Shawn Mendes has achieved meteoric success, but he makes no mystery of the fact that persistent gay rumors are one major downside.
Though he’s said as much in the past, the “Stitches” singer broached the subject in a new interview with The Guardian.
“There was a desperation for me to come out as being gay, which is such a ridiculous thing,” he said. “I got upset because I know people who are gay who haven’t come out yet and I know the suffering they experience because of that.”
“It’s just completely ignorant and insensitive of people to be on that s**t,” he added.
How about we take this to the next level?
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In 2018, Mendes admitted to Rolling Stone he was struggling with the feeling of trying to “convince” people he is straight.
This massive, massive thing for the last five years about me being gay.
In the back of my heart, I feel like I need to go be seen with someone – like a girl – in public, to prove to people that I’m not gay.
Even though in my heart, I know that it’s not a bad thing. There’s still a piece of me that thinks that.
And I hate that side of me.
Mendes released his fourth studio album, Wonder, on December 4.
Catholicslutbox
” I feel like I need to go be seen with someone – like a girl – in public, to prove to people that I’m not gay.”
I hear Taylor Swift is a good beard.
he’ll come out in his 40s/50s like all the others…once his career is over and is trying to kickstart it again.
MrMichaelJ
Taylor Swift is a lesbian. She does nothing but date closeted gay man.
TomG
It’s now almost 2021, why do people even care who sleeps with whom. It’s irrelevant, especially now that same sex marriage is legal.
helenhunty
Oh please, Michael Musto literally shared a blind item here last week about Shawn and Camila staying in separate hotels when they travel. If you read Shawn’s Rolling Stone profile from 2 years ago, he talks about needing to be seen in public with a woman to dispel gay rumours. A few months later he was in a “relationship” with Camila and they’ve been shoving their “love” down our throats ever since. His gayness (and desire to remain closeted) is an open secret in the industry and I’ve heard from reliable sources that even his management doesn’t know what to do about it. Shawn is living in a prison of his own making and I can’t believe he actually has anyone fooled.
Donston
The point isn’t what he is. The point is that it’s no one’s business. And we should not be trying to pressure young people (or really anyone) to “come out”.
Cam
@Donston
Except let’s not enshrine the closet, by pushing the “Nobody needs to come out” line. He is in a safe space, his fans already think he is, and it isn’t as if he’s going to get kicked out of his house. The more well known people come out, the less traumatizing it is for the 14 year old stuck in a bigoted small town in Utah who is contemplating suicide because they think they’re alone.
And when he gives interviews about his dating life, then yes, his personal life is fair game because he’s talking about it.
Dannyzackery
You do know people are forcing him to stay closeted. The moment he comes out, he will be rainbowlisted. Never to perform or make music again.
KM201
@Dannyzackery After this flop of an album, which even Justin Bieber couldn’t salvage, no record company is going to going to want to record Shawn’s crappy “music” ever again: in the closet or out.
Gourmet Guy
Young closeted gay people have a grotesquely high suicide rate. I strongly believe that if famous “icons” who are gay would come out, that suicide rate would plummet. I’ve been openly gay for my entire adult life, and have been very happy about that. And I’ve seen the suffering that young gay people go through when they cannot come out. I’ve seen them tormented, thrown out by their families, driven into deep depressions, and more. THAT, Donston, is EVERYONE’S business!
Donston
This is the type of pious, self-righteous but ultimately ignorant and controlling perspective that some people use to justify being anti “lgbtq community”. All I can do is hope that you’re really young. I recall being somewhat like this in my teens and early 20s.
“Representation” is great. Being yourself and not manipulating people is great. But no one owes you anything. Furthermore, you don’t know anything about Shawn’s dimensions or struggles. Focus on education, freedom, mental health, eradicating prejudice and sociological pressure. Trying to force people out does nothing but make you look like an insensitive and insecure jackass.
pscheck2
Amen! It’s the same tired response that most of these ‘closeted’ Twinks use when they are confronted with these rumors! A recent example is Wentworth Miller- who denied the rumors vehemently when he was staring in that TV series ‘Prison Break’ He only came out to protest Putin’s antigay legislation in Russia! He could have accomplished more good by coming out while staring in that series as he was a macho hero, one that gay teenagers would have as a role model. This is also true of some iconic NFL football players– but most go the ‘Beard’ route, even marrying their ‘Beards!’ Of course, they are faced with the problem of losing their sponsors (money!) but most of them are worth millions, so a little sponsor loss should not matter! BUT look at the good they could do for these kids just realizing that they are gay, all alone, without a macho hero to look up to!
amen!
