demographics

The 9 Types of Britney Spears Concert Fans

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OBLIVIOUS MOMS

This one never ceases to amaze me, and yet, they’ve shown up at every concert.

They’re here for the 1998 Britney. Ever since Bethany and Madison were born, Mommy’s been too busy taking them out on play dates, enrolling them in private school, and preparing their lunches to notice that Britney’s turned into a major, major slut.

If it’s not the dirty pole routines and barely-there outfits, it’s the general buffoonery of the crowd that’ll have the moms storming out and demanding a refund about five songs into the show. (This is different from The Old Skank, who may be a mother, but is having a lovely time.)

It’s quite likely The Oblivious Mom will even work up the anger to write a rant for the local paper, disgusted by what they thought would be just a wholesome night out with the kids. After all, Jessica Simpson would never be this distasteful.