Dear Jesse,
I’m glad to see that a FB post can stoke a fire that burns in the LGBT community, and supporters of our community.
Many doors have opened in gay people’s fight for equality. Civil rights, marriage rights, and depictions of us individually and collectively on television. Great strides have taken us from tolerance into acceptance and towards true equality.
Stereotypes still exist. They probably always will. And while the truth is usually somewhere in the middle, stereotypes polarize us. No news there. But while an explanation of a stereotype can make good, logical sense, it still leaves the stereotype intact.
I’m glad to have played gay characters, but at the same time have been frustrated by the stereotypes I feel I’ve been party to in playing those roles. I’ve begged wardrobe designers so I wouldn’t have to wear paisley shirts, directors to reconsider a “snap” at the end of a scene, and writers to remove ‘Hey, gurl!’ from dialogue.
I did it because when I was growing up, trying to figure out where I fit it in, I couldn’t seem to locate a role model. The stereotypes I saw made me think, ‘Well, I don’t identify with that so I must not be gay.’
I can appreciate that one man’s roadblock may be another man’s role model. I feel like my growth was stunted, but understand that another person’s may have been bolstered. I believe that, as a community we want to make the path easier for those who come after us. I want that. I’m certain you do to.
Some audience members can laugh through a character, but it can also distance others. We each come to the fight with our own baggage…as well as our own weaponry. ‘Revolutionary times call for revolutionary means.’ My comments were extreme, and my use of the word ‘blackface’ inexcusable. I regret creating dissension among the ranks, especially when we’re all in this fight together.
I see your point. I hope you’ll consider mine.
Sincerely,
Tuc”
— Tuc Watkins explaining on Facebook his complaint that the gay characters on Modern Family are comparable to “blackface” after the show’s star Jesse Tyler Ferguson posted his own defense of the series.
Sammy Schlipshit
Don’t apologize.
Don’t back down.
You obviously hit a nerve which is often connected to a truism.
david624
I feel exactly the same way-Sara Jessica Tyler Fergeson is an embarrassment to any self respecting gay male. it’s not a part he’s the same nelly faggot on awards shows,talk shows and anywhere else I have seen him. I am a proud gay man and extremes in all behaviors bother me-not every one is the same-but good God girl butch it up a little
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
Yeah, the stereotypes exists and probably always have. But many other types exist and have always existed — and entertainment industry and society in general has known this all along deep down but either consciously or unconsciously chose to distort reality. And continues to so. it’s changing but not fast enough.
If these guys in some way represent you or your aspirations, I’m glad for you and good luck. But these motherfuckers mean shit to me and speak zero to my life. These guys have a place BUT we need a continual push for more and border representation.
Dude, thank you for opening up the dialogue.
PRINCE OF SNARKNESS aka DIVKID
*broader
Scribe38
@david624: Why would you want anyone to present other than who they are? Feminine gay men aren’t the enemy. You should find a better use of your time than shading an out gay man putting a positive face on homosexuals.
On a personal note: I would bang the hell out of that red head 😉
jason smeds
Don’t apologize, Tuc. Modern Family uses ridiculous ministrel-like portrayals of gay men to make straights laugh.
CalderBear
Tuc seriously thinks that he might not be gay because he couldn’t identify with a role model? That strikes me as odd. It’s also odd that he berates about playing stereotypes with the acknowledgement he has done so too. Our community is a broad church, and you cannot expect it to be represented in a solitary entertainment show.
Merv
I never watch the show, so I have no opinion on whether his comment was true, but I don’t see why we have to apologize for our opinions. People need to accept that we’re not all going to agree on everything, and stop trying to pressure people into apologizing.
