The A-List: Dallas Recap: “You Gave Him A Mimosa Facial”

Episode seven of Logo’s The A-List: Dallas is all about the aftermath of last week’s alcohol-soaked, fist-flying, insult-spewing bust-ups between former besties Phillip and James, and ex-lovers Levi and Taylor. Caught in the middle is Princess Ashley, aglow with spray tan and the glory of Jebus, as she tries to pull James back from the brink of drowning his wounded heart in the bottom of a martini glass.

The episode opens with Phillip and Levi sparring in an empty boxing gym; Dallas could a ghost town to judge from how often the ALD castmates interact in virtually deserted venues. Anyway, they trash talk James and then gossip about Taylor the Terrible. Levi is happy to participate. Phillip nonchalantly spills the beans about his own role in provoking Taylor. Even though Levi’s jaw drops at Phillip’s breezy dismissal of his own shit-stirring antics, our laconic cowboy, ever conflict-avoidant, lets him off the hook.

Elsewhere, Ashley takes James for a stroll in the park and tries to talk some sense into his booze-addled brain. But James just isn’t listening. She gingerly broaches the notion of rehab and he is scornful and condescending. “How do I talk to you without you flipping out?” she asks.

Once again, however, Ashley undermines any good will generated by her concern for her friends with a head-spinning whopper of a casual remark. In commenting on her addiction to spray tanning, she wishes aloud that she were half-black and half-Mexican—with a quick amendment that she has to still be white, too. Agh!