Donston
Unless someone’s being hateful, ignorant, hypocritical or really damn annoying, just leave people the hell alone. Constantly going on social media claiming someone is a closet case and making fun of them based off of your perception, that makes you a bad person. Period. And it sure as hell does not lead to anyone coming out any quicker if they are struggling to “come out”. It’s not going to assist any form of “gay” pride, no matter where they fit on the spectrum.
I understand that gossip is a part of human nature. It’s never gonna go away. But you can’t force anyone to come out. You can’t force anyone to embrace whatever identity. You don’t know about the nature, dimensions, fluidity of anyone’s sexuality. You don’t know where they fit in the gender, romantic, sexual, affection, emotional investment, relationship contentment spectrum. You don’t know what type of internal and external struggles they’ve gone through or are currently going through. And no, being a rich, famous, conventionally good looking white boy doesn’t mean you have a right to constantly talk shit about them or make fun of them. Too many people think they know shit when they don’t have a clue. Once again, leave people alone.
Cam
He needs to get over it. If he isn’t gay then who cares. If he is, it already seems like his fans don’t care.
Donston
As I’ve explained tons of times here, not everyone’s struggles comes down to merely not wanting to be seen as “gay”. You don’t know anyone’s dimensions, struggles or journey. So, stop assuming things about people and stop “labeling” people and stop trying to shame people into “coming out”. No matter how much you and others try to make those things okay, they’re not ever gonna be okay. It gets to the point where it does become about shaming people and bullying people. And it’s often the “queers” who are most ignorant when it comes to sexuality, gender, orientation, mental health, sociological struggles that tend to be the most egregious and self-righteous.
I do agree that Shawn needs to stop talking about it. If he didn’t get up caught up in trying to “prove” something to people, this all would have likely mostly died down by now. It’s never smart to get overly concerned with how people perceive you or trying to “prove” something to somebody. But young people especially do get caught up in that.
Cam
@Donston
My issue is, he seems to give multiple interviews about how awful it is for him to be perceived as gay. I see that as harmful. If he wants people to stop questioning stop bringing it up, literally EVERY other actor goes through it, and ones as butch as Chris Meloni and Hugh Jackman don’t seem to mind. Shawn outs himself by showing his gay panic.
barryaksarben
Donston is full of it. Yes, things can change and it wont be horrible coming out if everyone does it all the time. I am older and I know when I reached puberty I chose not to lie about it in IOWA in the 70s and it wasnt shame that bothered me it was other peoples reaction. Most thought they had never met anyone gay and there was alot of violence aimed towards me. I was a unicorn as no one anywhere around me was gay so many people around me took their cues from the people most interested in me and my being gay – the bigots and the haters. 30 years later I had a nephew come out in high school and he ran into some violence but said many in his school and town knew gay people so many were just fine with it. For progress to occur you must have some push back or nothing changes. Without heros like Harvey Milk we would still have no one in elected office and this election set a record for gays and our allies in office. To pretend the only reason not to come out is being a little uncomfortable is cowardice in its worst form. I think of how many people are inspired to come out by a celeb and I have to ask are you even out in your life and if so who inspired you to come out
Donston
I’m aware of all that, and my points still stand.
Donston
Oh, Barry. Harvey was a “queer leader” because he wanted to be. He took on that responsibility. And good on him for doing so. Everyone has their own dimensions, struggles, journeys and motivations. And trying to shame young public figures that ain’t bothering no body into “coming out” is never gonna be okay. No matter what you a-holes keep trying to tell yourselves. It will never be okay.
trsxyz
I can only imagine how difficult it must be, when you are a 22 year-old public personality, having all of this background chatter telling you that you’re gay and you need to come out. (He’s already been frank about having an anxiety disorder… So I’m sure this pressure doesn’t help his condition.) I have no idea whether he is or isn’t gay. And he seems a little confused about the issue himself. But it doesn’t appear that he’s done anything to harm or disparage the gay community. So maybe people need to let him find his own path to the truth about himself, on his own timetable.
masterwill7
Seriously? Let the guy be… Who cares what he is, he’s unreachable for all of us anyway! Just like his music or don’t like it..
