintain social bonds. We can all see this in romantic couples who bond by engaging in sexual behavior even when reproduction is not possible.”

Fleischman continued: “Having some degree of attraction to the opposite sex is a type of adaptive behavior, and in any adaptive behavior you will see extremes of the spectrum, hence some people will only be attracted to members of the same sex.”

Ultimately, Fleischman said, “the research suggests that having exclusively heterosexual thoughts is a disadvantage — it’s better to be a little bit attracted to the opposite sex.”

Related stories:

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Just How Unusual Are Your Sexual Fantasies? This Study Will Tell You.

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Graham Gremore is a columnist and contributor for Queerty and Life of the Law. Follow him on Facebook and Twitter.

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83 Comments

  • QJ201

    Progesterone roofies for everyone!

  • Trippy

    Seems like every few weeks, the powers that be drop another story on us about straight guys secretly hoping for, fantasizing about, or in search of some quick and sweaty man-on-man stuff. Really?

    I’m more concerned with why some of them still want to kill us, jail us, or beat the crap out of us. Maybe all these bored scientists can focus a little more on that issue for a while.

  • vive

    This sounds a bit ridiculous. Since when is progesterone a marker for same-sex attraction?

  • Blackceo

    I wish science would explain why Queerty seems to have this obsession with what “straight” guys are doing sexually.

    I mean I get the whole “oooo can I conquer this straight guy and turn him to our team” thing. But I got news for you darlin….he was gay before u and your “magoc spells” came along. He just didn’t have anyone to be gay with.

  • orrine

    @vive: It’s not a marker, it’s level correlates with same-sex attraction

  • vive

    @orrine: “[Progesterone]’s not a marker, it’s level correlates with same-sex attraction.”

    That’s what a marker is. And the fact that such a correlation has never been observed before makes me very suspicious of this report, since hormonal correlations have pretty consistently been ruled out in previous studies of same sex attraction. It’s like the first thing people checked.

  • aliengod

    Shocking! Another nonsense article on Queerty. Straight guys don’t fantasize about sex with other men!

  • Paco

    I thought the idea of hormones playing a role in our sexual orientation was debunked years ago. Oh well Queerty, keep trying, some day you may actually convince us that straight guys want to bang us rather than put us in the hospital with banged up faces.

  • Cam

    Or they’re closet bisexuals or gay guys.

    Sheesh.

  • DonW

    Having had sex with more than one straight man who was “experimenting,” I can tell you it was boring and unsatisfying. I like self-assured gay men who are passionately, unapologetically into mansex — and who can joyfully fall in love with another man. Stop peddling fantasies about the unattainable and, ultimately, uninteresting.

  • BelleRules

    @DonW: Did straight men who were “experimenting” like it? As your opinion what percentage of straight guys actually had tried sex with other man by their own choice? Do you think the ones who had are hiding the fact? And if they are hiding it – WHY?
    I respect gay guys for a fact of being open about their sexuality.

  • lykeitiz

    Articles like this one are EXACTLY why I don’t visit this site as often as I used to.

    @aliengod: Exactly @Cam: Exactly @Trippy: Exactly @Blackceo: and Exactly!

    Grow up, Queerty.

  • Stache99

    @DonW: That’s because you have a healthy mature way of looking at it. I’ve done it and it ain’t all that. What is the point of being with someone that’s got to be fucked up and then ashamed later. If all you want to do is blow some non interactive drunk have at it.

    However, getting with straight guys seems to be a gay porn favorite. The more the guy acts disgusted or just uninterested the more desirable they are. I’d rather watch paint dry.

  • Stache99

    I wonder if there’s any straight guy sites devoted to hooking up with gay guys. Nope didn’t think so. Apparently there’s still allot of shame with gay men. For allot straight still = better. Examples like this or guys that have “straight acting” in the online profiles. It’s all the same.

  • Vallin

    A-a-a-a-nd THEN there are my CD-sissy-fembois…Oh SWEET LUV, MMMMM-YESSSS};)!

  • dazzer

    Just to put this study in perspective…

    The University of Portsmouth isn’t one of the ‘great’ universities in the UK. However, it has had a long and respected reputation in social sciences – especially in sociology – since the time it was a polytechnic, rather than university, back in the 1980s.

    As a social or ‘hard’ science study, this isn’t worth too much.

    That said, the University of Portsmouth is not filled with stupid professors or students.

    In academic terms, the researchers are putting down a marker for future research – either by themselves or by researchers elsewhere.

