THE DATING GAME

Sound The Alarm! Ricky Martin’s Single — 5 Men Who Should Shake His Bon Bon

ricky-love-connection“Ricky and Carlos have mutually agreed to end their relationship but continue to be united by friendship and their shared experiences,” a Martin spokesperson told Just Jared.

That’s right, Ricky Martin has split from his longtime boyfriend Carlos Gonzalez Abella. And the Jewish mother in us — there’s one in every gay man — has already paged through our Rolodex to find some suitable suitors to join Ricky in his vida loca.

We’re playing matchmaker, matchmaker, we’re making a match — finding Ricky Martin a find, we’re gonna catch him a catch!

Marc Jacobs

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Jacobs, always a fan of a Latina, recently went through a break-up with stunt queen/porn star/model Harry Louis so perhaps he and Ricky can lick each other’s wounds. And since they both do yoga, god knows what else.

 Zachary Quinto

ricky-zach

Both fans of the Great White Way, Martin and Quinto already have one thing in common. Maybe after Zach is finished with The Glass Menagerie, he and Ricky can mount yet another revival of Evita, this time with Ricky in the title role — Don’t cry for him, Puerto Rico — anything to bring that mustache back.

Chris Colfer

ricky-chris

Hey, maybe Ricky’s not busy enough with two kids and he would like a third one to balance things out. The hand that rocks the cradle can also rob it. You know Chris was ready for some burglary when Ricky guest starred on Glee based on this photo (and Chris’s creeping right hand) alone.

Calvin Klein

ricky-calvin-nick

On the other end of the age spectrum is sugar daddy extraordinaire Calvin Klein. Of course, Ricky has his own coins, but maybe he’s looking for an older, wiser man to show him how to truly love or, more realistically, how to replace one’s dentures in the middle of the night without turning the lights on.

Perez Hilton

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I dunno, they’re both dads. That’s something, right? Maybe Ricky can just ignore all those years of gay-baiting on Perez’s behalf and Perez can take a note from Ricky on how to take a shirtless family portrait that won’t haunt people for all eternity.

Now there’s no edict that says Ricky has to date a fellow celeb so there’s potentially hope for anyone. But since it’s not every day that a sexy, Latino pop star and noted DILF — bachelors don’t get more eligible than that — is on the market, so for the especially thirsty lads out there: let’s keep it civil.