Taco Bell Gay Attack Madness!

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Homophobia’s a poppin’ in Indiana. Earlier this week a senate sub-committee forwarded an anti-gay-nup amendment and yesterday came news that known homosexual Charles E. Dayton has filed a $1 million lawsuit against Taco Bell after being assaulted by two of the fine restaurant’s employees.

It all started way back on December 15, 2005, when Dayton popped into his neighborhood Hobart, Indiana, Taco Bell for a bit of their oh-so-delicious and oh-so-economic meals. He got an earful of homo-haterade from not-so model employee, Amber Barnes. Apparently not one for the ‘mos, Barnes refused him service, called him, as Glenn Beck would say, “naughty” names and then kicked his ride as he made his getaway.

Months later, on September 22, 2006, Dayton took another run to the border and went to the same Taco Bell (there’s something to be said about persistence, no?). On this occasion, Dayton not only got a bit of vengeful vernacular (including the lovely, “Get AIDS and die!), but a few swift hits to the face from another staffer named Joseph Shinkle.

Obviously something had to be done, so Dayton called both the police and Taco Bell. The police filed a battery report against Shinkle. In response to the report, Shinkle did what any self-respecting criminal would do: he ignored it. He failed to show up to two hearings and the police issued a warrant for his arrest.

Meanwhile, Dayton rang Taco Bell’s corporate headquarters and was told a district manager would get back to him. The poor trusting fool waited for weeks, but that phone call never came. Now Dayton’s taking them to court. While definitely a nuisance, the incidents, particularly the Shinkle attack, caused minor injuries, missed work and an immeasurable amount of “emotional and mental anguish”. Of the case, Dayton’s lawyer, Todd M. Conover, esquire says:

It’s hard to believe that this kind of thing would happen. I believe Taco Bell should be made to answer for the acts of its employees.

Well, it’s not really that hard to believe “this kind of thing” could go down. It does happen all the time – and Indiana’s not exactly making a name for it’s homo-loving ways.

As for Taco Bell being held financially responsible for its two employees’ actions – we’re not sure that’s going to hold up in court. But, of course, we’re not lawyers. Whether or not they should have to cough up the $1 million. Well, that’s debatable. Surely it’s not their fault Barnes and Shinkle suck figurative ass and hate on those who suck literal ass, but they really could have done more to quell Dayton’s distress. Also, the Bell’s got loads of cash – a million’s not exactly breaking the bank.

Good thing Dayton only incurred the aforementioned emotional and mental anguish, what if it had been suffering and anguish. That’s be at least $5 million.

(Thanks to Christopher from Urban Semiotic for the heads-up.)