gross out

The Face Mike Huckabee Makes When You Force Him To Think About The Disgusting Sex You’re Having

“I’m not a lawyer,” Mike Huckabee tells Judge Andrew Napolitano on Fox Business’ Freedom Watch, but Obama “was legally wrong” in deciding not to defend the constitutionality of the Defense of Marriage Act. It’s certainly not the first nor the last time The Huckster will step up his anti-gay platform to attack the man he hopes to challenge in 2012. But this time around he threw in a new argument: letting DOMA die will inevitably lead to the legalization of polygamy. (That doesn’t sound like a bad idea when Mike mentions the multi-billion dollar “dad deficit”; why not let women share fathers?) Oh, and wait for his look of disgust about what happens in gay bedrooms. Classic!

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  • DJ

    Someone’s gonna kill him. And I’m waiting… He keeps using the arguement that marriage has been a man in a women throughout history and in the Bible. Two things are wrong with that: 1.) People change and societies change. 2.) Not everyone believes in the bible or God. What ever happened to the separation of church and state? And, “That child is going to be denied of the specific roles that a mother playes?” What?! Are we living in the fucking 50’s? I’m pretty sure if a single mother or father can raise a decent child, then 2 men or 2 women can do it too. His arguments are illegitimate and ignorant.

  • Qjersey

    The thought of Mike Huckabee’s “O” face disgusts me.

  • TheRealAdam

    Humpadick has been saying the same thing for years. Why should anyone be shocked by his anti-gay rhetoric and his “6,000 years of recorded human history” biblical nonsense? This is a non-story.

  • deferr

    @DJ: Your first statement was my first thought. He’s just begging for someone to hurt him.

  • BenFrankly

    What a fool. This is why he will never be President and looks like a jackass. Evengelical nonsense like this has been rejected by the American people time and time again. If he wants to be the anita bryant of the 2012 run for the Presidency I guess he can waste his money but only relgious nutters are going to waste time and money on him. He should have learned this the first time around.

  • GoodboyPA

    Oh he is wrong on so many fronts.

    -‘been the same throughout 6000 years of recorded history’ this is LAUGHABLE to anybody who has spent even FIVE minutes reading Mr. Huckabee’s Good Book. Polygamy? Contract marriage arrangement? Political alignment marriage? Coverture? Wife-as-property? DO THOSE EXIST IN “MODERN MARRIAGE”? Nope? So he lies.

    Look at the history of marriage relative to the Catholic Church. Look at Martin Luther’s view of the condescension within the Catholic Church which says that marriage is a STEP AWAY from God and that the highest service is reserved to those who are SINGLE. Regardless of your view of religious influence on secular government, he belies his prejudice by dealing dishonestly with the SINGLE LARGEST FAITH GROUP in the world.

    Huckabee and his numerous ilk do not DEBATE because all they can do is ASSERT but never PROVE. And his most honest response to the Judge should have been ‘because I said so.’

    -‘children grow best with a natural mother and a natural father’ (sorry, i am not going to replay to get the exact quote). REGARDLESS of whether this assertion is true, several ABSOLUTES leap to mind: (a) he is attacking surrogacy and adoption by ANYBODY, since both result in families without the natural mother and the natural father,

    (b) he is burdening families with SINGLE MOTHERS and families with SINGLE FATHERS without providing ANY solution to deal with this. To assert an ideal without intellectual honesty regarding the current reality is non-sense.

    (c) any RATIONAL person will understand that there will be families that are not the “ideal” regardless, so Mikey proves that it is a political and philosophical AGENDA that drives his comments rather than a concern for the wholeness of the family. There are so many families that are not constituted as in the “ideal” that he either dismisses those families as inconsequential (and poor kids there!) or he is claiming that the government only exists to deal with “ideals”. Again, absolute nonsense.

    (d) once again, Mikey doesn’t deal honestly with the fact that childless marriages are permitted between those who CANNOT conceive (age issues, physical proximity issues such as prison marriages, infertile couples, etc). ONLY intellectual dishonesty can assert that such marriages are valid in Mikey’s construction of “natural law marriage” (which, again, do not correlate with “historical marriage”)

    -last thing worth mentioning: Mikey’s reaction to “what they do in the bedroom” was not simple humor or point of argument, it was an expression of DISGUST and CONTEMPT. Here we find the heart of the matter. Mike Huckabee, and all of those that teach as he does, will ultimately tip their hand that this entire argument boils down to their own emotional reaction (disgust) rather than to the law (natural, constitutional, historical or any other way of looking at the law).

