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While Married at First Sight UK didn’t end up making the perfect love match for Thomas Hartley, he’s far from done with making romantic revelations.
The podcaster recently took to Instagram to declare what he’s know about himself for some time now: he’s pansexual!
He also revealed that he came out to his ex-husband during their time on the show, but that the bit was left out of the final product because “they have to condense hours of filming to one hour.”
As he writes, “I am at the beginning of this journey and I am more confident than I have ever been before”:
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He further clarifies, “although I resonate more so with dating cis and trans men, I do find cis and trans women attractive too.”
Related: Reality TV star, former Mr International USA, David Barta comes out
Hartley followed the video post with definitions of pansexuality, including one referring to the sexuality as “someone who can love someone for who they are, not what they are.”
In his own words to The Liverpool Echo, he states “It doesn’t require somebody to be a specific gender for me to find them sexually attractive…I’m just not closed off to anyone, it’s about the person over anything else.”
Though some of his definitions aren’t terribly generous to bisexuality, he did qualify some of his thoughts on the differences — and similarities — between the two.
“There isn’t a specific difference between bisexual and pansexual,” he continues. “Now that gender is a much broader spectrum, the word pansexual was introduced. It’s whatever somebody’s comfortable with. If somebody referred to me as bisexual I’m good with that too; labels don’t hold power over me.”
While there are plenty of bi+ identities like pansexual, omnisexual, and polysexual, specific differences are largely individual and share commonalities with one another.
Related: Pansexual comedian legally changed name to Hugo Boss to piss off company
If his dancing is anything to go off of, it seems like the MAFS alum is less interested in splitting hairs in queer discourse than he is in celebrating and living his truth out loud.
Scroll down for more pics from Hartley’s Instagram page…
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m
Hot dude
thebaddestbabby
him?
Neoprene
When will he come out as a narcissist? The real issue for most of these kiddos.
greekboy
The only thing I object to is in pic# 2…the fag. Smoking is nothing more than killing yourself slowly
alfred
Eyeroll. So why did he #gayman on that coming out? Jeez he is a hypocrite; wanting attention and validation for his meme sexuality (its bisexual if you like men and women regardless of ‘gender’) while also using the gay label.
Donston
Sometimes people embrace both gay and bi/pan identities. If they’re overall romantic and commitment leanings are homo then many will still feel comfortable with “gay”. No doubt that like a lot of these “reality stars” though, he’s very cringe and comes off narcissistic.
Jack Meoff
Lord help us, another one.
Rikki Roze
Who cares.
Donston
I do understand why some gay-presenting men who experience degrees of fluidity or learn more about their dimensions as they get older feel the need of clarify their queerness. Sometimes it is more about desperately wanting to detach from “gay” (despite often still living mostly homo lifestyles and still mostly having only legit relationships with cis males). But I do get it. However, there doesn’t seem to be any reality show that attracts more attention whores than MAFS. While him claiming to have “just discovered” his dimensions before going on the show is kinda eye-rolling.
Donston
The network likely didn’t air it because it didn’t inspire the drama that he thought it would. He probably got a very meh reaction.
Everyone’s dimensions, struggles and journeys are their own. But I am getting tired of queers exploiting their dimensions and identities for some quick attention and clout, especially for reality TV. But I guess it’s expected from people willing to marry someone that they just met in order to get on a TV show.
Caelestius
Yes. It’s a brave act to come out as your authentic self if that self is hated and degraded in the larger world. But our once-heroic gesture is under misappropriation. Narcissism is not courageous, it’s boring. And hogging the community’s attention for selfish and trivial goals actually pushes our real issues out of the spotlight.
Caelestius
Right, And his pronouns are Who, why, whatever. When gender granularity begins to sound, smell and generally seem like granularized agenda with a gender prefix then perhaps we’re dealing with self-inflation and its grivialization of real lives, which must navigate a painfully real world. I support, enthusiastically, self-determination as an inborn human right in the complement of liberty, equality, sanctity and dignity of the individual in the social contract, and a fundamental element of sovereignty for every nation. These principles grew from the tumult of the Enlightenment, which itself had been seeded by ideas from Greco-Roman antiquity, including engagement with Jewish, Indo-Persian, Byzanto-Turkic and Ibero-Islamic thinkers and philosophies. In that historic context of many brave, brilliant ancestors forging a path of survival to our era, the look-at-me, agendagranularity of selfie-obssessed, “whatever, boomer,” meme-addicted Bratland now commodifying queer culture is idiotic, and offensive to people who desire meaningful lives, and who demand an end to the ugly, unjustified limits and murderous contempt of homophobia, transphobia, racism and misogyny.
James
I find it hard to believe he is bisexual.
GayEGO
Oh my! All kinds of sexuality are out now, I wonder if the usual LGBTQ reference to gays is no longer useful!