Strength. Intellect. Courage. Passion. These very attractive qualities are shared by the ten people Queerty believes are among the sexiest gay men living with HIV today–and there are a lot, a lot, from which to chose.
The list is a mixture of hotties and living history, each of whom combine elements of both. All of them are fighting HIV stigma by speaking out and acting up. We could have easily multiplied the list by hundreds if not thousands, with all the worthy HIV advocates involved in important work today.
How did we do? And more importantly, who did we forget?
1. Hussain Turk
Talk about brains. Hussain is not only a student at the University of California, Los Angeles, School of Law, but also writes prolifically about living with HIV and being Muslim. Hussain has plenty of experience smashing stereotypes of all kinds. His most recent projects have included being a part of a Queer Muslim Collective and launching the Muslim Alliance for Sexual and Gender Diversity. A huge brain goes a long way in our book. The smoldering good looks are icing on the cake.
2. Greg Louganis
Greg stole our hearts a generation ago as an Olympic diver and sports icon, when he became the first man to sweep the diving medals in two consecutive Olympic games. There are plenty of mouth-watering photos of Greg from that era (Google awaits), but he has shown just as much grace and courage in more recent years, using his notoriety to promote everything from same sex marriage to his love of animals. He came out as someone living with HIV during a 1995 Oprah interview. And hey, when they get Mario Lopez to play you in the movie of your life, your sex appeal is a fact that cannot be denied.
3. Chanse D. Kyle
At only 19 years old, Chanse D. Kyle is the youngest on our list, but his love life is all set, thank you. He and his boyfriend Josh, also 19, have been advocating for better HIV awareness since Chanse tested HIV positive at a local clinic in his hometown of Shreveport, Louisiana. He and Josh, who is HIV negative, immediately went to work to provide the kind of HIV education to their peers that they never had themselves. When a profile of Chanse and Josh appeared on Queerty last month, much of the reaction was critical, but Chanse takes it all in stride. “I love my boyfriend, and I’m trying to make a difference,” he told us. “Life looks pretty good so far.”
4. Sean Strub
If there is ever a Mount Rushmore of HIV activism, they might as well start carving his face right now. Sean Strub went from an adorable cornfed boy from Iowa to the halls of the United States congress to the ACT UP streets of New York City in the 1980’s. Along the way he founded POZ Magazine, became the first openly positive congressional candidate, and told his story in the moving must-read book, Body Counts: A Memoir of Politics, AIDS, Sex and Survival. He is widely considered among the leading voice in the world today on the rights of those living with HIV. Taking a stand and giving an entire community a voice is something we find awfully sexy.
5. Craig Washington
Don’t mess with a strong southern gentleman, especially one as dapper (and ferocious) as Craig Washington. For more than twenty years, Craig has worked to build community among black gay men and do something about the high rates of infection in the south. His career at AID Atlanta alone is worthy of inclusion in this list, but Craig has dug much deeper, using the inspiration of Bayard Rustin, the gay assistant to Dr. Martin Luther King, to create the Bayard Rustin-Audre Lorde Breakfast. Acting with charity and concern for others is damn sexy indeed.
6. Nelson Vergel
The very first book that addressed longevity with AIDS through nutrition, exercise, and complimentary medications was Built to Survive, and it became a staple on the nightstand of people living with HIV. It was written by hunky Venezuelan bodybuilder Nelson Vergel, and his efforts to educate people with HIV about diet and exercise continues to this day. Nelson continues his advocacy through his popular site, ExcelMale, which addresses men’s health issues, and he makes regular appearances in HIV forums to share his passion for physical fitness. Muscles sure are sexy. Almost as much as a lifelong commitment to our community.
7. Peter Staley
If you’re HIV positive and are using successful medications, you can thank activists like Peter Staley, who took to the streets in the 1980’s and demanded our government pay attention to the AIDS epidemic and approve life-saving drugs to treat it. Peter never let his privilege as a young, gorgeous Fire Island vacationer get in the way of his activism, and as he has matured his work has only deepened and found an even wider audience. How to Survive a Plague, the documentary about ACT UP that include Peter’s exploits, was nominated for an Academy Award last year. And yes, walking the red carpet at the Oscars is a very sexy thing to do. Peter has also funded his own anti-meth campaigns aimed at gay men, knowing the role the drug plays in new infections.
