A successful beauty vlogger has revealed to her followers she is trans. Nikkie de Jager, 25, who is better known by the name of her YouTube channel, NikkieTutorials, has amassed 12.5 million subscribers. Most assumed she was a cis woman.
However, in a video posted yesterday, Nikkie revealed she is trans and embarked on her transition journey from a young age.
She also went on to say that she felt forced to make the video as she was being threatened by others to out her.
Nikkie de Jager was born in the Netherlands but is now based in the US. She posted the video yesterday and it’s already had 1.7million upticks on YouTube. An Instagram posting has had millions of likes.
“I’ve always wanted to share with you but under my own circumstances,’ she begins by saying, “and it looks like that chance has been taken away from me. So today, I am taking back my own and I have to tell you something.
“When I was younger, I was born in the wrong body, which means that I am transgender.
“Filming this video is scary, but it’s so liberating and freeing…I’m NikkieTutorials, and I am Nikkie. I am me. We don’t need labels.”
She goes on to say that when her mom was pregnant, she was convinced she was having a girl.
“Little did she know she was actually having a girl. Growing up, I think the number one thing I’m the most thankful for is my mom — love you, Mom — because she has been there for me since day one.”
She says her mom thought when Nikkie was growing up, that she would be “gay or a different type of story… and it was a different type of story.”
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She says she began to grow her hair out at the age of six and began dressing as a girl at the age of seven.
“Some kids got it, and other kids in my class did not, which is fine. But I will always be so thankful for all the teachers at that school who supported my journey and supported me.”
She said transitioning is hard. She said she often felt trapped and felt angry, asking “why me?” She said having to constantly come out to new people was difficult, which was why coming out now was so liberating.
She says she began taking hormones at 14, along with growth stoppers to stop her growing any taller as she was already a “tall bitch.”
“By the age of 19, I fully transitioned. I transitioned while I was on YouTube. I have grown up and transformed into me in front of all of you.”
She goes on to talk about her relationship. She is dating a man called Dylan and says he is aware she is trans.
“He is truly the most kind-hearted man in my life ever,” she says, getting emotional. “Our relationship moved so fast.
“Trusting someone enough to be fully you is flippin’ scary, so for me, I wait until I tell my full story until I know I’m in good hands because people out there are scary and dangerous.
“So Dylan and I, we clicked. And he didn’t know. He knows now. He knows about my past, but I wish I’d told him sooner. Everything felt so magical, so good, that I was afraid to lose him if I were to tell my full story.”
She says when she did tell Dylan, “Of course, he was shocked, but that is a private matter that we’re dealing with.”
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She goes on to say that she was making the video because some people wanted to “leak” the story to news outlets.
“I have been blackmailed by people who wanted to leak my story the press, and at first it was frightening…that there are people so evil that they can’t respect someone’s true identity. It is vile, it is gross.”
She goes on to conclude that she hopes her followers do not look at her differently and thanks them for their support.
“Today is the day I am free, finally.
“The last thing I want for you [is] to not trust me anymore or look at me with different eyes or look at me in a different matter or think that I have changed…I am still Nikkie. The reason why the trans side of me never got to the light was I wanted my channel to be about my art.
“This feels liberating and freeing, but I, at the end of the day, am still Nikkie.”
She gives her followers a ‘Dutch word of the day’ (one of the regular part of her videos). The word is ‘Vrouw’ – (pronounced ‘thr-owww’) the Dutch word for woman.
“If you feel that you’re trapped and there’s no way out, know that it gets better.”