Straight White Guys In Ohio Feel Oppressed, Plan To Hold “Straight White Guy Festival”

Straight-White-Guy-Festival-coming-to-Ohio-in-SeptemberStraight white men plan on whipping out their dicks, thumping their chests, and asserting their heterosexuality this September in Ohio. Or at least that’s what flyers posted in a local park seem to imply.

According to the flyers, which began circulating earlier this week, the festival will take place in Goodale Park in Columbus on September 20 from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. Admission is free. Everyone is welcome. Beer will be available, but illegal drugs are forbidden.

Goodale Park is the same park where Ohio’s Gay Pride festivities are held each year.

It’s unclear whether the flyers are someone’s poor attempt at a joke or not, but the situation has many locals scratching their heads. One woman tweeted:

Others find the flyers offensive.

“This kind of thing implies there’s some kind of struggle going on for being a straight white person in Ohio. Straight white people are doing just fine,” same-sex marriage advocate Michael Premo told 10TV. “I think it detracts from the real problems of Ohio that need to be solved, that are being denied their constitutional rights because of who they are, or who the love.”

Some, however, don’t take any issue with it. Local resident Cheralyn Elkins told 10TV, “I think it’s funny. If they want to do this, great, freedom of expression.”

Ohio, of course, has quite a bit of work to do when it comes to granting full equality to gay people. Same-sex marriage is still illegal and domestic partnerships are only offered in a small handful of cities and counties. The state’s current hate crime laws address violence based on race, color, religion or national origin, but not on sexual orientation or gender identity. The state will not alter a sex on birth certificates for trans people, nor does it allow second-parent adoptions for same-sex couples.

No official permit requests have been filed with the city, which implies the whole thing is a hoax. But you never know. As Lauren Bagley said in her tweet, weirder things have happened.

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  • DB75

    The first line of the article isn’t doing much to paint this as a bad thing. ha ha I’m checking flight reservations right now! (j/k – I’ll drive there.)

  • Charlie in Charge

    Do it. Have one. Enjoy the hell out of it, it doesn’t dim Pride at all for us.

  • masc4masc

    Hey, why not? There are prides and festivals for just about every other demographic. People who were offended by this are just incredibly insecure control freaks. If the intent was to offend, the best response is to just laugh and approve. Might be a hoax now, but could be real in the near future…and I won’t lose any sleep over it.

  • Dxley

    See? Nobody cares! Let them have it and enjoy it!

  • Ihadtosayit

    WOW no minorities allowed this sounds like someone’s Grindr profile

  • abuelo

    It might be fun for a bunch of us LGBT folks white or of color to show up and help these lost scared little lambs know that they are loved and safe. You can just tell the poor things are feeling abandoned.

    Maybe we could start a movement to adopt one of these little beleaguered waif’s and give them a safe home. I feel bad about neglecting them all these years

  • Cam

    No ACTUAL straight guys care THAT much about gay issues to feel that defensive.

    It is only self hating closet cases who would go to this much trouble. So enjoy the day guys……..and we’ll see all of you at the boy bar driving around the parking lot afraid to come in later that night. ;)

  • Ripley1974

    Goodale Park is right down the street from me. First of all let me correct the error in the Article. Goodale is not in Clintonville, Oh. It is in the heart of downtown, Columbus, one of the gayest/gay-friendly places in Ohio.Iif straight guys have a problem here, they are in the wrong place.

    I can see why they feel left out, though. Our pride here two weeks ago drew hundreds of thousands of people, straight and gay.

  • ryannick

    I live right next to Goodale Park in the Victorian Village/Short North neighborhood in downtown Columbus (not Clintonville), and I say, heck, why not. Just know I’ll be ogling the shit out of you, bro. Have another beer and then come on over and tell me how “you’ve never done this before.” Mmhmm.

  • Saint Law

    Self pity party.

  • DistingueTraces

    No straight guy I’ve ever known would have been all that enthused at going to a party that was all for straight men.

