“Following on from the baby announcement post, I wanna just also say, get a few things off my chest. The majority of the comments have been so, so lovely. So lovely. There were a fair amount of really nasty ones and I wanna make it really clear that I am on cloud nine. So is my husband. You really can’t knock us down. I don’t feel the thing that you clearly want me to feel. We feel just so happy and so grateful and we’re full of so much love. I wish you were full of more love instead of being incredibly bitter. For all of those who are asking or really angrily saying we should have adopted instead of surrogacy. A lot of you have your own kids. If you’re so upset about me having my own children, you can adopt. Please go ahead and adopt. It’s a wonderful thing to be able to do. You don’t know our story. You don’t know why we are going through the surrogacy process instead of adopting. And for those who are saying that I am exploiting a woman’s body, I wanna make it really clear: I didn’t just grab someone off the street and kidnap her and get her pregnant. This was somebody that we care about very much, who wanted to do this for us, who was generous enough to help us have our absolute dream and to raise a family. So you don’t really have to worry about our surrogate. I promise, she’s fine. We are taking very good care of her. I promise, she wanted to do this. She wanted to do this for us because, even though as many said, the baby’s not going to have a mother–believe me, we are gonna love this child so much more than one could ever possibly imagine. He will be plenty loved even without a mother.”—Queer Eye star and dad-to-be Tan France via Instagram Stories pushing back against critics of he and his husband having a child through surrogacy. Though response to the announcement that the couple is expecting was overwhelmingly positive, detractors attacked them for raising a child as a same-sex couple, and for using a surrogate rather than adopting. France went on to criticize anonymous, online critics for cowardice and for being “twats.”
Chrisk
Yes I have no doubt she wanted to do this for you but at a very special price. No one carries a kid without serious compensation so leave out the flowerily bullshit.
I totally agree with the others. There’s currently 400, 000 kids that need homes just in the US but you guys had to have your special puppy from the puppymile. How special is that. Gag.
As I’ve said before. This is a game for the rich queers as most of us don’t have the 100k -150k sitting around for BS like this.
whatsaywhat
So TF what if they’re rich and so what if their surrogate was paid? Who are you to judge them or her?
As he said- you yourself are free to adopt a kid. That way, when you open your judgmental, sanctimonious mouth to sh*t all over other people, their decisions, and their families, you’ll actually have some skin in the game.
Liquid Silver
Mostly, I just don’t GAF one way or the other.
My cousin bought a baby because (obese and unemployable) her and her (obese and eternally ill, but employed) husband went through an (expensive) faith-based place to do so and harassed the family for money to do it. My husband and I just gave them our literal two cents (no, they seriously thought we made a mistake and called us about it).
They still harass the family for gifts and whatnot for every occasion. “Baptism” “First Shoes” “First Vomit.” It’s annoying.
At least they adopted, but even here… Grr.
Cam
If you are going to lob that complaint at him then you would need to lob it at every single straight couple that has a child and doesn’t adopt.
Fahd
Buying a baby is something that has been going on since forever. With technology, one can now use one’s own sperm, etc, The practice has become more widespread as consumer driven capitalism has evolved. To me, normalizing the practice is a little dicey, but I think a Rolls-Royce is unnecessary and ostentatious. I wouldn’t have a child in this way.
But I think to shun or stigmatize parents who have had children in this way can easily spill over to the innocent offspring, and to me that is an injustice.
There’s such a thing as oversharing, however. When the time comes, why not just tell the world you have a new baby, and keep the details for a private inner circle? There are all kinds out there – why put your child on the haters’ radars?
whatsaywhat
What a message for the children of the gay community: When faced prejudice, close mindedness and the bigotry, keep everything quiet except for your own private inner circle! Cower before the haters and their stupid, sh*tty opinions!!
That’s exactly how the gay community won acceptance, right?
Kangol2
@whatsaywhat, are you missing the irony of your comment? Weren’t you just defending and praising Colton Underwood, and claiming that criticism of him was “woke” outrage? Because he did exactly this: “When faced prejudice, close mindedness and the bigotry, keep everything quiet except for your own private inner circle! Cower before the haters and their stupid, sh*tty opinions!!” He did not come out and fronted as straight on national TV, more than once. Does he get a pass because he’s a young, buff White dude you find attractive? Are you engaging in “woke” outrage in response to Fahd?
Fahd
@whatsaywhat
I would recommend the same to a non-gay couple that had a child in this way. I just think it’s best for the innocent child for the parents not to put the details of the conception and gestation on open social networks. I would want to protect any child from the social networks. But it’s just how I would handle it; you can do what you want, of course.
whatsaywhat
@Kangol2
Show me where I was “defending and praising Colton Underwood”.
My complaint is with the critics: How dare Colton Underwood be hot, young and buff! How dare someone have the means to have a family via surrogacy… they should be scorned and cancelled!!
This loathing is quite obviously rooted in the same thing: a petty little human emotion called ENVY.
If I were Colotn Underwood or a father of a surrogate child, I would say the saem thing to the haters: PISS THE F*CK OFF
Liquid Silver
Agreed. I don’t care how the sperm ended up in the uterus, or which uterus. Don’t share this with me. Don’t ask me for money. If we know each other well enough, that might be a different story, but not, usually, over the Internet.
I just don’t care, don’t want to hear about it, and don’t really need to know the state of somebody else’s innards.
Fahd
@whatsaywhat
I would recommend the same to a non-gay couple that had a child in this way. I just think it’s best for the child. But it’s just me; you can do what you want, of course.
JRamonMc
Congratulations to both dad’s, and mom whom I’m sure will be a part of this child’s life.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again after reading the comments. We are our own worst enemy when it comes to the gay community and how we treat each other.
Fahd
The comments here are a good example: I’d want to avoid the chance of putting an innocent child in the middle of such back and forth; but to each his own. How did Elton John handle it?
Manrico Jimenez
All of these Social Justice Warriors coming at Tan France for thinking that surrogacy is “exploitation of women” need to do their research into the ethics involved in modern Assistive Reproductive industry especially in the United States and Canada. This isn’t the wild west and a lot of care is taken to make sure that prospective gestational carriers are properly vetted, reimbursed, and compensated.
Liquid Silver
Most SJWs need to be taken out and given a good lessoning on minding their own business before minding somebody else’s. I’ve often threatened to start minding an SJW’s business. That usually either shuts them up or starts them whining on how I’m about to stalk them. The lack of insight and hypocrisy amazes.
If somebody wants to surrogate, great.
If somebody wants to sperm donate, great.
Just know the consequences of your actions before you perform them, regardless of what those actions happen to be.
Cam
Complain all you want about people, but you kind of give yourself away when you repeat Fox News catchphrases.