The new POZ Magazine feature article, “Finding Larry Kramer,” tells the behind-the-scenes story of how the iconic activist found his way back to GMHC nearly thirty years after the organization kicked him out for being such a pain in the ass. It is an intimate look at an American hero and lion in winter.
I had the pleasure of writing the story, which meant meeting both Larry and Kelsey Louie, the GMHC head who orchestrated the reunion, but space did not permit me to share what might be the most surprising thing of all about the man people often associate with righteous anger: his love affair with a man he pursued for decades.
In the article, I have this to say about the softer side of Larry:
All his writing, including his screenplays, his controversial novel, Faggots, and even The Normal Heart, is at its core about the pursuit and potency of love. The poignant secret hiding in plain sight is that Larry Kramer is a romantic.
But there’s so much more to the story.
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
In the 1970’s, Larry wrote his outrageous novel, Faggots, a searing indictment of the relentless sexual pursuits of gay men, as a way of coming to terms with losing the man of his dreams in real life. That man, named Dinky in the book, is portrayed as a hot number with an overbooked dance card, hardly able to step away from the sling long enough to pay much attention to the main character, Fred — based on Larry, of course. The book does not end with the two of them walking into the sunset together. There are far too many sweets in the gay candy store for Dinky to focus on one alone.
Say what you will about Faggots – and plenty of people have, holding up the pitch-black sexual satire as evidence of Larry’s moralistic stance toward gay men that the coming onslaught of AIDS would only cement – but the writing about Dinky is affectionate, hilarious, brutal, and, at times, terribly sexy. Late in the book, as Fred makes his final plea to Dinky for a relationship, Dinky is described sliding his taut body into his skin-tight leather gear with so much erotic panache that your fingers hold the book tighter, you breathe heavier. It’s enough to make you bemoan the advent of video porn.
At any rate, Dinky is a real person and his name is David Webster. And two decades after their star-crossed (St. Andrews crossed?) initial affair, Larry and David circled back to one another, fell in love and were married in 2013. Talk about a long tease.
David was nearby during my interview with Larry in their New York City apartment, finally settling in with us on the sofa as the afternoon progressed. He is a strikingly handsome man, witty and charming and flirtatious, if my radar for such things is still functional. He also dotes on Larry – a completely mutual trait – and offered occasional context or even defense of Larry’s views.
The topic of Faggots eventually came up, of course (I had my first edition copy in my knapsack, waiting for the right moment for an autograph), and I couldn’t help but ask David how it felt to have the kinkiest details of his sex life in the center of the heralded, vilified novel. I had heard that David once considered the book a total invasion of his life.
“So, David,” I asked, a bit sheepishly, “is it true what Larry says in Faggots? Did he actually—“
“Ransack my leather gear collection while I was out of my apartment?” he interrupted. “Go through my file cabinets? Punch me in the face?” David blurted this all out incredulously, but his grin was mischievous. “The man is crazy!”
Larry smiled broadly at David’s feigned injury, as if hearing a favorite family story for the umpteenth time. “Faggots was my love letter to David,” Larry tells me, still beaming at his husband.
“He’s crazy!” David repeated.
I knew the scene was being played for my benefit but it was adorable nevertheless. Their affection for one another was palpable, whether in spite of, or because of, their complicated romantic history.
The time felt right for me to produce my copy of the novel and ask for a signature. Larry took the book graciously and then asked, “What did you think of it?”
“I read it when it came out in 1978, when I was 17 years old,” I told him. “I was horrified.”
I was a baby gay who was shocked by the phantasmagoric sex in Faggots and the seeming impossibility of committed love. “I remember wondering, Is this me, is this what I am going to be? And then,” I admitted to Larry, “within a few years, that book was me…”
Larry nodded knowingly. “But I read it again before meeting you today,” I added, “and the writing is hilarious. I couldn’t see that the first time.” I also could never have known I would be standing in the living room of the two main characters, together at last.
Larry dutifully inscribed my copy and considered the gauntlet his character walked through in order to capture the man he loved.
“This whole book,” Larry said, “was my way of saying to David, ‘This is how much I love you.’”
And this time, David smiled back.
(Check out the full story, “Finding Larry Kramer,” at POZ.com.)
ProfessorMoriarty
I am a terrible homo. I had no idea that Larry’s husband was Dinky. What a lovely story.
Tobi
I re-read it only recently and I’m afraid that I found it as tedious and boring as I did the first time around, I much preferred Holleran’s Dancer From The Dance.
ChrisK
I’ve not read it so I can’t say but he does come off judgmental of the very subject so I don’t know how interesting it could be.
Wilberforce
Tedious and boring? Surely ye jest. With all the interesting characters and crazy plot twists? Please.
Of course it was a re-write of Dancer from the Dance, which was slightly better. But Kramer did a fab job, and very true to life. I had the same experience that he and the doctor had, when the room of gay men went ballistic when they suggested cooling it sexually until we knew what was happening. That happened to me at gay meetings at UC Berkley and Stanford.
Maybe, like most mainstream queers, you didn’t like it for calling out gay men’s internalized homophobia and self-destructiveness. It’s the usual line, pretending to object to something else.
Wilberforce
Actually, I take it back. Kramer’s book was better than Dancer. It was more entertaining and addressed serious issues, which is why the shallow crowd hates it.
Tobi
@Wilberforce.
Interesting characters?!
I found the endless cast, whose names all end in a “y” (or sound like they do) Antony, Timothy, Winnie, Paulie, Dinky, Randy, Mikie, Sammy, Richie, Gatsby, et al entirely flat, totally two dimensional, completely interchangeable, and having just read it, about the only thing I can recall about any of them is Timmy was supposed to be the pretty one.
As for the plot twists, there’s no plot, just a series of different observations involving a new cast of characters, all irrelevantly strung together, but padded with extensive and often meaningless lists, sometimes page after page of them.
Kramer certainly can’t hold a candle to Holleran’s lyrical and often beautifully haunting prose.
I also think you’re reaching (and missing badly) in calling those who aren’t impressed by Kramer’s cross between a diary and some lecture notes a “shallow crowd”. In my book if someone likes Dancer, they can hardly be accused of not appreciating a treatise on shallowness alongside a tour-de-force on the myriad acts of self-destruction!
You should hop over to Amazon. I found that Dancer has no 1-star reviews, yet Kramer’s turgid offering is awash with them, many of them echoing my own thoughts, so you might want to have a re-read of both and reconsider.
After all just because it’s “gay” doesn’t make it good, but if it floats your boat, then that’s fine, in the end it’s all a matter of taste, or lack of it.
ErikO
Kramer’s book sucks and it’s extremely dated, and Kramer is a total hypocrite. But Kramer is batsh!t crazy, and believes he helped people when he’s done nothing but attempt to sabotage groups like ACTUP and GMHC when they became large and were attempting to help people. But I’m not surprised that Mark S. King the author that promotes bareback sex and believes that being HIV+ is having a “fabulous disease” loves Kramer.
ChrisK
You really can’t have it both ways. Like Wilberforce said Kramer was a stick in the mud when it came to the free love and HIV. He wanted people to become more monogamous. Why would Mark who you say promotes bareback sluttiness be promoting him?
You are a loon. At least keep it consistent.
fraziercole
As a precocious youngster, I read this novel at 14…..safely hidden from my parents. It deeply moved and, frankly, scared the shit out of me…and it taught me what felching was….I felt like the most worldly 14 year old in my high school for months…..
DistingueTraces
Well!
Very pleased to see a more substantial article appearing here.