    In fact that tends to be their measure that a party has failed.

  • Qjersey

    So it will be like any other saturday in the park

  • Scribe38

    I live in Toledo Oh for school, every f*cking day is str8 guy day.

  • DarkZephyr

    @DistingueTraces: Ha ha ha, excellent point. Usually straight guys complain that such parties are lame “sausage fests”. lol

  • Asti908

    It appears straight white men cannot spell either… (Celebrate) is misspelled

  • Lvng1tor

    Isn’t this just every Sunday during football season in stadium parking lots across the country?

  • Blackceo

    Gotta love white privilege….gay or straight.

  • Tookietookie123

    Sociologically speaking, straight white males are the most privileged group in the world. I find it hilarious that they feel oppressed when they in fact are the oppressors, you don’t feel oppressed, that’s equality, know the difference.

  • Lvng1tor

    @Blackceo: Comforting to know that Trolls come in all colors though!

  • Blackceo


    The laws of this country were created to and continue to mostly protect heterosexual, Christian, White males. Women, gays, and people of color will continue to have to fight for awhile for true equality.

  • BJ McFrisky

    Why does a parade have to be only for “oppressed” groups? The Irish have parades, Puerto Ricans do, all manners of humanity express their pride through parades. But when white people do it—especially (gasp!) STRAIGHT white people—parades are suddenly self-serving excuses to propagandize (or, in the opinion of some, to mask their latent homosexuality).

    I’m stunned by the reactions to this. Whatever happened to “live and let live”? Whatever happened to “tolerance”? Whatever happened to “progressivism”? Apparently those terms only apply to those groups whom “tolerant progressives” deem worthy.

  • Evji108

    Straight White Sausage Festival, no black or gay sausages allowed.

  • Ben Dover


    I couldn’t even guess what BJ’s reaction to this would be. But he outdid himself. Wow.

    Anyway…. I was going to say that considering Queerty’s self-hating homophobic fascination with straight guys, Queerty should send a reporter there.

  • Cam

    @BJ McFrisky: said… “I’m stunned by the reactions to this. Whatever happened to “live and let live”? Whatever happened to “tolerance”?”

    I have this question for the group. Is anybody here “Stunned” that BJ’s automatic response was to use any excuse to again attack the gay community?

  • BJ McFrisky

    @Cam: I have a better question: Why is it that you turn every story into an issue about me?

  • Arkansassy

    Good for them. Everyone should be proud of who they are. If they want a festival to celebrate their identity, then they should go for. Wish them all the best!

  • Cam

    @BJ McFrisky:

    Actually BJ, you manage to turn every story to you and your automatic stance against “The Gays” in every posting.

    But please, keep on typing out your fake outrage that parrots the bigots line about how intolerant gay people are. I mean, we’ve all heard it from you for ages but you never know, maybe there is a new person or two on here who haven’t read your constant positioning that gays are always wrong.

    As for the festival, again, no straight guy cares enough about this stuff who doesn’t have a bigger worry, or isn’t hiding their closeted status. My straight friends wouldn’t waste the time going to hang out in a park….with a bunch of other guys they don’t know……..sounds kinda….gay doesn’t it?

  • Dxley

    The ass-hurt over this is stupid. The queens of Queerty are now looking for reasons to point that would make these guys appear gay. Straight men do enjoy each other’s company and this isn’t illegal and if it makes them sleep at night, I’m all for it regardless of their intent, bad or good, but it’s not hurting anyone. I think it’s a good thing that you people always assume every “intolerant” person to be gay, because it just shows how much the tolerance the gay community lacks and we all know it!

  • Cam


    Gee, what a shock, the other screename comes on to back up the point.

    Additionally, it’s always funny how BOTH of the screenames always try to lie about the actual things being discussed.