Milk
Sit-com can be tricky. There’s a fine line between playing a caricature and a stereotype gay caricature. Mitch and Cam characters seems to touch on what Tuc Watkins was stating. In fact his character Bob Hunter and Kevin Rahm’s Lee McDermott in Desperate Housewives were not that different from each other. His criticism should aim at the producers and the viewers. America in general still is not there to accept a regular gay characters. Cam and Mitchell over the top clownish acting is a way of sugar coating the gays. It meant as a jest not to be taken seriously. The last show I can remember which treat the gay characters with respect on a major network (not cable channels) were Scott and Kevin Walker from Brothers and Sisters. This debate is not about the two actors calling each other out. Rather on the acceptance of realistic gay characters on network television.
Aromaeus
Seems like Tuc has some serious internalized homophobia to work through. Also I’m really tired of whites trying to compare things to the black struggle. It’s just in poor taste considering you all benefit from racism and white supremacy.
skcord
Yeah… one can argue that the gay characters on modern family were formulated and performed with good intentions. That can never be said of blackface which was originated and perpetuated with the sole purpose of degrading and stigmatizing an entire group of people. It isn’t the same and it’s ridiculous and offensive to gays and blacks, hyperbolic or not, to suggest otherwise. The lack of awareness among certain privileged segments of our community is mind-boggling. I won’t even delve into the subject his own internalized homophobia…. this guy clearly has stuff he needs to work out in himself.
jvcarroll
Forget this guy and his non-apology. All types of people should be represented in media, not just the pre-approved, pasteurized personalities that seem to please a more conservative palate. If he wants more of his “type of gay” man, then he should work harder to be a more sought after actor. The problem is not these colorful individuals – it’s bigotry and that sadly occurs among some LGBT people too. And isn’t being a gay soap opera actor the ultimate stereotype? The best role model anyone could have is that of a person comfortable in their own skin. Period.
QNetter
I’m pretty bored with guys who think they can’t identify with stereotypical gay men, but can identify with the stereotypical jock-head straight men they were programmed to be.
Daniel-Reader
Cam and Mitch are written as an abusive couple that eventually ends with Mitchell cowering in a domestic abuse shelter muttering “keep the gacy clown away, keep the gacy clown away”, or ends with a murder-suicide while the straight couples on the show are in domestic bliss. Some episodes are just disturbing depictions of a couple that hates each other. I guess the straight audience can relate to that. It’s creepy.
QNetter
@Daniel-Reader: Then I guess you’ve never been in a happy marriage, but only read Harlequin Romances.
Kieran
The continual reinforcement of the nelly gay stereotype by the entertainment media has probably been the most effective means used by society to keep gay men ashamed, embarassed and closeted.
Tuc Watkins is absolutely right and comparing it with “blackface” is an entirely apt. Both are devious methods the entertainment industry used to invoke belittling and demeaning laughter at a particular group of people with the objective of encouraging society’s scorn toward them. We’ve had more than enough of the effeminate gay stereotypes. We need to see a more balanced portrayal of gay men going forward.
QNetter
@Kieran: The insistence of denying the nelly gay stereotype, instead of accepting that we don’t have to model het behavior the way we are programmed from childhood in order to be “worthy” of rights, is what truly holds us back.
Daniel-Reader
It’s more like too many weak-willed human beings using marriage as an excuse to tolerate domestic abuse or to perpetrate it.
JimboinLA
My problem with Tyler Fergeson is that he’s just not a very good actor. You can tell he not at all sexually attracted to Stonestreet and it’s almost like he is offended at having to play a chubby chaser but does it for the cash. His non existent sexual chemistry with Stonestreet is the reason that relationship doesn’t work at all. Him and Manny are the big problems with that cast for me.
QNetter
@JimboinLA: The sexual chemistry is non-existent because they’re written to be safely asexual with each other.
Michael
@jvcarroll: He did apologize for using the word blackface. As to the rest, there’s nothing to apologize for. You said it yourself: “All types of people should be represented in the media.” And yet oddly Hollywood overwhelmingly does not do so. What we almost always get is either asexual monks (e.g.: non-threatening to straights) like Will or cookie-cutter finger-snapping bitchy-queen gay males like Cam and Mitchell. Where’s the representation for anyone else?
