Masc 4 Green

Stephen Colbert to straight dudes: “Caring for the earth is butch as hell”

Late night host Stephen Colbert has lashed out against straight men who don’t recycle because they think it makes them look gay.

Colbert referenced a recent study that revealed the anti-recycling attitude among straight men in his Thursday night broadcast, greeting the news with his usual indignation and razor wit.

“Really?” Colbert croaked. “Really, men? Is there no limit to straight male fragility? … Besides who said gay people suddenly have a reputation for being environmentally conscious? Have you seen the aftermath of a Gay Pride parade?”

Related: Watch a roomful of people laugh in the face of a “Straight Pride” organizer

As queer people, we admit: Colbert has a point.

“Now straight men think the way they bag their groceries indicates their sexual orientation?” Colbert asked. ‘It’s gonna make checking out at the grocery store a little more interesting. ‘Uh sir, did you bring your own bag today?’ ‘Uh, did I bring my own bag? Um…I mean once when I was in college, but uh, it was college and it was a fraternity thing.'”

“This isn’t just toxic masculinity, this is literally toxic,” he added.”And as a ruggedly heterosexual male, I feel responsibility to convince my fellow hairy-chested man men that caring for the earth is butch as hell.”

Frankly, we agree. And if it indeed does take adding breasts to recycle bins to get straight men to recycle, we can deal with that too.