    Nobody said straight men don’t enjoy each other’s company. But no straight guy is going to head out to a specially organized event to meet up with a bunch of strangers just because they want to make a point about gay pride events. Straight guys, if they want to hang out with other guys….they call their friends.

    Oh, and I almost forgot, if you are trying to pretend to be gay on a gay blog, you may want to cut down the use of “You People” AND try to vary your writing style from your other screename.

  • DickieJohnson

    Gee, fellas, all this negative BlahBlahBlah BS, and we don’t even know if this thing is for real, or just a big joke! Get a grip, bitches!

  • Gman23

    Something tells me that a gay closeted dude will be amongst the crowd even thought they are rallying the troops of only straight people. That is the irony and stupidity of bigotry.

  • Gman23

    @dxley there is a difference between letting people walk all over you and you being intolerant. It’s ok for so called heterosexuals to walk all over gay people, and when they speak up, then the gay people are the intolerant ones. Very hypocritical. Can you show us how you are so tolerant? Please do.

  • Gman23

    @Arkansassy – I agree but not if part of their celebration is to put down other people not like them. Then that isn’t celebration but more of a protest and being a Nazi.

  • Dxley

    @Gman23: “so-called heterosexuals”, you say? Why can’t it be “so-called homosexuals”? I know why: because gay people think being gay is a bad thing. That’s why!

  • Gman23

    @Dxley: not sure if I follow you. Not sure if you meant to say “…gay people think being straight is a bad thing” in stead of gay. But I say “so-called heterosexuals” in the sense that the person is really gay but hiding it and proclaiming to be heterosexual. So I wouldn’t say “so-called homosexuals” because I highly doubt that there are straight people out there saying that they are gay but in reality they are not. It doesn’t seem to work that way. I’ve never heard of a straight person trying to pretend they were gay. But in reality, you have the opposite, you have gay people who are trying to pretend to be straight people – so they are the “so-called straight” people. I agree, it kind of sounds bad and intolerant, bigoted, etc…but it is just the reality of the situation. You don’t have “so-called homosexuals” because nobody straight is trying to pass of as a gay person. Unless that is you?

  • Cam


    And again, the “Other” screename comes on and once again attacks gay people.

    What a shock.

  • Gman23

    I don’t think the question should be that this event is not of any validity, I think the question should be whether the event is to put down gay or non-white people. Go ahead celebrate your straightness or whiteness but not by saying that gay is bad or black or Latino is bad. One ounce or drop of anti anything would be unacceptable and no longer is a celebration but a protest. So typically, when you are protesting something there is an opposition to that protest, so the whole event brings out negativity. If they can stay positive and celebrate then no one should be against this.

    The alternative would be to have a gay pride parade and instead of celebrating inclusion and diversity and acceptance and pride, we turn it into the “straight people are bad and over populating and causing 99% of the problems in this world” then I think even gays would have to question the Gay Pride Parade.

  • Dxley

    Cam, I don’t mean to rude but would you just shut the fuck up? Please!

    It’s trouble enough using one profile. Why would I have multiple profiles? Just to piss you off? Come on, man.

  • Dxley

    …to [be] …

  • IcarusD

    @BJ McFrisky: Yes, of course there are any number of parades that are not for oppressed minorities. But your examples are bad ones. The St. Patrick’s Day parades, for example, didn’t come from Ireland. The actual parades (as opposed to fasting and going to church) originated in Boston in 1737 as a way for Irish Americans — who were considerably oppressed and denied employment in the New World — to show their growing political strength and solidarity, and their pride in their heritage in the face of oppression. The first actual St. Patrick’s Day parades in Ireland didn’t come for another 200 years.

    Sure, most people nowadays don’t think of Irish people in the U.S. as particularly oppressed and yet the parades remain. And have degenerated into a booze-fest. But similar arguments can be made about Gay Pride parades.

    Perhaps Flag Day would have been a better example for you to use.

  • Cam


    And again, unable to deal with the subject of the post. Both of your names are so similar. ;)

Comments are closed.