    What Fleischman has thrown out here is a possibility rather than a hard-and-fast theory. It plays to Portsmouth’s hard-earned reputation for solid social science research and tries to put it in the context of the ‘harder’ sciences.

    There’s every chance that Portsmouth has come up with a new theory to explain why homosexuality is not an evolutionary dead-end in terms of strict Darwinian theory (something that has already been explained by a lot of sociobiological theory), but there’s not enough evidence one way or another at the moment to say whether the researchers are correct.

  • Maude

    IMO,
    Speaking scientifically, in my opinion, bisexuality has been the norm since we discovered how good it feels.

  • RevJim

    “From an evolutionary perspective…”

    I could care less about “evolutionary” perspectives. However, from the Biblical perspective, this verifies that if the Almighty created mankind He therefore also created progesterone and its affects as described in this article.
    -Rev. Jim Cunningham
    GayChristianSurvivors.com

  • Aranos

    While it’s nothing new that sex has evolved towards a social bonding tool in many species whose individuals would have a difficult time surviving alone – like humans (our current norm, life-long monogamous heterosexuality, being unnatural), but this study is interesting nonetheless, as it confirms the field studies and statistics done by behavioral scientists and proves once again the social function of sex.

  • RevJim

    @DonW: “Having had sex with more than one straight man who was “experimenting,” I can tell you it was boring and unsatisfying. I like self-assured gay men who are passionately, unapologetically into mansex — and who can joyfully fall in love with another man.”

    I see, so what you are saying is that you only want to be with male whores who have been with so many other guys that they can give you professional sex.

  • Captain Obvious

    Does anyone over 25 actually believe this garbage? I don’t get why this myth is being pushed so hard by gay media.

    The boring sexual fluidity argument seems to only exist on the internet and I’m glad for that. Everyone else is pretty much at the point where after a certain age you should know what you’re into and it doesn’t need to be announced every time you decide to explore a new avenue for funsies.

  • RevJim

    @Aranos: I agree. It explains why there is so much homoeroticism among straight men in fraternities, the military and prisons and pretty much all other male bonding scenarios. As far as I am concerned “male bonding” in and of itself is homoerotic. I’ve never had to “bond” with other guys in order to work with them or get along with them. Male bonding is purely an excuse for heterosexual male/male intimacy at a paper-thin distance. Anyone ever notice that despite their constant female sex talk, straight guys only like to be around other guys? That’s one of women’s greatest complaints against their men – the guys always want to spend more time with each other than with their females.

  • Sansacro

    This rings 100% true with my experience.

    The homoerotic and gay experiences I have had with straight-identifed guys is always contextual and bonding based.

    That said: more men have bisexual feelings throughout their lives and in various contexts than our heterocentric and identity-cateogry obsessed society can either face or admit. So let’s just start by stop categorizing these men as straight but as existing within a bi-spectrum. And guess, what, a lot of self-idenified gay guys also exist with that spectrum at various stages of their lives.

    Sexual identity politics is sooooo f3*((king boring.

  • jason smeds

    Men have sex for recreational reasons. Apart from sex, recreation can mean anything that brings you pleasure, from going on a vacation to playing sports etc etc.

    Men have always recreated together. If this includes sex, so be it. The only thing that stops straight-identifying men from having more sex with each other is women. Women don’t like the idea of homosexual attraction in men who are also attracted to women.

    Women have historically put the brakes on male homosexual behaviour in men who are also attracted to women.

  • John

    Today’s trade is tomorrow’s competition.

  • Paco

    Please don’t confuse homosocial behavior with homoerotic. If you are sexualizing non-sexual events or behaviors, then it is only homoerotic in your own head. Just because you enjoy fapping to guys being casually social with one another doesn’t make it anything more than that.

    I really wish Queerty would stop pushing the idea that homosexuality is a choice. Those “straight” guys that do experiment will be the first ones to proclaim that it is a choice and will be held up as examples by our enemies as proof we can choose to not be gay.

  • RevJim

    @Captain Obvious: you are clearly not aware of the astronomical amount of same-gender sex that heterosexual men engage in. They aren’t in it for the love and romance, as a homosexual can be, but merely for the “fun” and kinkiness of it.

  • Saint Law

    @Captain Obvious: You may not be aware of this, you almost certainly aren’t, but you’re so stupid you’d have to sit an exam just to qualify as a moron.

    A very very simple exam obviously.

