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WATCH: Bieber-esque Toddler Pulls Out the Lady Gaga Guns


When we first saw this clip of Britain’s Got Talent contestant Ronan Parke, we thought it was LaRoux singer Elly Jackson with a new hairdo. You can’t really fault us: The little bugger is all of 12 years old.

Maybe it’s Parke’s Justin-Bieber-meets-Jimmy-Osmond face, but there’s something unsettling about a kid this young being made over into a emo tween dream and singing, “I got a reason you’re who should take me home tonight.” Or maybe we’re just uptight old queens.

Then again, Parke already has a whiff of scandal about him:

Earlier this summer, rumors began circulating that Simon Cowell (who produces the show) had been secretly coaching the kid over the last two years. In case you can’t do the math, that would mean Simon was trolling the playground when Ronan was 9 or 10. A police investigation was started (don’t you wish the cops would investigate every nasty thing posted about you?) and  the source of the rumor was a 52-year-old blogger.

Ugh, and it just got even creepier.


On:           Aug 1, 2011
Tagged: , , , ,
    • damendo

      Kids got a great voice, just wondering how is it gonna change here in a year or so.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 7:37 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Adam

      @damendo: Thats how I always feel when people promote pre-pubescent male singers – the epitome of counting eggs before they hatch.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 9:13 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Fitz

      I think it’s vulgar to have a child singing this material.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 9:48 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Marti

      Hey! You kicked us out of the parades, and your organizations – we were somehow “bad”!

      Now you’re butting in on one of our favorites?

      Shame! Shame!Shame on you all!

      You’ve got your hairy old men. Leave our angels alone!!!

      He’s ours! ALL ours!


      Aug 1, 2011 at 10:15 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ian

      First saw the headline and thought — oh god, another youtube “sensation.” But the kid has a pretty good voice. Good luck to him.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 11:21 am · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • David Gervais

      I like his voice. Listen to his voice without the video, do not judge him by his (temporary) appearance.
      I think he’d be great at some country songs as well.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 4:32 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • TommyOC

      Please tell me this little boy isn’t wearing jeggings.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 6:39 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Zack

      wonderful voice, but i am a uptight old queen when a 12 year old sings about being taken home tonight. They could have changed that line.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 6:49 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • The Artist

      Kids got talent! And the song is just a song. Maybe he can do a rendition of Darling Nikki. ;-) PEACELUVNBWILDYALL!

      Aug 1, 2011 at 8:30 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Pip

      omg so gross. i’m sick of 7 year olds like singing about like sex and their intense magical forlorn romances. that kid needs to spend more money on pop rocks and video games and way less money on his fuckin hair cuts.

      Aug 1, 2011 at 9:06 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • sam

      @Pip: You realise this song is about death, not sex, right?

      Aug 1, 2011 at 10:01 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Vevar

      verification to those who think it’s disgusting he’s singing this song…. gaga wrote this about her grandfather passing away .. the edge of glory refers to time just before death … so umm as usual stop judging gaga and this little boy without getting your facts straight

      Aug 1, 2011 at 10:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • slvr

      Greets to ‘No. 4’

      Yes, you are just uptight old queens.. Ronan wasn’t ‘made into’ anything.. this is how he naturally is. You guys (and queens) haven’t seen the half of him in this post, he’s as camp as they come. Hardly a toddler.




      Aug 2, 2011 at 1:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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