8. Patrick Ingram
Those bedroom eyes belong to a very thoughtful young man. Patrick Ingram has been writing with unerring honesty about living with HIV for the last few years, and has become a leading voice of young gay men living with the virus. He founded ThePozLife, a web site giving voice to a multitude of people living with HIV. Patrick has written movingly about everything from disclosing to family to negotiating relationships, and bracing honesty is a quality any sexy man should possess.
9. Jack Mackenroth
Jack Mackenroth has been shedding his clothes in the service of HIV awareness for a decade. And thank God for that. The physique model and former Project Runway contestant just raised $50,000 for the Braking AIDS Ride in New York (he posted pictures of his body scrawled with the names of major donors), and his latest project just went viral: the shower selfie #weareALLclean social media campaign that asks us to strip in the shower to demonstrate that we are all, positive and negative, “clean” and should live free of stigma. There’s something about the sly, winking attitude of Jack’s (often naked) efforts that makes him feel like the friendly, playful jock next door. And a sense of humor about ourselves is always a sexy attribute.
10. Larry Kramer
Of course. No other person with HIV has so many HIV activists thinking “oh, Daddy!” And our attraction to Larry has everything to do with a fierce intelligence and his history of calling out the forces that would deny an end to AIDS – including the gay community itself. From his historic, blistering play The Normal Heart, written during the dawn of AIDS, to his founding of ACT UP and Gay Men’s Health Crisis, his place in history is assured. Even when he runs afoul of current activist thinking, such as his skepticism of pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP), Larry has shown that this lion in winter still knows how to roar.
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
Jimmy, Billy, George, Don, Scott, Dennis, Teddy, Chris……..If only you guys could have held on for a couple of years……………. 🙁
Merv
I can understand people who get HIV and then become AIDS activists. I’ll never understand people who were AIDS activists first and then got HIV.
sdsinmpls
So those of us who are living with HIV but are quietly living our lives, work hard everyday, are not public figures, and may not be as handsome as these men are not sexy and don’t count? Really?
alex
@sdsinmpls: Wow, you really are _searching_ for something to criticize sdsinmpls, and FYI you still haven’t found it. The article says nothing negative about “everyday” people with HIV. You seem to just have a problem with the idea of picking any 10 people to highlight.
I’m glad that Queerty put together a list to recognize those ten people and put another crack in the negative stigma attached to people living with HIV.
LuckyboyLA
@alex I agree 150%. I’m 61, Poz since 1983. There’s sites that highlight long time people living with HIV. Nobody wants to see my Mug on Queerty, lol. But I’m still sexually active in my scene and happy to be around still. Seems someone has self image issues and/or is just a Hot Man Hat8r. No one is stopping you from being an activist in Minneapolis is there?
michaelh
I thin@alex:
I unfortunately need to disagree. In my humble opinion, the aim is to de-stigmatize HIV. this list completely invalidates that in my opinion. May as well make another list for “attractive asian men.” and see how that pans out.
M K
I’m certainly glad that these guys and others that are a lot less famous and handsome are living a healthy life…. but what concerns me is the message that it sends to so many others – young and old(er) alike – that we should honor and highlight the great lives people can live who made poor decisions in the past. I have encountered many younger guys that have such a lax attitude toward HIV/AIDS and don’t take precautions (some even looking to get infected) because all they have to do is ‘take a pill’ so they can just be careless about their sexual activities. That is not the message to send. What I would have liked to have seen in this article, is a statement by Queerty (and those highlighted) is that while they are surviving and living a meaningful life, they are not to be imitated and if they could take away their HIV status they would.
Now with PreP guys are becoming even more ‘immune’ to being infected… again, take a pill and all is fine…. NOT!
Realityis
I have a question for the writer of this article. How do you justify your disease as being fabulous? Do you not suffer from one of the many side effects that the meds cause? Lipodystrophy, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, peripheral neuropathy… to name a few.
Every time I read that line I feel like you are slapping me in the face and telling me that this disease has something good to it. Let me tell you that it doesn’t. I hate being HIV + and have hated it every day for the last 20 years. I’d give both of my balls to be HIV – again.
