This sweet and sexy short film Knowing created by Impulse Group uses a non-preachy and superhot take on a very important subject: knowing your HIV status. Come for the hunky and nearly naked lead actor, stay for the steamy sex scene, leave with an important lesson learned.
STATUS UPDATE
WATCH: Knowing Your HIV Status Just Got A Lot Sexier (NSFW)
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Scribe38
I really like the message of this video. The biggest thing to me is being honest with your status. Let me make the decision of what I am getting into. Personally I am not going to run. I sort of assume, at least sexually, that everyone is POS and always wear a rubber.
Rockery
@Scribe38:
Yeah but I doubt that will happen (people being honest) until the stigma is lifted. I too assume everyone is poz.
This was a great video but probably not realistic. But great none the less
Side note: I thought it would be tame when I saw it was on YouTube, surprised it has not been flagged down
johnn123
i’d rather not have sex than take an hiv test. although i have never ever (not even once) had un safer sex i still got soooo bugged out doing tests i just stopped over two years ago. last time i thought i was going to puke waiting for my results. i never understood this “just assume everyone is poz” thing, if i did that i couldnt have sex with the guy i’d just be way too preoccupied that something would go wrong to be able to enjoy sex. its kinda sucks but then i try to remember what i used to feel like sitting there waiting for results wondering if some how i fucked up
TheNewEnergyDude
I can’t believe the unsafe practice as that phone could’ve easily fell into the tub!
In all seriousness, good message. And that ending was hot. And also sweet. 🙂
viveutvivas
@john, you can now buy a home test at your ph*rmacy (darn Queerty censor) that gives results at home within 20 minutes. That cuts down a lot on the waiting in fear.
But I would really also recommend that you talk to a counselor about your phobia. It sounds as if it is preventing you from enjoying your life, and you only have one life.
johnn123
i used to have A LOT of sex especially when i first came out few years ago, hell some of my friends did porn. the problem was as time went on i found out more and more guys were lying to me i guess i was stupid in the begining thinking no one would lie about status, eventually it just began to freak me out. i just figured i was playing with fire and eventually my luck would run out. i get urges and opportunity to have sex but i just think about having to go through the whole testing thing and that kinda kills my boner. on one hand it is a great feeling knowing i’m ok. how can you have sex with a guy when you know hes poz how do you not become preoccupied with watching everything and becomming overly cautious? i honestly dont know how to do that…and thank you for responding to me ..very nice of you !
Stache1
@johnn123: Sweety how old are you? You sound kind of young. When I was younger nobody was more paranoid then myself. So I understand that.
Every time you get in the car, plane, etc, you take some kind of risk. However, I need a car to get to work so I accept that risk. Risk is part of life.
If you take precautions your risk is almost 0. However, I know in your mind it will never be enough for me to just tell you that.
AuntieChrist
@johnn123: This may not help. But I am HIV positive and my not legal husband of 24 years is negative. 24 years and he is fine. I too am quite healthy. So it is smart to be safe but you are getting yourself upset and stress is very bad for you. Be happy and enjoy life. Just remember sweet pea. NO GLOVE, NO LOVE.
AuntieChrist
@johnn123: Oh yea, one more thing. I have to get my T-Cells checked every three months. Can you imagine what THAT must be like? I have beat all the odds and still have an undetectable viral load… Yet am told it is only a matter of time… So far I have proved them wrong. But hey. Who wants to live forever?
Stache1
@AuntieChrist: Great advise Aunti. You know I wish that I had a time machine to go back and slap the shit of my former overly paranoid self. I’d be saying WTF are you doing. Get out and live your life. Stop the stressing out over trivial BS. As viveutvivas says. We get one and only one life.
Scribe38
@viveutvivas: I love the home HIV test. I take it roughly every two months because I run a little on the paranoid side of things. I would take a partner who was POS but taking meds and honest about viral load over a guy who has never been tested and refuses to be tested. @AuntieChrist: Best wishes, so happy things are working out for you.
johnn123
@Stache1: i appreciate your response to me. i am not young i came out pretty late in life and as i said had some really crazy years, i just seemed to become more afraid as time went on. i have ALWAYS used condoms 100% of the time i have NEVER BB EVER. however i have many poz friends who tell me they did everything right too. i just started to become preoccupied with everything the other guy was doing, did he get a bit of cum on his finger did that finger go in my ass? was there cum on his hand and it got on the condom?? with all the crazy (wonderful fun lol) sex i had i just started to feel my luck had to run out. hiv dies in the air but hiv lives encapsulated in the semen until the semen has dried, this was told to me by an hiv counselor. its not like i am going crazy not fucking , whats hard is that it becomes a deal breaker at times. its been over 2 years now that i’ve not fucked and honestly its not always easy turning down guys, my friends are having a sex party tonight in fact! >>>>> so let me ask you something WHY is it that even after a person uses condoms all the time ..total safer sex, are they still told to get hiv tested??? wrap it they say and dont worry? BUT get tested? WHY ?
johnn123
@Stache1: how is getting hiv trivial bs?
