WATCH: 11-Year-Old Gayby Meets His Drag Race Hero on The Rosie Show

When we heard Rosie O’Donnell was getting a talk show on OWN, we weren’t sure which Ro we were gonna get: Sweet, Broadway-loving Rosie from The Rosie O’Donnell Show or angry, or angry, awkward Rosie from The View and Twitter.

Judging from this clip, she’s a real teddy bear: Rosie unites 11-year-old aspiring fashion designer Ben with his  idol, RuPaul.

Don’t fuck it up, kid!


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  • Brian

    Looking at this kid as the next generation of gay, I know it can’t be a phase. It’s more a dynasty of sorts.

  • MEJ

    I know it shouldn’t, but for some reason this clip makes me uncomfortable. I have no doubt whatsoever the boy is gay; but would he be this gay, if he wasn’t exposed to stereotypes of what gay men are suppose to be?

    I knew lots of femme boys in the various schools I went to over the years, but they were just like every other boy, except they were effeminate. Today’s young effeminate boys appear to be taking on a caricature of the stereotypes they’re exposed to.

    Maybe it’s just my internalized homophobia, or the fact that kids today are being encouraged to act like adults at younger ages, but anytime I see a young femme boy “acting” like a stereotypical effeminate adult, I feel uncomfortable.

  • Spike

    Typical Queerty, had anyone actually watched the segment before writing this post, not once did Rosie, his Mother nor RuPaul infer that the boy was gay nor did the kid say he was gay. . The kid is into costume and fashion design and has been bullied in school being called gay, etc.

    Leave it to Queerty to bully the kid online referring to him as a gayby.

    Shame on you!

  • tookietookie

    We’ll never live in some ideal world where adults don’t project their issues onto children. It’s okay for kids to try on different behaviors as long as they’re not hurting anybody. So what if he is being overly expressive or however you’re conceiving of this, and he decides to rein it in later? Those boys you knew in school had no freedom to try on these mannerisms, which is the real issue. Don’t shift the problem of homophobia onto this child and blame the victim. No one needs to police his authenticity, he just needs a supportive environment in order to explore his sense of self.

  • Shannon1981

    Love this! This kid is just awesome, and kudos to Rosie and Rupaul for putting this together for him.

  • Shannon1981

    @tookietookie: Exactly. If it had been acceptable 25 years ago, I am pretty sure that lots of young LGBT people would have been expressing more overtly their true selves.

    @Spike: Pretty obvious this kid is queer, whether they imply it or say so in the segment or not. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the headline, its cute.

  • Bob

    Hell….11 years old? Some of us were already experimenting by then.

  • Gigi

    So much overt and internalized homophobia from many of the posters.

    @MEH You admitted as much. Gay boys in our day were “just like every other boy, except they were effeminate.” Maybe that’s because we were terrified of getting the crap beaten out of us. I grew up in a town of 14 000 and I tried to butch it up as best I could be it was still torture. Ben seems pretty confident about who he is.

    @Spike You’ve proven my point. Being gay is NOT BAD. My gaydar is pretty good and it’s ringing like crazy when I see sweet, young Ben. I only wish that I’d have had such a supportive mother as his tender age.

  • Spike

    @Gigi Nice that you use your gaydar to sniff out 11 year olds based on their behavior, what next, you going to start calling out 7 year olds? And thanks for labeling me as having internalized homophobia, esp given that my point was to let the kid be a kid without assuming any sexual orientation, he’s 11 for christ sake!

    BTW you should write for Queerty, your POW would fit right in with their mean girl ugliness.

  • Aaron

    Well at least your recognize your internalized homophobia. Lots of books on how to work through it.


    I saw the whole thing. The kid did not identify himself as gay. He identified himself as different from most. Why call him gayby before he gets to discover and make a decision for himself? In your attempts to come up with catchy titles for your posts, they often come across as ignorant and insensitive. It’s great that you commented on the segment but the gayby thing, really?

  • Stephen

    Spike and Jeremie are totally right–this is major bullying on part of Queerty. Referring to an eleven year old kid as “gayby”?!?!? Why can’t he be into fashion design, be effeminate and be straight. this is imposing every gay stereotype on a kid who doesn’t even know if he’s gay. The title for the post is beyond insensitive. Your gaydar works on 11 year olds—lol! Have fun in prison, fool!

  • Giselle

    Cool! That kid was listening avidly while his hero was on. He was loving every minute of it. If that had been me with my hero I would have been so star-struck I wouldn’t have been able to take a thing in, it would have all gone by in a blur. But not little Ben, he wasn’t just enjoying this meeting, he was listening closely and taking it all in. Such presence and assuredness in someone so young. Good for him!
    Love the whole thing.

  • MEJ


    I did not shift the problem of homophobia onto this boy, nor am I blaming any victims of homophobia, or femme-phobia. I am not in any way dictating how he should be, or act. What I am is being honest in my discomfort when children act a certain way. Why they “act” a certain way on their own, I don’t know. I seriously doubt the kids in beauty pageants would act as they do, if not for the adults around them. But by your own admission, adults project their issues onto children.

    Whether he is the way he is because that is what he sees in media, and assumes he must mimic that personality to be involved in fashion; or because he’s a bright, gregarious kid, I don’t know. But I hope that is his genuine personally, and not something he is copying simply because the only representations of effeminate men in media are the outrageous characters presented to us by the straight media.