  • Roan

    @vive:

    Please do get back to us once you’ve completed your own study and published the findings. I know I speak for many when I say we’re on the edge of our seats with anticipation.

  • Saint Law

    @jason smeds: Most men don’t sleep with men because they’re attracted to women, and of those that do very few will sleep with you because you’re an insane fug.

    Hope this helps.

  • RevJim

    Straight guys don’t fornicate with each other because they are attracted to the same sex, but because the male body is simply awesome. It is, after all, made in God’s image. It’s just such a pity that straight guys have such an addiction to hurting, harming, maiming, destroying and killing other guys.

  • jason smeds

    Homosocial behaviour amongst straight-identifying men is important because it binds them together. Shared sexual fetishes, desires and even mutual masturbation is common amongst such men. They know each other in a very intimate way but they do NOT aim to have sexual intercourse with each other. In fact, such intercourse is a breach of trust.

    This desire to bond is important because it maintains the male sense of virility. This sense of virility exists in all men except for those who identify as gay.

    One of the homosocial rites of passage for straight-identifying men is to take part in gang-bangs where they all fill a woman at the same time. Here, they prove to each other their individual virility and their virility as a whole. It’s a very important part of the signal system wherein one man signals to another that he is “one of the boys”.

    I even heard of a father and son who bonded in this way over women. Of course, I didn’t say anything.

  • Charli Girl

    AND ONCE AGAIN ALL ABOUT THE MALES! UGH WHERE’S THE FEMALE SCIENTIST?

  • Paco

    @Charli Girl: females were include. There is a less twisted reporting of the article at Huffpo.

  • Silas Wegg

    @jason smeds: Was it women alone who halted the halcyon days of male-on-male ancient Greek action? I think you’re oversimplifying (and I doubt you understand or care). Social evolution during that loooong expanse from then to now has reprogrammed mens’ minds.

    Perhaps you live in a petri dish of an area where special circumstances have led to an usually high concentration of sexual aberrations.

  • Desert Boy

    Hot straight guys are da’ bomb.

  • I'm Black, and HIV-Positive.

    “the research suggests that having exclusively heterosexual thoughts is a disadvantage — it’s better to be a little bit attracted to the opposite sex.”

    Typical Queerty. You contradicted yourself in the last line again. You meant in conclusion that: “it’s better to be a little bit attracted to the same sex!” as a result of the findings.

  • Curtispsf

    I will not. I will not. I will not. I will not. I will not.

    I will not Click on another Queerty: “Straight guys want gay sex” article.

    I’m getting a hot straight boy for Christmas. Under the tree. I’ll let you know how

    things go, Queerty, and then you can extrapolate and cite my study as definitive

    proof of what straight men want.

  • BelleRules

    @RevJim: Have you even seen God or at least a picture of him? I don’t think so. I respect you have an opinion,but the part about men r created in God’s image is based absolutely on nothing because there is no proof of his existence on a first place. And because you sounded like a sexist, I will ask you what do you think about 7 sins? I can remind you one of them:
    Leviticus 20:13 ESV
    If a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination; they shall surely be put to death; their blood is upon them.

    And I disagree on straight guys have an addiction to hurting, harming, maiming, destroying and killing other guys.

    Anyways, my point is people who kill and harm others can be any sexuality,sex,age,race and believes. And we can’t judge or discriminate anyone just because – just because we got trapped under somebody’s opinion and simply not being intelligent and open minded enough.

    Btw,I love,enjoy and adore real men with passion.And as a sex partner I would always and only prefer a man.Never even considered just out of curiosity having sex with a female. Maybe because I am a woman myself :).my point is even still I find a beautiful naked girl’s body way attractive then gorgeous naked man’s body.It is the penis that make such a difference. It makes a guy look sort of aggressive comparing to a girls body.And guys who have small ones would make me feel bad for them. But once again, it is all about what we like.

  • BelleRules

    @Charli Girl: What exactly do you want to know? I can answer your questions :).

    I am kinda glad scientist are focused on men more and left us alone :).And there is always a reason behind everything.

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  • blackberry finn

    Do gay men fantasize about women in certain hormonal environments?

  • BelleRules

    @Arconcyyon: Dude, can you teach me the language of nonsense please!

  • wade22

    What a stupid article and moreover a stupid and senseless study. If I fantasize about being raped by six men it is only that, a fantasy, as I know I REALLY DO NOT WANT that to happen. Likewise if a str8 guy fantasizes over another guy it is only that, a fantasy. In other words, when it comes down to reality, we all do only what is natural to ourselves.