Why do people like you and Jack Macenroth, who I watched on project runway and cried when he what I thought at the time was a genuine coming out with HIV moment (but most likely a publicity stunt) have to keep glamorizing this disease? It is not glamorous. It’s a disease that most of us got becus we were either drunk, high, or lied to.
I’m not saying that men who have HIV aren’t sexy but I am saying that HIV is not.
I’ve got years of experience knowing that.
Mark
@Realityis: I’ll be happy to answer your question about my blog title, Realityis.
For years I felt the baggage associated with living with HIV being thrust upon me and defining me. The veiled judgments, the stigma, even the pity (I’ve been positive for 30 years). I decided that if this virus was going to inhabit my body, it was going to take on MY characteristics, not the other way around. And I’m fabulous. So I named my blog My Fabulous Disease. It might seem provocative, but it’s done in good humor, and if anything has sustained me these 30 years, it’s a sense of humor! Plenty of people write about the very real challenges of HIV infection, including me. But not enough people share the joy of being fully engaged in the joy of life as an HIV positive person, and that’s the point of view I try to share.
I’m proud of Jack for his efforts. Every day people stare at hot naked men, including on Queerty. Knowing one of them is openly HIV positive dispels the notion that we’re sickly or unattractive or should hide from our community. Also, please know that Jack left Project Runway quite unexpectedly, as the result of a serious infection that required care. That situation forced his hand to come out as positive. Sometimes, even reality television is actual reality! Thanks for your comment.
Realityis
@Mark: Do you realize how other people, including me, who are seriously struggling with the side effects that this disease, and the meds, have caused may see your tag line as being a trivial response to a devastating disease?
If I don’t see the humor in it, I am sure there are countless others who don’t either. I don’t know if you have liposdystrophy in any shape or form, but it is hard to feel happy about it or to “have it take on MY characteristics”.
I know why Mr. Macenroth had to leave the show but I am sick and tired of this glamorization of HIV and that’s all he seems to know how to do. I wish you guys would focus your energy on getting big pharma to bring out the cure instead of putting forth this narcissitic, shallow crap. BTW, it would have been a better gesture if you used normal people instead of somewhat famous people. At least then I might have taken the article seriously. I mean most of these guys probably could afford the thousands of dollars I have spent trying to correct my body shape changes.
I’m happy for you for being so comfortable with your disease. Please just know that others aren’t comfortable with this disease and question anyone who calls it fabulous.
Tracy Pope
@M K: you said “but what concerns me is the message that it sends to so many others – young and old(er) alike – that we should honor and highlight the great lives people can live who made poor decisions in the past.”
M K, the world is full of celebrations of people doing well after making poor decisions in the past but, more importantly, the kind of thinking in your statement is part of the problem. It falls right in with stigmatizing everyone living with HIV/AIDS. Our community (LGBT) is already bombarded from outside for everything from wanting to be treated equally to simply being ourselves. Attacks from within really brings nothing constructive to the discussion.
Mark
@Realityis: I have suffered lipodystrophy, been hospitalized more than once,and endured serious medication side effects — and only after burying my best friends more than twenty years ago (and written about all of it, including the current Queerty posting, “Once, When Gay Men Were Heroes,” which might resonate with you). And yet I maintain my sense of humor. What works for me isn’t a dismissal of your pain or even my own. It’s my coping mechanism. I understand your point of view, and of course you’re entitled to it. I wish you well.
jwtraveler
AIDS isn’t sexy. It’s an incurable life-threatening disease. It’s one thing to de-stigmatize people; quite another to de-stigmatize the disease. Articles like this glorify AIDS; they make it seems desirable and exciting, just as death-wish porn eroticizes HIV infection. How about an article honoring all the bright, successful, attractive gay men who have been careful, responsible and self-respecting enough to avoid HIV infection by practicing infection-prevention while enjoying fulfilling relationships and sex lives?
ccrb
@jwtraveler:
And there’s the exact stigma that this article is trying to dispel.
People with HIV/AIDS aren’t any less careful, responsible or self respecting than anyone else, I’m appalled that you’d even write such a thing. They are unlucky at worst.
Making assumptions as to how these guys (or anyone) contracted the virus and judging them for that is one of the reasons why still today in 2014 we have people embarrassed to speak out and get the help and treatment they deserve.