And your comment about the solution being for Watkins to be a more sought after actor is beyond silly. The topic was the characters being represented, not the actors. Actors rarely play themselves. The solution is for Hollywood to write characters that more accurately represent the whole gay community, but they have little incentive to do that since, today at least, flamboyance yields ratings.
QNetter
@Michael: And for realism, Ty Burrell should play a less naive guy. And Ed O’Neil a calmer one. And Sofia Vergara should have lost most of that accent by now.
Paco
So in a nutshell, Tuc Watkins has internalized issues because Jesse Tyler Ferguson plays a type of gay man on television that he finds unacceptable and can’t personally relate to (even though that type of gay man commonly exists in real life).
My advice to Mr. Watkins…
Become the role model you were deprived of growing up, rather than tearing down the types of gay men you, personally, find unacceptable to be portrayed on television.
cflekken
This is a non-issue. Move on.
iBLOW
I get what he’s saying because although there are gay men that act like Cam and Mitch it makes no sense that the characters are like that in 2014 where so many shows exist with non stereotypical gay characters.The characters also enforce the fact that straight people don’t care about you being gay as long as you never talk about your sex life.
scott609
There is no reason for Tuc to back down on this. I know so many people who came out in past decades and thought the only way to be gay was to act like the stereotype, because that was all they ever saw. Now it is happening again. The most common portrayal of a gay man on tv seems to have to fit that old stereotype too. I just wish they would start reflecting the diversity of gayness, instead of just doing this one trick pony over and over.
I know it represents a number of gays, but gay kids today need to see that they can be whoever or whatever they want to be. I blame the media for only going with the stereotypes instead of more nuanced characters.
JimmyJ
Love you, Tuc. You didn’t have to apologize for anything! I’m so grossed out by them I never even watch that show. You shouldn’t have apologised. All they do is make fun of gay couples, all they are is fat, ginger and everything undesirable. Yuck! Their camp selves, the voices, the exaggerated hand gestures and movements. So fucking gross!
onthemark
I never understood this “role model” stuff. Over-concern about that is a sign of a very insecure personality.
Chris
I get objecting to the stereotyping of gay characters on TV. Sometimes, it is too much for me and I follow the advice given by one rather nelly gay young-man in another posting: “If you don’t like it, there’s the X (to turn the screen off).”
I even get people’s objecting to others who go over the top, be it deep-voiced macho or over-fem. People who doth protest too much are simply too much to bear. I prefer people to be genuine so that if being over-the-top fem is who you genuinely are, then so be it. I can drink to that. But the fakery, that I cannot take.
But what bothered me about this whole exchange is/was Tuc’s use of the term “black face.” That term conjures up an entire history of slavery, minstrel shows, and simple outright racism. It was white folk (not black folk) who put on black face in these acts. Until race relations in this country improve, I am simply not comfortable with its use.
I know that the 1900s history of gay folk is violent, hateful and shameful. Being the old fart that I am, I remember how Milton Berle depicted transvestites and how others depicted gay folk in movies like Boys in the Band. I can see why many of us would want to use a strong term like “black faced.” However, those are extremely racialized, hateful and hurting terms that have a long history in this society. I would hope that we can find other ways of expressing ourselves without resorting to terminology that was not authentically in our past.
JPDonahue
@david624: Oh, david624,Just saying “Sara Jessica Tyler Fergeson” kinda puts you into that, what did you say? Oh yeah, “nelly faggot” category. Self-loathe much?
Tuc’s original comments make me wonder how often he described himself as “Straight Acting.”
Michael
@Paco: Show me where Tuc Watkins said anything of the sort. Show me where he said he finds Cam or Mitchell’s characters to be “unacceptable.” What he said was unacceptable was the media’s persistent overuse of the cliched bitchy gay male stereotype and how it fails to represent or resonate with him. And he is clearly not alone in that complaint.
Until you can read for content perhaps you should refrain from giving unsolicited advise.