  • Greg

    @Arconcyyon: WTF is this? Waste of time writing that out. It’s probably only decipherable to Latka Gravas and/or Jar Jar Binks.

  • Greg

    @RevJim: Straight guys who fornicate with each other aren’t really straight. Is “straight identifying” the new way of saying “in denial” or “delusional”? I’m not saying that men having sex with each other is wrong or bad, but come on, they are more likely bisexual. They sure aren’t completely heterosexual. They should try to figure that one out. Why certain men who have sex with other men for whatever reason need to self identify as “straight”.

  • MarionPaige

    The consistent / persistent “foundation” of western thought about the human brain is that it functions like a computer. something which pretty much negates all studies and theories about the human brain from western “theorists”. It’s like,

    How many of you can consciously regulate your heart rates and body temperatures? Something which actually is humanly possible. When you have the “given” that it is humanly possible to consciously control one’s heart rate, it becomes so much of a joke to debate the “motivations” one needs for an erection.

  • jason smeds

    We don’t need a female point of view on this. Females don’t have the constant or compelling sexual drive of men. They are the least qualified to be discussing a genuine sexuality such as male sexuality.

    Yes, women are qualified in certain things, such as pretending to be sexual in order to obtain the approval of others. They are qualified to discuss the selling of sexual favors in exchange for rewards, for that is how many women operate.

    But I’m certainly not going to tolerate women who pretend they know everything about sexuality, particularly that of men.

  • Nixter

    @jason smeds: Ganbang as a role model for male sexuality??!! Disgustinng and ridiculous. Both gay and straight.

  • BelleRules

    @jason smeds: I you have a fixed idea in your head of a particular type of people or things,it doesn’t mean you are right.

  • grero

    The usual nonsense. “Straight” men like having sex with men… that can’t be, so what excuse can we make up for “straight” men having sex with other men? It’s hormones or something! How about we acknowledge the fact that most men before Christianity had sex with other men… and culture then represses innate bisexuality in men? Read more about that in Chapter 7 and 8 of Grero: http://grero.com/#_Toc347564543

  • grero

    @Captain Obvious: “The boring sexual fluidity argument seems to only exist on the internet and I’m glad for that.”

    Sexual flexibility may be repressed today, but it was the norm before Christianity. 18 out of 20 Roman emperors had boyfriends for example: http://grero.com/#_Toc347564531

    @jason smeds: “Women have historically put the brakes on male homosexual behaviour in men who are also attracted to women.”

    And Christianity.

    • Arconcyyon

      thanks very is thanks !

  • tricky ricky

    I think this researcher is a joke and her conclusions farcical. I think she resents men’s attraction to women and wants the women all to herself. and it’s a good thing for that adaptive behavior. if men had always felt comfortable having sex with other men it’s all they would have done and civilization would never have started and gays would never have had the time to create culture. plus we would be woefully under populated.

  • tricky ricky

    @grero: they had sex with boys.

  • tricky ricky

    @Charli Girl: the reports author IS a woman. how many guys do you know named Diana?

  • tricky ricky

    59 males split into 3 groups? that’s 19.6 men per group. randomly assigned to do word puzzles. there is no way no how any type of conclusion can be drawn using this slapdash farce of a study. the methodology is pathetic.

  • tricky ricky

    I missed an important point in the article. these guys weren’t straight, they were british. explains everything.

    • Arconcyyon

      hey [email protected] is and @bellesrulees thanks is ! I´m is like the site ciety is @bellesrulles show is belive the best fashion imformaty people .

  • grero

    @tricky ricky: Ganymede by tradition was 17 when he was Zeus’s lover. Now, that’s a story but still reflects the culture at large. Having sex with 17-year-olds is not to be confused with having sex with 7-year-olds.

  • BadSeed

    Having read through all the comments, I don’t have the sense there’s a whole lot self-identified gay men can agree upon. What else is new?

  • BadSeed

    @I’m Black, and HIV-Positive.: No, I think Queerty meant its conclusion: Social solidarity among men requires same-sex attraction, but species propagation demands some heterosexual attraction, but not to the degree that it has come to dominate our cultural discourse until recently. Fortunately what Gore Vidal called “the heterosexual dictatorship” is crumbling and will continue to do so, absent a Fascist backlash a la Putin. As women achieve greater freedom, so will straight men and there will be fewer of them. Contrary to what l/g politicians would like us all to believe, homosexuality is at least socially contagious.