  • MEJ


    Exactly. If it had been acceptable 25 years ago, I am pretty sure that lots of young LGBT people would have been expressing more overtly their true selves.

    Or would they just have copied what they saw in the media? I knew boys were would go full on Boy George at the height of Culture Club’s popularity. They weren’t naturally inclined to do that, but copied what they saw in the media. I’m sure decades later they are still effeminate, but not wearing man dresses, and shoulder length crimped hair-do’s

  • MEJ


    I’m pretty sure femme boys still got beat up, even being quiet, and none-threatening to anti-gay bigots.

  • MEJ


    There’s nothing I need to work through, or out. My boyfriend is effeminate. He was when I first met him, when I asked him out, and when we moved in together. I think the people who refuse to admit they have internalized homophobia, are the people who need to work things out.

  • mk_ultra_again

    Ahh we must have some enlightned commentaters from TN. Should we institute a policy on Queerty? Don’t say Gay bill, right here on this site?&. Should we tell kids “you’re not really gay. That’s a bad word. It’s just adults forcing theie adult perogative on tou. ?” Why don’t some of you take your own advice wnd not label this kid? Can you juat say that it’s great for him to go on tv, meet his hero, and be himslf. You know without all the childish banter that he’s too ‘feminine’ (because some gay men hatw that and they blame the media for the curse of femeninity) or proposing that he might be gay being a cardinal sin. I mean, talk about homophobia for thw community, directed at the community. Would some of you homo-homophobes have a problem if he acted straight and his hero was a football player? yeah I didn’t think so….

  • Sophie


    It’s sad that something so wonderful as a young kid meeting his idol makes you uncomfortable. So what if he conforms to SOME stereotypes – you think that because you’ve seen this clip, and know that he loves fashion and RuPaul, you know this kid at all? Stop judging a child, seriously. It’s embarrassing.

  • Zeus

    Ru Paul is SO skinny. His legs look like they could break right in half.

  • Paul Mc

    Saying an 11 yr old boy is a gay is NOTHING to do with adult matters. Gay is not an insult or a state of physical intimacy. It just is. The kid just ‘is’. At 11 year I sure had a good idea about who I was.

  • MEJ


    I can’t beleive I wasted my time reading your comment.

  • MEJ


    What’s embarrassing is that you posted a comment with not one interesting point, or idea.

    The fact is that a lot of gay men feel like I do, but very few have the backbone to admit it. They justify, or deny their internalized homophobia, but never acknowledge it.

    I’ve always felt it takes more guts to leave the house every morning being an effeminate man, or overtly masculine woman, than the great majority of straight people could ever understand. And yet these femme boys, and butch girls do just that–everyday of their lives.

  • ChrisC

    How is saying that this boy is acting the way he acts because of what he see’s on TV, any different than homophobes who say that kids will “turn Gay” if they see Gays on TV. Let the kid act the way that he wants to act. Jesus.

  • mk_ultra_again

    @MEJ: Maybe you should have. It would have enlightened you. I mean ypu’ve embarassed yourself all over this board and everyone has pointed it out.

  • mk_ultra_again

    @MEJ: Maybe you should have read more carefully. It would have enlightened you. I mean ypu’ve embarassed yourself all over this board and everyone has pointed it out.

  • BHWA

    Homophobia is such an insidious thing, isn’t it? The video clip simply showed an 11 year old boy who’s a passionate fan of RuPaul. He obviously is passionate about fashion. Why is it uncomfortable for people to think he might be gay? If he was a boy passionate about football and has a crush with a female celebrity, would we feel uncomfortable as well? Until society reach the understanding consciously and subconsciously that homosexuality is as normal as heterosexuality, we would still encounter homophobic comments here. Is it really brave to post one’s internalized homophobia and try to justify it? I think one should reflect on it and see that a video like this is simply meant as a positive example of children expressing they’re desires without parental repression … specially when they don’t harm anyone at all. So the term ‘gayby’ has no malicious intent at all, because the word ‘gay’ isn’t considered negative in whatsoever context here.

  • Esculapio Mitiríades Torquemada de la Cueva

    I don’t really care one way or the other about the debate going on here. But can we please put “internalized homophobia” on the shelf for a while? It seems like every time two gay people disagree about something pertaining to homosexuality, one of them accuses the other of “internalized homophobia.” It’s kinda becoming a bullshit term.

  • Charley

    Does the young man have a FATHER? You know, a supportive MAN who is a positive male role model that the boy respects, loves and looks up to? Why isn’t he sitting next to his son on the couch with the Mom?

  • phuckinphreak

    How great are the times we live in when at 11, a gay or maybe gay boy can feel free to be who is is

  • twrightfield

    @Charley: If YOU go to the show’s site. You can watch the video before and it looks like he does have a FATHER. Why isn’t he sitting next to his son? I am not sure maybe he doesn’t like RuPaul or maybe Rosie only payed for his mother to come along.

  • Bob

    @Shannon1981: Agreed. Cute and so what if he’s only 11. 11 but very, very beautiful and he surely seemed to be awfully sweet. He’ll go far in life.

  • Rick

    @Charley Happily Ben does have a supportive father as demonstrated by the clips played before the interview (which are on the shows website). Perhaps both parents were not able to take off from work the day the show taped and that is why only the mother is present.

  • Michael DeSelms

    @Spike: Thank you. There is no inference to his sexuality. If thats the case…then 90% of european and asian men are gay. Femininity doesent always mean gay. That stereotype just leads to more bullying.

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