STATUS UPDATE

Vice Magazine Ranks The 10 Hottest Homophopbes On Facebook

We remember reading Vice magazine in high school and laughing our asses off over the Do’s and Don’ts. We were kinda perpetually high back then, so we thought maybe the mag wasn’t as funny as we remembered. But we recently came across a feature by writer Jamie Lee Curtis Taete (we’re gonna assume that’s a nom du plume) that confirms Vice as a source of outrageously un-p.c. guffaws.Taete pored through what we can only imagine were dozens of Facebook statuses to find choice examples of knee-jerk lowbrow homophobia from white trash, wiggers, ghetto boys and other assorted losers—and then wryly commented on them.

Take, for example, Clay:

JLCT retorts thusly to this fashion-plate farm boy: “Oh Clay, let’s just say I wish that I was that goat, and you weren’t wearing those jeans. If you can wrap your head around that innuendo.”

We get the impression Jamie is using the word “hot” sarcastically. Or perhaps s/he’s saying they’re actually overheated—an odd number of them appear to be shirtless.

Like Ron:

JLCT’s reply? “I’m not 100 percent sure what you’re talking about here, Ron, but boy would I love to fuck that facepaint right off of your head.”

Again, we hope s/he’s being sarcastic.

Click here for the full rundown of FB homo haters.