  • grero

    @BadSeed: “socially contagious.” I wish I thought of this phrase! :-)

  • BelleRules

    @grero: Agree 100%. I think it isn’t just Christianity,but Religion in general that confuses people making homosexuality look evil.

    But if to think rationally about it – being a good moral person is not about who you are fucking,but about not fucking others over.

  • BelleRules

    @grero: Is there at least one man out there who has never had sex with other man?

  • lawn1

    @jason smeds:

    “We don’t need a female point of view on this. Females don’t have the constant or compelling sexual drive of men. They are the least qualified to be discussing a genuine sexuality such as male sexuality.

    Yes, women are qualified in certain things, such as pretending to be sexual in order to obtain the approval of others. They are qualified to discuss the selling of sexual favors in exchange for rewards, for that is how many women operate.”

    Oh honey, do you even know any females? Your ignorance breaks my heart.

  • Celtic

    @Trippy: Both psychologists and psychiatrists have somewhat widely concluded the hostility some straight men show toward gay men is the result of repressed sexual desires that puts the ‘fear of God’ in them. Self-described straight men who are secure in their own sexuality get along quite well with gay men. I know this from experience. Sadly, the men who hold so much hate and intolerance toward homosexuals were repressed from an early age, and most often are found in strict religious families and communities. Those men are the same ones who consistently and constantly vilify and demonize gays. There also are gay men who possess such a strong fear of being found out, they join the gay haters club.

  • vive

    @wade22: “If I fantasize about being raped by six men it is only that, a fantasy, as I know I REALLY DO NOT WANT that to happen.”

    Maybe YOU don’t ;)

    • Celtic

      @BadSeed: Your post is fascinating in that it represents much of what was the case before organized religion enter into this fray, with Christian and Muslim religions being the most hostile toward homosexuality. Yet, those hostilities are ill-founded. Vidal’s point is spot on, but somewhat overlooks how many “heterosexual” men sneak off into the woods at night or over the next door neighbor’s to get their booty poked or whatever else they seek sexually. Than Ancient Celts, my distant ancestors, held women and men as equals where the male and the female each had same-sex lovers.

      A friend who was a Deacon in the RC Church once remarked that he believes there is so much violence against women among straight men because of their denial to have sex with other men. This notion that if one is a straight male who enjoys gay sex from time to time then makes the straight man gay is pure nonsense.

      As a 70 year-old gay man who came out 46 years ago this last summer, I spent quite a large amount of time reading about homosexuality in order to “cure” my own anxieties about being gay. A straight doctor friend, when completing his degree in medicine, told me how the male rectum is “designed” to accommodate the penis. At that time I still had not come to terms with being gay. That was 1967. Yet, I had always understood how erogenous and erotic the anus and rectum are. In 1968, I came to terms with my own sexual reality and have been quite happy ever since.

      I know this is a rather long post, but your points are very well made.

    • BadSeed

      Thanks, Celtic, for your supportive comment. The only thing I might quibble with is whether having gay sex, i.e., same-sex sex, makes one gay. I would guess that having gay sex is not the same as participating in gay culture, but it is a hard line to draw. I was unaware that same-sex sex was common in Celtic cultures. Where can I read more about this? BTW, let’s hear it for bonabos. I’m all for emulating their behaviors.

    • Celtic

      @BadSeed: @BadSeed: Hey, BadSeed, no problem. Keep in mind that same-sex activity was not even classified until around the time of Freud. (I believe I read somewhere that an earlier behaviorist coined the term “homosexual”, although Freud is credited with the term. And, “gay” did not become a term for homosexuals until the 1960s. When I was growing up, “queer”, “homo”, “light in his loafers” and “musical” referred to gay men.)

      Before the Christian church became involved in Ireland and Scotland, women and men were equals. Thomas Cahill’s “How the Irish saved Civilization” makes reference to same sex relationships in the early part of his book.

      I noted over the years how very little ruckus is raised about lesbian love and lesbian marriage, while gay love and gay marriage continues to be handled almost guardedly. I suspect the reason for that is how, in our patriarchal post-Puritan culture women continue to be lesser and weaker; therefore woman on woman sex “just is”. I also know for fact some heterosexual men love to watch lesbian pornography.