CBHaynes
I’m sorry but I’ve been in the industry (meaning gay) for decades and this guy is gay — or at the very least displays stereotype gay qualities. Yes, I said it. AND there is NOTHING wrong with that. But it is what it is. He will have to come out when he’s ready. His interviews are cringe-worthy and make those old Ricky Martin interviews looks butch as hell. It also doesn’t help that the paparazzi keep “catching he and his girlfriend” kissing in public every 5 minutes. Looks desperate to change the media narrative.
j41005
His statement is funny….just because you have a girl on your arm does not prove you’re straight! I was married and hiding being gay for many years.
radiooutmike
Right there with ya on that one.
barryaksarben
it would only be worse if she was in canada
C_Alan
“I know people who are gay who haven’t come out yet”
…is what a totally straight person would say and not projecting at all.
jdr11201
If he is or he isn’t,
It up to Shawn, leave him alone, let him create his music without people hounding him about his sexuality. Folks can be so grimy. You go on young man ?.
barryaksarben
Excuse me but I hate to break it to you but being a celeb your personal life is going to get examined and commented on. NOT MY rule but it is reality and his answer do sound like he is trying to hard. I personally dont care but in reality many many do so too bad. He doesnt need to comment if straight just live his life like all the other straight guys accused of being gay do or laugh it off. I laugh every time someone has assumed Im straight
nathan
Whether he is gay or not has not the slightest interest for me. Why some gay people seem ‘desperate’ for him to be gay is beyond me. If he is gay fine – if he is straight fine. It makes no difference to any of us whether or not he is gay.
Joseph1971
Why not just let the guy live his life and if he is gay, let him come out on his own terms. To make him constantly address the rumors will only alienate him from the press and we will know less about him, and appearances in the public eye will be fewer and fewer. I think fans want to see more of him, not less.
Georgeiv2
Oh for heaven’s sake who cares !
Larryinnyc
I agree. Let him be
Jay002
I don’t know if you seen the studies that show girls between the ages of 7 to 18 spend more money on crap than any other group of people. That is why movies, music and TV shows suck ( sorry girls) so I am pretty sure Shawn Mendes manager said to him if you want to keep bringing in millions keep it straight buddy.
sean t
I appreciate the fact that he admits that he knows that there is nothing wrong with being gay, but he still feels the need to “prove” that he isn’t. He clearly admits that he doesn’t like this about himself—-the first step for someone to grow and evolve.
We are socialized from little boys to be hyper masculine and to not exhibit any signs of femininity or weakness. My main concern during my junior high and high school years was making sure that my behavior didn’t come across as remotely feminine….I’m guessing this was the case for a lot of y’all as well.
My main point here is I have a hard time criticizing any man who worries that people might think he is gay. I’m fully acquainted with the pain behind that worry.
LenP
There is so much more going on in the world that we should be concerned with. It’s pretty pathetic people spending so much time worrying about whether the boy is gay or not. Really, even if he is gay, how is that going to change your world? Let him be for God’s sake and get a life.
Seasoned57
He sounds like he is more concerned how he is “perceived” as being gay. Yes, there seems to be too much pushing back from him on this matter. That has a lot to do on how he sees himself. No one should have to prove who they are.
michel_banen
He’s a singer and that’s what counts. Yes he’s cute and people are free to fantasize. If he’s gay or not is up to him. And if he is it’s up to him if he wants to come out or not. I honestly think that he’d be out if he was actually gay though.
Larryinnyc
I agree
Larryinnyc
I agree. he is who he is no matter what.
ElPillo
Can the story include something about why I should care?
lord.krath
Does it need to? It warranted enough of an effort for you to click on the title and to post a reply. You cared enough for that.
lord.krath
It is a shame this is what we [the public] do to celebrities. Admittedly, this is not unlike what happened to Ricky Martin. Imagine having to go around in public and be seen with a specific gender, just to ward off suspicions that you’re not actually of a particular sexual orientation???! /GASP Those of us that did struggle with coming out when it was less [acceptable to do so] should totally understand this stress. Those that didn’t have to deal with it should still be more appreciative that he is an ally, at the very least. Do people wish he were [gay]? Sure. Why? I don’t know. To fulfill some fantasy, perhaps? But you can still have the fantasy without badgering and harassing the man [and wishing he was something that he is not].