I guess we should call all people in car traffic accidents as careless, or people with lung cancer as self deprecating. We don’t. And nor should we be calling anyone with HIV/AIDS anything like that either.
matt
@Merv: Wow, I was so shocked with your comment that I had to sign up for this site, just to reply to you.
I hope you realise you can get HIV from other things than unsafe sex and sharing dirty needles right? For all you know, these guys got it through blood transfusions (sure, pretty low chance but it’s still there), got stabbed with a needle by a junkie with HIV/AIDS (not an uncommon thing to happen in healthcare) or their mother had aids/hiv during breastfeeding?
Heck, they even could have had a partner that knew/didn’t knew he/she was infected. Unless you have safe sex for the rest of your life with your partner, it’ll eventually get to you if they have it.
jason smeds
The people who have died from AIDS have usually been those who damaged their immune systems through the use of drugs. Drugs can damage the immune system quite easily. Even if you don’t have HIV, you can develop a terminal immune deficiency due to drug usage alone.
Mateo
@Merv: Merv, that actually applies to some of the most famous activists. Many of the men in How to Survive a Plague in the Treatment and Data group actually seroconverted *after* we knew that unprotected anal sex transmitted HIV.
Merv
@matt: I’m not sure why you’re shocked. Let’s not kid ourselves: Very few AIDS activists who got infected after becoming AIDS activists got that way through blood transfusions or needle pricks. The vast majority are gay men who continued to have unsafe sex even after they knew better. Part of the reason our record of stopping the spread of HIV is so abysmal in the gay community is that we are not frank about the reason it continues to spread.
@Mateo: Thank you for confirming what I suspected. It’s weird how little we talk about the phenomenon, when it actually has quite important implications for how we combat the spread of HIV in the community.
Matt
@Mateo: When gay men started getting “cancer” it was very obvious how they were getting it. The best thing you can do is ignore activists.
kw91
Many readers seem to think that this article glorifies AIDS; I don’t see how. I just want to say that from my point of view, what I am getting from the article is mostly education. I now know all of those guys and the important work they’ve done. I see 10 men who are standing tall and pushing forward in spite of a serious health issue. I see 10 men who are not only working hard (like millions of HIV positive people who aren’t in an article) but are blessed with the energy and/or resources to do very public things that help others. I see hope for those who may be younger or sicker than these guys are in these photos, hope that HIV+ people can live long productive healthy lives, and maybe that can be inspirational to others. I can’t imagine someone reading this article and thinking HIV is ok, or no big deal; on the contrary I think this article shows that there are people out there working very hard and baring their personal details to the world for the sake of helping educate others about HIV. Would you rather see an article bashing those who have HIV and putting them on display as bad examples? Or no articles about it at all? The “sexy men” part of the title got me to click, and the “wow, good for him!” factor got me to keep reading, and the “sexy” part actually fell away and was no longer important once I started reading. 🙂 Peace and good health to all <3
vive
@jwtraveler, @M K, you talk as if people can only get HIV from bad decisions. This isn’t true (e.g., condoms break or partners cheat), but why does it matter? Things happen to us all as a consequence of being human. Why do some people deserve your extra hard judgment just because things happened to them because of sex?
@matt, while I sympathize with what you are trying to do, I think we should reject the idea that some people don’t deserve HIV because they got it innocently, because the hidden meaning of this kind of argument is that other people DO deserve HIV (invariably because of sex).
Matt
@vive: Nobody deserves HIV but there are innocent people like Elizabeth Glaser, Ryan White, and Arthur Ashe who didn’t get it from butt sex or shooting drugs. Rape victims and babies born with it are also innocent. The gay community is well aware that they keep infecting each other with butt sex. Let’s not be naive.
Tracy Pope
@jason smeds: . Yes, regular drug use can tear down the immune system but you just implied that most people who died from HIV/AIDS related causes were drug users. Did you pull that out of your anus? I might get blocked for this but that is just plain stupid.
I love condoms
@kw91: I thought it was absurdly inappropriate for Queerty to run such an article as it’s World’s Aids Day feature. What about highlighting how much work is still needed to prevent the spread of the disease and to curb safe sex complacency.