      Back to the Celts for a moment: We originated in Delphi, Ancient Greece roughly 2,700 years ago. We migrated northward, following parts of the Rhine. It is likely modern day Scots and Irish have both German blood and Viking blood. Some of those cultures were pansexual, not following the binary code that has been all but forced upon us in this common area. “If you don’t breed, you are against God” or some sort of crap. In a very comprehensive tome written by Dr. Wainwright Churchill in the 1960s, Churchill asserts that the only thing “abnormal” about homosexual sex is how religion — religion — made it that way.

    • BadSeed

      @Celtic: I am aware of the “Irish… Civilization” book, but have not read it — only reviews. I guess I should. I read Wainwright Churchill in the early ’70’s. I recall his advice that homosexuals should move to a big city. By that time I had done so and was enjoying gay bathhouses, both sexually and socially. His remains a very good book even now. Yes, lesbian sex was mostly ignored, but there was the euphemism “Boston marriage.” The term “homosexual” was coined by a Hungarian doctor in the 1860’s. Freud did not invent it. I think it was Foucault who observed that by his time (post WW2), a gay person had become representative of a species. (See his “History of Sexuality.”) There’s a new book, “Gay Berlin” that takes up these issues. The sin of sodomy was not developed until the 12th C. when Aristotelian science was rediscovered in the West and the Scholastics such as St. Thomas Aquinas developed the now discredited concept of natural law, not to be confused with laws of physics, etc. There’s a book by a Catholic scholar (formerly at Notre Dame, now at Emory U. in Atlanta) called, as I recall, “The Invention of Sodomy.” That was published maybe 20 years ago. May I add: we have to get over the idea that gay marriage is the end-all of our movement. While I’m not opposed to it, it should be seen as another form of social control and the regulation of sexuality.

    • Celtic

      @BadSeed: Awesome refresher course! I actually have a copy of Churchill’s book in my library (a pristine copy, at that!). Aquinas was somewhat infamous after the fact, declaring that heterosexual sex must be performed in the “ministerial” position: the woman on her back. Yet, scholars have concluded that Aquinas actually never had sex; at least not with women.

      I read Churchill’s work while completing my undergraduate work after Military service. I was struggling with my homosexuality, and his book was enlightening. I finally came out in 1968 with my first partner. We remained partners for 8 years, and close friends until his death in 1996. Our bond never ended.

      As to marriage, I understand the legal reasons gays and lesbians want to marry. There are far too many stories about families intervening when one partner was in hospital, dying, and the family of the dying partner refused access to the other partner. Pretty hideous, actually. There are substantial benefits to be had with a legal marriage, including not having to testify against one’s partner as was the case with Roseanne. Since partners opt to marry on their own without any compulsion that I am aware of, I support that choice. As an ordained Priest, I will happily marry gay and lesbian couples if asked.

      “Sodomy” is a misnomer for homosexual sex, usually anal sex. The story of Sodom and Gomorrah has nothing to do with homosexuality.

    • BadSeed

      @Celtic: I do not oppose gay marriage (as I said I didn’t oppose it) for all the reasons you state. However, that it is a measure for social control and the regulation of sexuality does not make it ipso facto undesirable. It just makes it subject to legislation. I like to see it as an extension of the buddy system that the military encourages. I don’t much believe in love any more than I believe in a personal god. Love is just a four-letter word usually positively understood and often a euphemism for sex when narrowly defined. Its association with marriage in popular culture may be a stretch. . . The meaning of sodomy has always been vague or subject to more specific definition and given that the term derives from a place name, that it is vague with respect to behavior makes sense. In my lexicon sodomy = non-procreative sexual behaviors of which there are a variety. I’m well aware of the inhospitality interpretation.

  • py1285tk

    No one has mentioned bonobos. Bonobos show homosexual behaviour and this research makes sense. Sex has developed into something extra. To quote: “Bonobos, who use sex to resolve conflict, have never been seen to kill each other. They share food. They are more cooperative than chimpanzees. And they are nicer to strangers than they are to friends. To bonobos, a peaceful, sexual existence is the most natural thing in the world.”

  • ashton7326

    also certain personal lubricants can increase HIV replication and may Enhance HIV transmission

  • 1234

    I have always been only interested in females, yet since I am submissive my wife has had me wear panties and I sleep in a nightgown. I am very much into cross dressing and she helps me with my make up. When we vacation we go as girlfriends so we can take our fantasies to the next level. She has been giving me great prostrate orgasms for years when she pegs me. I please her orally and the she takes me as a woman.

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