Donston
Him wanting to “prove” something to people does not equate to him being “not straight”. The rumors and jokes were already persisting. It does show that he was self-conscious and insecure about it.
You can’t “prove” your orientation or sexuality anyways. That “proving” shit mentality is something even many out “queers” need to get over. Being a homo doesn’t mean you’re unwilling to publicly date a cis chick. Being a homo doesn’t mean you’re unwilling to sexually engage with someone of your opposite sex. While attraction, arousal, desire, enjoyment, preferences, behaviors and extent of sex drive are all different things. You also don’t know what someone has gone through fluidity wise or contradiction wise. You don’t know where they fit in the gender, romantic, sexual, emotional, relationship contentment spectrum. You don’t know how much someone may be driven by insecurities, sociology, money, resentment, religion, mental health, ego, etc. So, trying to prove something to anyone serves little purpose and will just make your life worse.
It does seem as if he’s admitting that he was being problematic and desperate. That can be forgiven because of his youth. There’s still a lot of pressures and ignorance. There’s a lot of people who think that they get sexuality, gender, orientation but really don’t. We need to evolve how we communicate. Putting the responsibility on young public figures and trying to shame them is not going to help anyone.
WSnyder
Why is there this almost pathological need by members in the LGBTQ+ Community to terrorize celebs into coming out if they suspect/hope they’re gay? Isn’t this a personal choice and WTF do *you* think it matters if they do or don’t? Do you think that if someone you idolize or someone who is very popular or very visible comes out that somehow validates your own Queerness? Get a Grip.
davey14
Gay or not, I hate his new hairstyle.
ScottOnEarth
This idiot says it has been a “massive, massive thing for the past five years.” Really? A false rumor that hasn’t impacted his success is massive? He is disgusting in his desperation to prove that he’s not gay, clearly implying how horrific it would be for him to actually be gay. It’s almost 2021 and a-holes like this still panic at th “gay” question? GTFO.
caliboy17
To quote the great Eva Tanguay…I DON’T CARE, I DON’T CARE. Unless Shawn wants to go out on the town with me…then, I DO CARE!
o.codone
@caliboy17. Here’s what dude. I’m first with Mendez. When I’m done I’m gonna pass him to you, exhausted and empty. Sue me. Hahahha.
nm4047
I’m with callboy17
frankcar1965
That big bitch is gay as a picnic basket. just come on out gurlfriend.
cuteguy
Leave him alone, gay or straight. None of our business
Dannyzackery
It’s always gay. He could be bisexual. A dude can date a guy and still be attracted to girls. Also, he has a good reason to not come out. In the music industry, especially in the music economy, being gay or bi will ruin your life.
Donston
Can we not turn this into another “gay” vs “bi” thing? It’s exhausting and dumb. When are we gonna get to the point of just accepting that everyone has their own thing going on and their own journey and just throw away all this identity dependence? You are also clearly not that familiar with Shawn and these rumors. There have been no real rumors that he’s dated a guy. People are claiming that his relationships with females are entirely fabricated.
KM201
Shawn Mendes is such a bish that he got a thread deleted on the Datalounge because the commenters there were nasty and making fun of his flop album. Such a sensitive little diva this closet queen is. She needs a long overdue humbling.
Kanaka4127
If I was struggling with my sexuality (which he definitely isn’t) and I read some of these comments I’d slam my ass back in the closet.
Topazme
Do people really want to hound shawn mendes and bully him over this when it is nobody’s damn business….or do you guys want him to be the next justin bieber…let me remind you guys how at young age of 14 he was trolled mercilessly as looking like a girl and lesbian…everyone on the internet mocked him…and how do you think a young straight boy would react to that when the whole world is unnecesarily making fun of you masculitnity….you act out and become toxic and do stupid things which you might think will make people perceive you of being manly and respect you…and when you fail at that you just kinda let go and dont think about how you look or act…..