CDC recently released a report that found that as many as 50,000 Americans are infected with HIV annually. And that only 30 percent of Americans living with HIV have the virus in check, putting others at risk of infection.
The report also found that 840,000 of the 1.2 million people infected with HIV in 2011 were not consistently taking anti-HIV drugs that keeps the virus suppressed at very low levels.
Young people were least likely to have the virus in check, the report found. Only 13 percent of 18-24 year olds achieved viral suppression in 2011, compared to 23 percent of those 25 to 35 years old, 27 percent of those 35 to 44 years old, 34 percent of the people 45 to 54 years old, 36 percent of 55 to 64 year olds, and 37 percent of those 65 and older.
Why is Queerty highlighting these facts?
vive
@Matt, it is a contradiction for you to say that nobody deserves HIV but then single out people who got it from “butt sex” as different from those who are “innocent.” Innocent of what I’m not sure, but presumably you mean of “butt sex,” as if that made someone “guilty” and therefore deserving of the consequences.
vive
@I love condoms, those statistics are an indictment of the sorry investment of the U.S. in public health. It is also an indictment of the large gay organizations who wash their hands of the issue of access to healthcare, which doesn’t interest their rich white donors. You can certainly fault Queerty for not encouraging that conversation, and I would second that. Still, I don’t agree with your criticism of this article.
I love condoms
@ccrb: The reason why many of us make assumptions on how one get’s HIV is because we all know someone who should have known better, but was instead reckless and contracted HIV from lot’s of unprotected anal sex.
I know one of these guys, and now he’s living with the consequences of his reckless ways. He’s also experiencing HIV stigma…not for being HIV POZ, but for being stupid and reckless for contracting HIV when he could have easily protected himself.
Paco
@I love condoms: Stigmatizing a person for being “stupid and reckless for contracting HIV” IS stigmatizing a person for being HIV POZ. Maybe he should just kill himself to please the morally superior gays, such as yourself? How dare people who are poz make the best out of a bad situation. Right? There is certainly no shortage of judgemental twats around to make their burden worse than it already is. Happy to know you are so perfect and without fault.
Matt
@vive: Certain people are innocent. They didn’t shoot drugs or willingly have butt sex but they still wound up with HIV. You butt sex guys keep infecting each other, so yes, you are guilty of infecting men in your own community. Do you know how these 10 men contracted HIV?
I love condoms
@I love condoms: Why is it that we demonize the drug addict or the Crystal Meth head for making bad choices, but when it comes to the gay male making bad sexual health choices we’re suppose to sympathize or give him a free pass for being reckless.
I’m sorry, but you can’t expect people to embrace ignorance and stupidity. Nothing has changed…we’ve known how HIV is contracted for over 30+ years now, and no one is immune from it, therefore if you are reckless and ignore all of the safe-sex warnings, then you can’t be too surprised if you are stigmatized.
If I’m working my butt off to stay negative and disease free 100% of the time, then I don’t sympathize with guys who are reckless.
I love condoms
@Paco: Why is it that we demonize the drug addict or the Crystal Meth head for making bad choices, but when it comes to the gay male making bad sexual health choices we’re suppose to sympathize or give him a free pass for being reckless.
I’m sorry, but you can’t expect people to embrace ignorance and stupidity. Nothing has changed…we’ve known how HIV is contracted for over 30+ years now, and no one is immune from it, therefore if you are reckless and ignore all of the safe-sex warnings, then you can’t be too surprised if you are stigmatized.
If I’m working my butt off to stay negative and disease free 100% of the time, then I don’t sympathize with guys who are reckless.
I love condoms
@Paco: And btw, wanting to not contract a potientally deadly DISEASE has nothing to do with being morally superior.
Paco
@I love condoms: Sure, because you are HIV neg, you have decided to go out of your way to make sure he knows what a reckless piece of sh!t he is. Kick them while they’re down so you can say how much better you are that you aren’t POZ. Got it. By all means continue patting yourself on the back while you show the world what an a$$hole you are.
Paco
@I love condoms: And btw, you can avoid getting a deadly disease without finger pointing and cutting down others with that disease. Doesn’t matter how they got it. They still deserve compassion and the ability to make the most of their lives.
I love condoms
@Paco: Kicking someone when they’re down is not my thing man. I believe in educating someone before making a reckless and avoidable act that will change their life for ever.
