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In an interview in the October issue of Attitude magazine, dance artist Bright Light Bright Light, aka Rod Thomas, has spoken out about how he’s often not felt “cool enough” to feel comfortable in some queer spaces.
Now a resident of New York City, the Welsh-born 37-year-old, who has supported Elton John, Cher and Erasure on tour, among others, has found himself dubbed “boring” for being a DJ who doesn’t do drugs. Also, as he doesn’t go to the gym, he’s felt invisible to some other gay men. He’s now learned that “those people don’t matter.”
Related: Bright Light Bright Light just put out a new song with Jake Shears! We are here for it
“Feeling like I belonged within the gay community I think has been a bit of a struggle,” he said. “The LGBTQ+ community is such a vast umbrella; everyone is so different and trying to work out where you belong within that is hard.”
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“I’m one of those people that loves nightlife and dancing and making music, but I also don’t do drugs and I don’t go to a place that a lot of people do, and at some points, nightlife was very drug-heavy,” he said.
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Despite being an in-demand collaborator, he says he sometimes felt looked down upon on the club scene.
“People, often in London, called me ‘boring’ on more than one occasion … I would be DJing and I was looked at as the boring DJ, and it was really crushing. I felt like even at some of my own DJ sets at nights I was performing at, I wasn’t deemed ‘cool enough.’”
He went on to talk about experiencing a lack of body confidence on the gay scene.
“I’m not ‘body-appropriate’ for people in these spaces. I don’t go to the gym in a way that a lot of people do, and I know I am invisible to a huge section of the LGBTQ+ community. It doesn’t matter because those people don’t matter, but I found that a huge struggle, feeling invisible or not welcome in queer spaces, even more heartbreaking than not being welcome in heterosexual spaces, because these spaces are there for everybody that needs them.”
Related: Bright Light Bright Light teams up once again with Sir Elton John for “Running Back To You”
Thomas will release his fourth studio album, Fun City, on September 18. He has previously collaborated with Elton John and Jake Shears of Scissor Sisters. His most recent single, out in the summer, was aptly enough entitled “I Used To Be Cool”.
H/T: Attitude
IntellectualHomosexual
Oof. I needed this bad. We don’t talk enough about how exclusive the gay ‘community’ can be and yet I feel like more of us feel it than not.
Neoprene
If I don’t fit into some “exclusive space” I view that as a positive thing as it means that space is occupied by the overtly pompous. There will always be those who place a premium on excluding others for various reasons. So be it. Not a reflection on me.
Donston
It does seem “queers” are more likely to deal with greater self-consciousness and greater obsessions with social placements. You’re not “masculine” enough. You’re not “feminine” enough. You’re not fit enough or conventionally good-looking enough. You don’t do drugs. You you’re not obsessed with partying. Or you’re constantly getting judged for doing drugs and partying. You’re not “gay” enough or “bi” enough or “straight” enough.
Too many stay hyper concerned with validation and sociological fit. I don’t really know if it can be fixed, because so much is dictated by sociology, identity, ego and physical appeal.
goozy76
the struggle…
Vince
Well then stay away from the clubs then. The clubs will always cater to drugs and the guys with the hot bodies will always reign supreme.
No different then if I went to circuit party and complained everyone was doing drugs and too much focus on the body. These places cater to that.
LegionKeign
What a whiner!
When I found the gay scene in Ann Arbor, MI in the late 80’s I dealt with everyone’s judgmental bullshit according because I gave ZERO FUXS!
I grew-up being bullied from kindergarten straight through 12th grade. Did it stop my big red-haired ass from acting any differently, NO!
I was never queenie enough for the queens or butch enough for the butch queens. The drag queens hated me cause I wasn’t someone thin and cute, I looked like a trucker and made a FAB drag queen.
I am me and if folks didn’t like me…OH WELL!
I actually went to the clubs to DANCE and that’s what I did.
It saddened me to my heart (I was naive) when I realized that the gay community was just as judgmental, vapid and tiresome as everyone else.
I had less judgement and a better time parting with my Black/Latino straight friends and family.
Grow-up, get over it and live your life!
frapachino
He’s not a bad looking guy , he could use a bit of a makeover though!
Jonathan5865
UHHH he’s a slim white dude with facial hair. That’s the gay community’s collective wet dream. Not body appropriate my ass. Try being an overweight femme black gay or some shit.
charlie_jackpot
This!
sistercylon
For real! Cry me a river, skinny white dude.
laurent7465
I think he’s sexy and perfect just the way he is. Much sexier than most guys out there. I can certainly relate as someone who doesn’t do drugs, doesn’t smoke or drink and who thinks poppers and pot are drugs. I don’t do clubs or gay events, nor do I go to the gym AND I like NASCAR. Try fitting THAT into the gay community. Been single most of my life and I guess I plan on it staying that way. Some of us are different and that’s ok. I’d rather be single and be myself than try and fit into a very small and crowded box.
jonsir
Yeah this sounds a little boohooey. I get mental struggle, but brah…. relax.
shakes_head
About to throw a pity party for this skinny white dude with facial hair living in NY from the UK that djs/tours with Cher and Elton John. He obviously needs the support…
BudAnderson
Oh no! This thin, fit, young white man isn’t “body appropriate.” *wrings hands* Whatever will become of him? What will happen when he’s over-40, puts on a little weight and stops dressing like a teenager? Boo friggin’ hoo.
I always wonder what will happen to this sort of person if they ever were to have a real problem.
innocentgay
This is hard to grasp; I don’t want to be mean, but what the hell kind of scene is he visiting where a skinny white guy in short shorts is totally shut out? Is there some kind of upper-tier porn-pony-only gay club that I as a muggle can’t even see?!
alex1435
I get what he’s talking about !
Thad
I’ve been a Bright Light Bright Light fan for a while…since “Disco Moment”, which is still a great song. I’ve heard him in concert and as DJ and it’s always been fun. I miss dance parties and live music and await their return.
johnnymcmxxx
He is very body appropriate for me. I do not like gym queens with 8 packs and bulging steroid muscles and shrunken balls. A man with a a body like this man is the sexiest of all. It isn’t a parody or a cartoon of masculinity. It’s the real thing.
barryaksarben
MAN, so man mean nasty comments. WE ALL HAVE OUR STRUGGLES. IF you were interviewed how would you respond? I think he looks fine and I love his music. I left Omaha to live in LA ‘s boys town in 79 and the clubs were wild. I went with my friends to them to dance and we had a great time. We were not stunning in any way. no bodybuilders, or pinup boys just regular guys having fun. I lost many to AIDS and after a long term relationship found it strange to be out dancing. I stopped because of it. BUT< it was my decision and Im fine with it. I dont blame others and I dont denigrate others for HOW THEY FEEL.
BrinLondo
It’s hard seeing people who are ADORABLE making comments like that. Mind you , I understand that even the most beautiful people find themselves feeling insecure….but I have a VERY hard time believing he would be “invisible” or “ignored.” Try being fat. Old. Broke. Not white. Etc Etc.
BTW – I LOVE his music and I would DEVOUR a cute fuzzy guy like that, especially one so talented.
justyouandi
I’m sold on that body hair alone; especially those legs!
Yooper
Pity party, party of one…..
@dusyk
LoL ? wait till you hit your sixties, it doesn’t get any easier!