Ultimate Fighters = Gay

If only this piece of satire were true:

No holds barred cage fighting can lead to long term gayness and an obsession with thighs, the British Medical Association claimed last night. The BMA is warning that men who are attracted to cage fighting are already gay or at least entertaining the possibility of a gay-based lifestyle.

According to a BMA study around 82% of men who took part in the vicious fights were gay before they started and another 12% became gay during their first fight.

That explains BJ Penn and Jens Pulver’s loving embrace.

For those of you mathemagicians wonder what happened to the final 6%: “[They got into] cage fighting because they wanted to beat up gay men.”