This weekend, the Philadelphia Eagles and the Kansas City Chiefs will go head-to-head in
the Rihanna concert pre/post-show Super Bowl LVII.
But before that—in a post-season match-up no one saw coming—a famous footballer and a gay pop star are (unofficially) competing to see whose brand-sponsored thirst traps can get more attention.
Let’s call it… The Battle Of The Bulge.
For starters, fresh off the box office success of 80 For Brady, Super Bowl champion Tom Brady has stripped down to his underwear on social media, causing quite a stir.
After a final season with the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and allegedly retiring from the NFL for good, Brady is now free to dedicate time to the things that really matter… like promoting his Brady brand underwear.
On his Instagram story, the quarterback posted a mirror pic in nothing more than his briefs. Depending on who you ask, his hand is either tastefully covering his bulge—or just pretty suggestively grabbing his crotch.
Apparently Brady’s holding up his end of a bargain after promising he would “recreate” Brady brand photos if his tweet got over 40k likes. Not to nitpick, Tom, but that’s not necessarily a recreation.
Regardless, the photo made its way to Twitter, where many gays have noted that Brady’s undies shot looks an awful lot like every other thirst trap in their feeds:
Others have called attention to the fact that the recent divorcée’s photo—Brady split with supermodel Gisele Bündchen last fall after 13 years together—is pretty standard “new bachelor” fare:
As far as underwear ads go, it’s clearly working; we had no idea Brady had his own line of briefs until he decided to take his pants off and show us himself.
But Brady’s up against one of the titans of the underwear league, Calvin Klein, which has recruited musician Troye Sivan for its new World Pride campaign.
Ahead of the global LGBTQ+ celebration—which kicks off in Sydney later this month—the Australian pop star has unveiled new treasure trail-baring photos that show off some of the brand’s colorful briefs.
Steamiest of all is a video that Calvin Klein posted with the caption, “Does this count as a tease?,” showing off Sivan adjusting his waistline, giving that midriff some fresh air, and just generally looking great in some Calvins.
Yes, this very much counts as a tease!
The “Bloom” singer’s stans and admirers have come out in full force on social media, sharing their *ahem* appreciation for the Pride campaign:
With Brady and Sivan’s photos competing for attention, it’s been quite a thirsty morning on the the gay internet. Although, of course, we’d have to give to give the win to Sivan, since he’s actually playing for our team, if you know what we mean.
But where do you stand? Who’s your MVP: Most Valuable Peni—um… Most Valuable Poster?
We’re not taking it to an official vote, but here’s a place you can make your voice heard: Troye Sivan is one of this year’s Queerties nominees for Film Performance thanks to his work in the gay coming-of-age indie, Three Months. You can vote for him below, and support all of your faves here, now through February 21.
This has really nothing to do with this article, other than that Tom Brady looks great in his underwear, but yesterday I saw 80 For Brady and really liked it if just for the 4 main actresses and their interaction. Can’t believe Rita Moreno is 91! Got a question for anybody who can answer it: After they get to the Super Bowl there is a scene with Sally Field is sitting on a bench talking to/resting her head on, etc a cute, younger guy with a little beard growth wearing a powder blue polo shirt and dark blue slacks. They have a conversation. He has dialogue. He seemed really familiar from something else but as far as I can tell he is not credited at the end of the movie or on IMDB, which is really odd! Anybody out there see the movie and recognize him? Thanks!
I would like to know also! In addition, I noticed in the credits that Gus Kentworthy was in film. Did you see him or know when/who/where?…
Tom has a small penis. have you seen those pics. the grower not a shower definitely doesn’t work to his advantage either. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
Great you saw the movie. Question: is Tom actually in the movie engaging with the 4 actresses? Or is it just old clips of him playing Football? How much of Tom do you actually see acting if at all?
None of the trailers focus on him.
both are yuck
Gus Kenworthy was in a really quick pan shot at a party talking to Brian Jordan Alvarez who played Jack’s husband Estéfan on Will & Grace and was in the 3rd episode of the first seaon of Special on Netflix.
Troye Sivan? Really? He only stands knee high to Marky Mark of CK billboard fame. Skinny runt comes to mind.
Go into any twinkie gay bar in LA and you’ll see a hundred Troye Sivans. They’re all short and skinny and have a bored/sullen facial expression. Even twink-era Justin Bieber had more vitality than this poser.
No Tom, You didnt do it right. Your hand is blocking the reason for the picture.
I am attracted to confidence and self worth!
would appear to be a substantial amount of packaging in Troye’s undies. Never seen any evidence that he’s packing anything other than something attuned to his body size.
Neither of them do it for me.
More for me! Spit roast, please.
There’s not even the hint of a bulge in any of these pix.
Not really a “battle”. Tom’s got 20 years on the kid and he’s shown plenty vpl in uniform over the years just like many other football players
I have been a fan, but Brady’s fifteen year old son must be mortified that his father is posting pics like that. Brady doesn’t have all the money already?
Seriously, Queerty? BATTLE OF THE BULGES?! This is a giant nothingburger. I realize its Monday and y’all have to fill your columns, and your interns scour the interwebs for tidbits. But SERIOUSLY WHY IS THIS EVEN COVERED? It’s a waste of my time, and increasingly Queerty is becoming recycled social media clickbait. #DoBetter
Y’all sure like to make a whole lot of nothing out of something the article was about his underwear which he ain’t showing much of it. Can’t believe this was the best picture out the bunch taken. Is this how it’s going to be he’s going to be in the news for every thing he does ???
Brady’s hiding what little he’s got and the twink, meh. Instead, focus on the two starting QBs in Sunday’s Super Bowl!
Tom Brady is the ultimate narcissist and was jealous to see his ex modeling sexy lingerie in Miami so he had to copy her. He needs attention. Period.
Sweetie, his “ex” was already a supermodel years before they got married.
That pic of Tom is so poor all around I didn’t know it was him at first glance.
Troye Sivan is not remotely sexy, in or out of underwear. Yuck.
You read it here first…Brady is going to become a really tall WOMAN. He’s already started making his face more feminine. Out of the way Jenner, there’s a new girl in towm