Alan down in Florida
@jason smeds: No jason. It’s a question of shorthand for the viewers. The shows need to use nelly behavior to make certain that viewers tuning in for the first time don’t have to be brought up to date on backstory. They need to know immediately who the gay characters are. This is particularly important in 30 minute sitcoms because of time restrictions.
dhmonarch89
it really sucks that people can’t have opinions today- we have to apologize for everything…all he should have said was- hey, it’s just how I feel…
Paco
@Michael: Accusing the characters Cam and Mitchell of being the gay equivalent of blackface (which was very hyperbolic and unnecessarily offensive), is saying they are unacceptable portrayals of gay men. So go choke on your own advice sweetheart. Until you can read for content, perhaps you should refrain from responding to comments your tiny brain just can’t understand.
Happy Holidays!
tricky ricky
David Vickers doesn’t need to apologize for anything!
jason smeds
I’m not afraid to have an opinion. Modern Family promotes anti-gay stereotypes that are designed to make homophobic people laugh at us. There, I said it.
nature boy
I hated Modern Family until I actually watched it, due to my lesbian friend telling me to give it a chance because she liked it. When I actually watched a few episodes back to back when had a marathon, I did like it. It reminds me of Seinfeld in that all of the characters are selfish exaggerated stereotypes but then there are a few moments of real sincerity and humanity that do touch you. Yes the gay characters are stereotypes but they’re not depicted any worse than the straight characters are also depicted. It really is more about today’s dysfunctional upper middle class American family than straight vs gay. Overall I’m happy that gay couple is portrayed on TV, at least they are showing kids that gay men can be part of, and have their own, families.
muscl954
Paisley shirts are “gay”? Who knew??
woodin
He’s not the first nor will he be the last to characterize gay actors or gay characters as the equivalent of contemporary black face.
jar
Many of the comments here make me laugh. The moaning from those who claim that swishy gay stereotypes are bad because they lead young gay boys to think that they had to be swishy if they were gay is hilarious. I grew up watching Paul Lynde, Rip Taylor, Charles Nelson Reilly, etc. and never thought I’d have to wear an ascot because I’m gay, let alone ape their behaviors in order to be authentic. If you sincerely believed you had to be swishy to be gay, you had developmental problems that go far beyond TV and film depictions.
Underlying this kind of debate is the unstated desire by people like this Tucker guy to pass, to not be readily identifiable as gay. This anxiety that some carry is as old as our struggle. The solution is to look inward, to find your own self-acceptance. Raging at others who do accept themselves merely perpetuates your own discomfort with yourself. Sure, you think the solution lies with others projecting an image that doesn’t cause you anxiety, but I assure you that image does not exist outside yourself.
Tony G
@david624: Why should he have to butch it up? How would you like it if someone told you to “femme up a bit honey”?
iluvcakes
I find it so hilarious and typical some of these comments. I truly understand how it feels and what he is saying. They are promoting some stereotypes, however its important to note that there are some gay characters in TV and film that do not.
It’s ridiculous to say he is “Homophobic” as he clearly is not, I think he is more “Homofem Phobic”. That being said, I also do not feel comfortable with some guy referring to me as a “Gurl”, “Miss thang”, “Queen”.etc
If I were to say that to a man using those terms to me his response will most likely be “Queen Please!” or to make it seem as if I am not accepting something or lacking within myself.
I don’t mind listening to Beyonce every now and then but I do not deify her and I don’t even have any of her music on my player. (Queue the Gasp)
I think in that way we feel disconnected from the rest of the community. Not every Masc gay man is putting up some front or pretending.
So I understand fully what he is speaking on. Apparently not many do..
vive
@iluvcakes, yes, I find fem-phobic to be an accurate description of Tuc Watkins’s initial comments and of his “apology,” which just digs him in deeper.
Fem-phobia is a huge problem within the gay community itself, as proved by many of these comments. It is an ugly kind of bigotry that is considered completely okay among many circles of gay men who want to be considered “straight-acting.” It is not okay.