RickHeathen
It would be great if everyone who was LGBT would come out at once, we would live in a different and most likely better world if they did. However, that’s not going to happen. We have to live in the world we have not the world we wish we had—for as rotten to the core this one seems at times. So, insisting and hounding that Shawn come out—providing he has anything to come out with—is to insist that 1. you know him, 2. you have a right to control his future, and 3. that he has an obligation to you.
Donston
What’s funny (or rather sad) is that I’m sure a good percentage of people who have spent the last several years gossiping about this boy are well over 30, way too old to be in young people’s business and too old to still be obsessing with other people’s sex lives, sexualities or identities.
It seems as if shaming people and being bitter is the only concept some folks understand. They don’t understand the concept minding their own business or that these random entertainers don’t owe them anything. They don’t get the concept that you cannot determine when it’s best for someone else to “come out”. Hell, so many of y’all still don’t get the concepts of shit like sexual or gender fluidity, everyone having their own sexualities, everyone having their own spot in the orientation spectrum.
If you really think Shawn is deeply closeted you have the right to think that. But how is constantly posting bitchy remarks on the internet going to help him or anyone else “come out” or gain complete self-comfort? Those bitchy remarks are about your personal catharsis and bitterness alone. It’s not about helping anyone else. So, stop with the “he must come out for the better good” crap. We see through that bullshit. You’re just making the rest of us “queers” look bitchy, bitter bullies.
Cam
The true monsters here are the managers, PR agents and record executives that keep hiding their own bigotry behind the lie that his teen girl audience won’t accept him if he comes out.
The same way all of those burned out old gasbag Senators and Congressmen kept saying the military would collapse and soldiers wouldn’t serve if LGBTQ people were allowed in.
Donston
Sure, but you also still have a very difficult time accepting that not everyone’s struggles is about fear. Some people really just don’t want to “come out” because they simply don’t think it’s anyone’s business. Or some people just don’t want a ton of attention because of sexuality or orientation. (Just like some people “come out” because they crave that brand of attention). Some people don’t want to “come out” until they’re absolutely certain of who they are and what they want. Some people are dealing with a lot of fluidity, traumas, paraphiliacs, confusions, contradictions, mental health issues, etc. And that’s keeping them from being completely honest. There are a lot of different reasons why people “come out” or don’t. And thinking everyone is motivated by fear or by wanting to maintain sociological status means you’re dismissing a lot of different struggles and motivations.
And folks really are acting as if this dude still doesn’t have a whole as gf and is still saying he’s not “gay”. No matter what you or anyone else thinks it’s time to leave him the hell alone.
Cam
@Donston
And why don’t they think it’s “Anyones business”? Because of the bigotry out there. If there wasn’t that, there is no reason to hide it. Name me the straight person who doesn’t wear a wedding ring,or occasionally hold their partner’s hand, etc. In your quest to defend this point, be careful you don’t end up enshrining the closet.
Brian
OMG, y’all, leave him alone. There is no reason to speculate or pester.
I see no problem with outing hypocrites like Aaron Schock when they use their power and connections to hurt other gay people. But this singer isn’t like that at all.
succubus
he sure is one goofy looking mo fo
who cares?
jjose712
He seemed a nice at the beginning.
And he is not very smart, his Rolling Stone backfired big time (his homophobia was only the tip of the iceberg) and he seemed not to learn a thing.
I don’t think he has a gay following right now (at least not a big one) and nobody is desperate for him to come out, people simply not believe his relationship because everybody with a brain knows it’s totally fake, as simple as that.
Anyway, i think he’ll fullfill his dream of nobody thinking of him as gay because his career is not going to last (his album is down to 32 on itunes and the second week is going to be terrible, not even a duet with Bieber is going to save it), so he’ll be a has been pretty soon
Donston
I really don’t get the hostility that some of y’all grown mf-ers have towards young people that ain’t bothering you. He is acknowledging that his comments and behaviors in the past were problematic and a bit desperate. Because of his youth and public pressure, that can be forgiven. He’s still only 22.
However his life and career unfolds is how it unfolds. Y’all want him to say he’s “gay” and that his relationship is BS. It’s not gonna happen, at least not any time soon. And at this point y’all grown ass people are coming off like bitter bullies who’s in the business of kids. Y’all don’t even know anything about thing dude’s sexuality, orientation and where he is in the spectrum. Move on.
Rock Star
Leave him alone already, geez, why should we care. He’s a nice guy, that’s it.