The Funniest, Freakiest, Filthiest M4M Ads On Craigslist

A new study released by Dr. Eric Schrimshaw at the University of Columbia’s Mailman School of Public Health found that one in 10 M4M Craigslist ads seek straight men.

Schrimshaw and his gaggle of researchers were flabbergasted, but anyone knows who has ever perused Craigslist’s Casual Encounters — either out of loneliness or for the sheer entrainment value — men seeking anonymous sex with straight men is hardly shocking.

Far filthier things take place on the Internet’s most popular classifieds site each and every day.

We’ve scoured Craigslist for the funniest, freakiest, filthiest M4M ads currently out there. Scroll down to read them (if you dare).

Title: Punishment with Diapers

Ad:  Need some discipline to challenge your head strong and stubborn personality?

I would strap you down and spank you — maybe to tears. Dress you up in a diaper and other baby-esque clothing. Spoon feed you difficult to eat baby food (nothing delicious like banana, more likely an unpopular flavor), and then disciplining you should you refuse.

You’ll wallow in your own waste while I tend to my regular day’s activities, and constantly lecture you on why you’re in this helpless, humiliating situation.

I’m not all punishing, but consistently humiliating…some Rocka-bye-baby cradling and cooing will show you my warmer side! :-)

Can you handle diaper discipline?

Title: Fart in my Face – Sub to Serve

Ad: Total sub, love humiliation, want to serve a top who can blast some farts in my face. Loud and stinky. Will serve however else you like.

Title: Looking for guys into food play or gunge

Ad: Looking for guys that are into have some fun with food. Lots of messy eating, getting food everywhere, licking food off each others cocks and nipples. Also if you’ve heard of gunge then you know what I’m looking for. Prefer stocky to chubby guys because who loves food and sex more then big guys. Good looking chubby and muscular guy here with a big appetite. Please have pics for trade. May not be a today thing, but I’m looking as long as ad is up.

Title: Disney Friends?

Ad: Hi new to the area and looking for some new Disney friends… I have an annual pass and looking to go with someone and have a fun time. About me, I’m 5’8 155 blue eyes brown hair and very attractive. I can’t travel but let me know if you are interested and we can figure something out. I’m waiting…

Love all the rides and food and walking, LOL… It would be fun to have that special person to meet and go on a regular basis :)

Title: Weird Fetish

Ad: I have a fetish for male hands, particularly muscular large hands of guys who don’t bite their nails. Is that too weird? If not, send me a pic of your hand, maybe we can meet and I can serve you.

Title: Looking for a live-in Master on my boat

Ad: I am a 48 trucker looking for a master to live on my boat-0 expense. I am out on road all month except for four days. U get 26 days of privacy and four days of slave service from me. Service includes urinal, fuck hole, cock sucker, service to others etc.

prefer guys that like the ocean/boats, who will be respectful to marina mgt/neighbors as young as u r interested. Send pix for more info.

Title: Leather Bondage & Tickle Torture

Ad: I’m looking to tie you up (hogtie or spread eagle) and watch you squirm as I tickle torture you. I’ll work my way around your body until I find the most sensitive spots.

Regular sane tall athletic guy here with a dominant sadistic streak. I’ll be in my full leather uniform and boots while you’re naked and tied up in my leather cuffs. May apply a blindfold and gag depending on how much noise you make.

Title: I want to watch a guy on the can

Ad: It’s weird…..but I want to watch a guy while they’re on the toilet. Shorts/pants, underwear around your ankles while you’re grunting on the can. Serious inquiries only.

Very good looking, built guy here. Very discreet!

Title: Serious Guidance Provided

Ad: Do you feel very tense? Is being in control stressful? Do you need to talk to someone? Are you going to school and your grades are not what they should be? As a boy did your Father make you bare your bottom and spank it red? This had to help. A red backside gives you a reminder to excell in your tasks. Im looking for men who know and have felt the sting and burn of a red backside. The embarasment of removing your boxers and being spanked. If you would like this again please let me know. I can host.

Title: Dirty confession, also need advice

Ad: I have a very, very naughty confession I need to tell someone about. I just did it today when I was alone.

Only respond if you are completely nonjudgmental and really dirty anal play doesn’t gross you out.

If you are 18-40 and have email through google that would be best.

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  • Desert Boy

    The always entertaining Howard Stern had a segment a few years ago about women who love to smell hot guy’s farts. He had one guy come in, eat a bowl of sauerkraut and then let ’em rip in the face of women who were aroused by such behavior.

    Fetish is bizarre.

  • Ben Dover

    I don’t believe it. Somebody spelled/used “discreet” correctly on Craigslist?

  • Billy Budd

    People’s desires are SO diversified. Bizarre!

  • sonofabee

    These are pretty typical examples of the freaky-deaky stuff I’ve seen on my local craigslist. The spanking one seems to come up quite frequently. The diaper one comes up once or twice a month. Bondage stuff is on there all the time and is almost mainstream. It’s not just limited to the “casual encounters” section either. I see this sort of thing all the time in the dating/relationship section (which a lot of guys use for one-time hookups… I guess reading comprehension isn’t a strong suit for most of them).

    Also, can we talk about the guys who have been posting the same ad on a daily basis for literally YEARS, using the same photo, and their age never changes (or it goes DOWN rather than up)? Please tell me that’s not just something that happens in my area…

    Or the guys who claim to be “visiting from out of town” and “only here for a short while” but they’ve been posting the same ad for months or years…

    Or the guys who claim to be “100% total bottom” but they only post pictures of their dicks…

    Or the guys who post in the dating/relationship section and say things like “looking for a relationship ONLY, I am NOT looking for hookups or casual sex!” but then at the same time they post hookup ads in the casual encounters section. Multiple personality disorder?

    Or the guys who claim they’re “totally inexperienced, never done anything like this before!” but they’ve been posting the same ad and the same pic for years…

    craigslist is nothing if not entertaining!

  • boring

    Uhh Yeah Dude covered this already. In 2006.

  • Ben Dover

    @sonofabee: “I guess reading comprehension isn’t a strong suit for most of them” – Yeah, check out the “Platonic” section which is usually sex ads too!

  • sonofabee

    @Ben Dover: I’ve noticed that. :) It seems to be a mix of guys trying to find someone who’ll give them free weed, and guys looking for sex. One time I posted an ad in that section, looking to meet someone who is interested in the hobby of aircraft/aviation, but the responses were sexual in nature. People are strange.

  • Brian

    Aw, the Disney one is nice. If I were local, I would have responded. Amusement parks (and rides) are better in pairs. Sometimes I wish there were more gay men posting ads about starting things off platonically / casually. It’s possible to wait til the second date for sex, you know….

  • Stache99

    @Brian: I was liking that too until he says he’s got an annual pass and wants to meet up at Disneyland on a regular basis. Once is nice. More then that you’ve got a serious problem.

  • Stache99

    They forgot the K9 fetish crowd. Sometimes they even have k9 parties. I guess as long as the dogs are enjoying themselves too;)

  • QuintoLover

    @Stache99: Pssh, speak for yourself. Some people still enjoy the magic.

  • BritAus

    Weird thing is, that most of these guys are probably really HOT.

Comments are closed.