Now that California Governor Jerry Brown has signed a bill to outlaw reparative therapy, we’ll hopefully be hearing fewer stories like the one above. Mathew Shurka, 24, explains how when he was 16 he was pressured into “therapy” by his father, who flew him out to California to work with a counselor who promised to turn him heterosexual in six weeks. (Six weeks!)
The therapy—essentially training Mathew to walk and dress “straighter”—went on for five years, unsuccessfully (as if we needed to tell you that). Finally, at age 23, Matthew accepted himself as “who I am and always have been.” Mat seems to be doing a lot better, speaking openly about his experience in this unique It Gets Better video.
Source: Box Turtle Bulletin
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I cried like a baby when I watched this video. This man is so sweet and wonderful. I came out to my parents at 15 in 1975 after years of psychotherapy. Of them trying to FIX the sissy. I was kicked out, left to live or die in this world alone. MY parents are DEAD yet I live. I have a lover, a cute little puppy, a home and a life. SO YES IT GETS BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The American Psychological Association, the American Psychiatric Association, and the National Association of Social Workers identify sexual orientation as “not merely a personal characteristic that can be defined in isolation. Rather, one’s sexual orientation defines the universe of persons with whom one is likely to find the satisfying and fulfilling relationships”:[2]
Sexual orientation is commonly discussed as a characteristic of the individual, like biological sex, gender identity, or age. This perspective is incomplete because sexual orientation is always defined in relational terms and necessarily involves relationships with other individuals. Sexual acts and romantic attractions are categorized as homosexual or heterosexual according to the biological sex of the individuals involved in them, relative to each other. Indeed, it is by acting—or desiring to act—with another person that individuals express their heterosexuality, homosexuality, or bisexuality. This includes actions as simple as holding hands with or kissing another person. Thus, sexual orientation is integrally linked to the intimate personal relationships that human beings form with others to meet their deeply felt needs for love, attachment, and intimacy. In addition to sexual behavior, these bonds encompass nonsexual physical affection between partners, shared goals and values, mutual support, and ongoing commitment.
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The American Academy of Pediatrics stated in Pediatrics in 2004:
“ Sexual orientation probably is not determined by any one factor but by a combination of genetic, hormonal, and environmental influences. In recent decades, biologically based theories have been favored by experts. Although there continues to be controversy and uncertainty as to the genesis of the variety of human sexual orientations, there is no scientific evidence that abnormal parenting, sexual abuse, or other adverse life events influence sexual orientation. Current knowledge suggests that sexual orientation is usually established during early childhood.[4][134][135] ”
The American Psychological Association states “there are probably many reasons for a person’s sexual orientation and the reasons may be different for different people”, and says most people’s sexual orientation is determined at an early age.[1] Research into how sexual orientation in males may be determined by genetic or other prenatal factors plays a role in political and social debates about homosexuality, and also raises fears about genetic profiling and prenatal testing.[136]
Professor Michael King states: “The conclusion reached by scientists who have investigated the origins and stability of sexual orientation is that it is a human characteristic that is formed early in life, and is resistant to change. Scientific evidence on the origins of homosexuality is considered relevant to theological and social debate because it undermines suggestions that sexual orientation is a choice.”[137]
NotStr8Acting
Congrats to him for overcoming the intolerance in his surroundings…standing above it, and being true to HIMSELF.
These ex gay conversion therapy programs have resulted in the death of so many of our young gay kids. We owe it to them to be a voice for the voiceless. I hope more states join California on this humane cause and crusade to help our youth.
Darling Nikki
Thank you Mathew. This is truly an inspirational clip. I’m so glad that you survived that ordeal.
randolph bermudez
wow very touching and inspirational
mathew you are a very brave man