My heart bleeds every time I hear about someone (especially a friend) who has become newly POZ. I even question myself as to what more could I have down to prevent them from being so reckless.
It’s really hard for me to show compassion for individuals who ignore conventional wisdom and continue to be reckless and irresponsible.
There are 50,000 new HIV diagnosis’ every year in the U.S….where is the outrage about that?
Paco
@I love condoms: your comments are just one big contradiction from one sentence to the next. Your heart bleeds, yet it’s really hard to show compassion.
Finger pointing and stigmatizing does more to drive up the rate of new infections than an article showcasing Poz guys that are trying to live the best they can. I promise you that every single one is “suffering the consequences” in some form and none of them need to be burdened more.
Worry about preventing the new infections rather than going after those that fell through the cracks.
Merv
Stigmatizing reckless behavior works. It’s one of the reasons that smoking rates have been declining precipitously. Nobody seriously advocates pulling punches in anti-smoking efforts to avoid offending people with lung cancer. As a matter of fact, people suffering from smoking-related illnesses often feature prominently in anti-smoking campaigns. The same reasoning should apply to HIV prevention efforts. I’m tired of the double standard.
I love condoms
@Merv: AMEN Merv!
We stigmatize the smoker, the alcoholic, the crack head, and even the unwed single mom on welfare who continues to have babies, but yet according to @Paco we’re suppose to praise and show compassion to the gay man who is reckless and goes out and fcuks raw and contracts HIV, when it’s so easy to just protect ones self.
I’m so fcuking tired of the double standard too.
Paco
@I love condoms: don’t forget fat people. Sitting all day on one’s butt is the new “smoking” as far as long term impact on health. Not to mention obesity related illnesses are poised to cost the U.S. economy a couple of trillion dollars. Better get busy. The list of human weaknesses to stigmatize is a long one.
vive
@Matt: “Certain people are innocent. They didn’t shoot drugs or willingly have butt sex but they still wound up with HIV. You butt sex guys keep infecting each other, …”
My apologies for responding to you. I forgot you were one of the kooks.
vive
@I love condoms: “… therefore if you are reckless and ignore all of the safe-sex warnings, then you can’t be too surprised if you are stigmatized.”
So if goddess forbid you become positive because of a broken condom, you’d be okay with being stigmatized? Good to know.
vive
@I love condoms, @merv, you have it exactly the wrong way around. People don’t stop smoking or using drugs because they are stigmatized. In fact, people START smoking or doing drugs precisely BECAUSE they are stigmatized – the stigmatization is a big part of what makes young people feel like they are being rebels by smoking or doing drugs. Stigmatization by society is precisely what makes drug use “cool.”
Merv
@vive: Not just stigmatized. It needs to be stigmatized in your peer group. If you were a gay club goer in the 1990s, smoking and drugs weren’t even remotely stigmatized. The same goes for unsafe sex in certain subcultures even today.
I love condoms
@vive: Last time I checked HIV is an incurable disease. If being stigmatized for having unsafe sex, that puts you at risk for HIV and other STDs, leads you to have more unsafe and risky sex, then you most likely have mental health issues that require professional help.
vive
@Merv, @I love condoms, you fail to realize that stigmatization helps absolutely no-one. Nobody has stopped drugs or smoking because of stigmatization. No successful drug rehabilitation program in the world uses stigmatization as a tool. Why not? Because it doesn’t work.
Merv
@vive: Would you claim that stigmatization has had no effect on drunk driving? What about stealing from friends? Clearly, stigmatization works in some cases.
Daphiny
@vive Dear Editor, I know this is mainly a site for just gay males, the obvious lGbt, G capitalized for the obvios reason, means more to our combined commmunity sometimes, but I digress. .There are many in our community living healthy happy and gorgeous other than just the G..I agree everyone who got HIV weren’t out drugging it up in the clubs or bathhouses, some LTS were just with the wrong person at the wrong time back when no one really knew what it was, and that’s not to say anyone who caught it after it was discovered how it was passed deserved it either but by reading these comments the stugmas are still there throughout our whole community sadly, together we are #Unstoppables.. Not trying to start a fight just maybe a discussion of the obvious… Hugs Love & Friendship ..