    Every one of these people (Maggie, Peter, James, Mike, Newt, all of them) eventually show contempt for “those disgusting people and the disgusting things they do.” Some are more honest than others.

    But all this does is to prove that heightened scrutiny is ABSOLUTELY the appropriate standard of review for laws which use a classification system that discriminates against GLBT citizens.

  • Kenster999

    I’ll say it again: the argument that children need a mother and a father is an argument against gay *parenting* not gay *marriage*. If that’s their true concern, then they should be campaigning to prevent gay adoptions and surrogacy.

    But if we’re going to let gay people raise kids, wouldn’t it be better if the family had the legal, financial, and social benefits of marriage?

  • FearstheFutureUSA

    I love how he quotes 6,000 years of human history and marriage and also is against polygamy. Polygamy is more traditional than “one man one woman” in most cultures, including Judeo-Christian religious institutions. Not endorsing it just thinking placing all your eggs in the tradition as recorded by history argument may not be the best.

  • John

    @FearstheFutureUSA: Indeed and the Huckster’s argument from natural law avails him nothing when it comes to polygamy, since the number of spouses one has cannot be determined that way. In order to ban polygamy he has to rely upon tradition, Judeo-Christian tradition that only arose a couple centuries before the Common Era and took awhile to become generally accepted. Certainly a “Bible alone” Christian like the Huckster would have a helluva time finding scriptural prohibition against polygamy, with the sole exception being for ancient Israel’s kings in Deuteronomy 17: 17 – though this depends upon how “many” is defined.

  • Harbo

    If you were going to build a bigot from the ground up, you could Huckabee for the model. His thinking is stuck back in the the dark ages. He’s exactly what we DON’T need in the White House. We don’t need a former minister running the country. He’d set off another inquisition. Unfortunately, I’m probably in the minority, but surely to god he can’t be elected. It’s scary.

  • gregger

    Huckabee-the rancid shockwave of a particularly disgusting fart.

  • justiceontherocks

    I REALLY – REALLY don’t want to see anything that goes on in Huckabee’s bedroom.

  • greenmanTN

    The scariest thing about Huckabee is that despite being an evil fuck he usually comes across as nice and sane in interviews in that “I’d like to have a beer with George W Bush” sort of way that American voters love.

    But I don’t have a clue who the hell he thinks he is, trying to tell people the best way to raise children. Google his sons. One of them was caught at Boy Scout camp stabbing and hanging a stray dog to death. No shit. That’s STRAIGHT out of the future serial killer handbook! Yep, Mikey sure knows how to raise ’em right!

  • KalperniaRena

    Okay. So, this guy is going to run for president. He is going to RUN. FOR. PRESIDENT. I think I would take Palin over this guy. At least she is amusing. Huckabee is just scary.

  • McMike

    I am so sick of seeing physically repulsive so-called straight men bitch about other men having sex with each other.

    Could ANYONE please show me a homophobe in the media who is half-way sexually attractive. If you haven’t noticed, every man who spouts out his homophobia in the media is FUGLY.

    There’s a direct link between a guy who knows he couldn’t get laid even if he was gay and the amount of homophobia a man has.

  • Mike_AFX

    It’s sad that disgusting bigots like this cunt actually having a chance at being the president of the United States. He can go fuck himself. If he’s so concerned about the afterlife and being with Jesus he needs to kill himself and go be with Jesus so the rest of us non-loons can enjoy this world.

  • tallest

    for fuck’s sake. WHY! The H is after the goddamn W. it’s not hwy.

    Also shouldn’t Huckabee be off spreading his religiosity to the fuzzywuzzies? Spaghetti monster doesn’t approve of lazitude guv’na.

  • Atomicrob

    Let’s trot out the same old tired arguments against marriage equality and hope no one challenges them! Come on. Marriage has changed radically over time to accommodate societal needs. The religious zealots continue to use the bible as a wedge, as if everyone on the planet agrees with it.

    When will we allow freedom to exist in this country? The bull espoused by these truly mean spirited, divisive politicians is the real problem.

  • Sug Night

    The thought of HIS having sex makes me….well, think of the pea soup scene from THE EXORCIST and multiply it by ten. And he spawned all those Baby Huey “special” kids. Not pretty. Not EVERY person should procreate.

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