Thomas Roberts Hits The Town

Thomas Roberts may be out at CNN, but he’s certainly in the DC gay scene. Well, that’s what one of our drunken readers says in an inebriated email.

Apparently the homo-journo, who made headlines with his candid priest molestation-related interview with Anderson Cooper, has been living it up down on the Beltway. And getting into some go-go boys’ belts, according to our soused source. We’ve included the his entire email after the jump. We’d edit it, but it’s too rich to fuck with.

Had a cocktail (or seven) at Halo on Wednesday and noticed a new face out and about. Tonight, had some more cocktails (or eight) at Cobalt and saw the same new face. But it wasn’t a new face. It’s a face homo DC news junkies have been touching themselves to for years. ‘Twas none other than (former) CNNs Thomas Roberts. He was moving around the room from (DC B-celebrity) star-struck homo to star-struck homo…enjoying the heaps of attention celebrity starved Washingtonians so love. It was akin to a passed around crack pipe in the alleys near the ashes of the Southest club formerly known as Secrets…which is quite apropos as the last homo he settled on is a bartender that was a former stripper at Secrets. It was quite charming to see Mr. Roberts reach over the bar and grab said stripper’s belt loops and draw him into his “manspace” as the stripper shrieked (subsequently dropping a fabulous Marc Jacobs clutch purse out of his mouth that I promptly swooped up to sell on Ebay).

All the while, my friend is commenting on something he read awhile back: Roberts had been approached in 2005 by People magazine to be one of the publication’s 50 Sexiest Bachelors, but he declined. “I’m not a bachelor. I thought it would be false advertising… [And] I didn’t think it was the right venue to talk about it.”

Oh well. Snooze you loose. Did I mention that an inch of on-camera make up works for drag queens AND former newscasters a like? Just staying [sic].

I know all this because I’m a drunk and visit Cobalt too often. I tried to take a photograph, but it was dark, and my crappy camera phone sux. So I came home and put together a photo illustration (above) to show exactly what it looked it. And really, it was EXACTLY like this.

Happy Gay Pride.

I’m so drunk.

Bless anyone who signs a letter “I’m so drunk”!!

So, DC dick lovers, any other sightings of the hunky Roberts trolling around town? As for the reader-provided collage – it looks like the CNN kids really know how to party.