AuntieChrist
@Stache1: I personally am a great fan of the concept of reincarnation. I do not subscribe to it but I am a fan. LOL : )
johnn123
@AuntieChrist: i am glad you are so healthy and so is your Bf. i am sure it must very hard havingt oi go get checked every three months i would not want you to think i was being disrespectful. i understand the driving the car is a risk thing but i guess i think you have to work get up go drive but i guess i dont see fucking as something you literally need to do to live. i admit i do at times miss the crazy fun i had. just going out with my porn star friends could have been made into a movie ;-0)
Merv
Frankly, I don’t think it’s paranoia. The HIV rate among gay men is insanely high. In San Francisco, it’s around 25% (it used to be 33%). Also, the idea of trusting your life to a piece of latex a few microns thick. Condoms break, and usually at the worst possible time. The first line of defense is reducing the number of partners. Every partner should be tested, and you should insist on seeing the results yourself. If you still want to proceed, use a condom and check it often. There’s also a lot to be said for avoiding anal sex completely. For a lot of people, it’s just not worth the risk.
Stache1
@johnn123: Well, I sure got that wrong. Funny those late in lifers are usually the ones that party like a rockstar too. Guess there’s exceptions to everything.
You know I have friends like that too. They were all innocent like yours of course. Yet these same friends ie sluts were all doing it 6 ways to Sunday if you know what I mean.
Btw I didn’t say Hiv was trivial bs. I was just talking to Aunti in a general way about life. Reincarnation or whatever. Lol
Degas
@johnn: You’re a grown man. There is no way of knowing until you get tested. Put on your big boy pants and take the damn test! Stay safe with either result and enjoy your life. I take it yearly, even though I’m in a long term, monogamous relationship. My doctor wants to see a clean bill of health as part of my annual physical and includes an HIV test. Man-up, already!
johnn123
when i WAS sexually active i DID take the test so as you say i have always “man’d up” . my point was that after having sex for years, i began to realize that guys were lying about their status and i just became more and more paranoid about my luck eventually running out, even though i ALWAYS 100% of the time, used condoms, shit can happen. i have NOT tested in over two years now because i have not had any sex since my last test over two years ago. i agree with you that theres no way of knowing unless you get tested and i DID get tested. i would just get so freaked out wondering if i fucked up or my luck ran out that it seemed easy not to have sex so i didnt have to take the test
tardis
@johnn123: Like you, I too have few, and I mean few, sex partners because the whole HIV things preoccupies my mind a little way too much. It’s not that I’m paranoid; it’s more that I’m cautious and aware. If I’m not in a relationship, I’m not having sex. Yes, we only got one life to live, but that doesn’t mean one should be irresponsible. So, you shouldn’t have a fear of testing. Testing helps you in that you’re aware of your status so that you can appropriately take steps in treatment. Basically, what’s done is done. I think you should probably be in a commuted relationship, and most importantly you should leave your paranoia at the door. Too much worrying can drive a person over the edge. Just live your life responsibly.
johnn123
thanks for your comments, i have decided to be responsible first of all i always used condoms but since i cant stand getting tested , and i know having sex like i used to (hook ups, sex parties, manhunt, lucky nights at a bar etc etc) would mean that i should get tested ..i just stopped fucking ..thats very responsible i think. i really think a lot of guys are not being honest if they are saying they dont get nervous when they get tested, in spite of them using condoms.
Degas
No, johnn, you are not being responsible. You are burying your head in the sand out of fear. Part of knowing your status is so you can make good health choices for YOU. If, and that’s a big if, as you play safe, you test positive, you can make good choices on how to take care of yourself. Getting tested isn’t all about sex. It’s about health. Once you know your status, even though it’s scary the first time, you can make some decisions about what to do IF you are positive. Take the test at home, go to a clinic, go with a friend, a family member, damn, I’ll go with you. Just take the test. Again, it’s not about sex, it’s about health. It doesn’t matter if you f*ck or not. What matters is your health, both physical and mental. So, stop making excuses and get tested for YOU. Taking the test is being responsible. Then, be honest with yourself with the results, and always use common sense before you put the condom on.
Degas
Oh, of course it’s difficult to do. Every year I take the test I panic. It’s a natural and normal feeling. But it isn’t an excuse for not getting tested! In the bad old days, we had to wait a week for the results. Today, the results are ready in less than twenty minutes. That’s why I recommend doing it with a trusted friend or family member. Start by looking where the clinics are in your area. The advantage to the clinics are that you are anonymous and they usually offer counseling for all sorts of issues. They give away free condoms, too!
johnn123
@Degas: I AM BEING RESPONSIBLE. i think you missed what i am saying I DID GET TESTED I AM NEG. i was tested two plus years ago. at that time when i found out i tested neg i STOPPED having sex. i dont need to get tested anymore because i’ve not had sex in the last 2.5 yrs . my point in all this discssion is the test is so unnerving to me that AFTER i tested NEG i decided to cool it sex wise so i dont have to get tested anymore.
Degas
Wow, you decide to stop having sex because you are afraid of taking the test? I don’t understand the logic. Of course hook ups and sex party types lie about their status. So, change YOUR sexual behavior, if and when you become active again. That means actually getting to know someone before having sex and or being in a monogamous relationship. Come on now, johnn, jump back on the horse!
johnn123
@Degas: yeah basically thats it, i would just get so unnerved getting up the guts to go …then having it done and waiting. the last test i had was that swab test so i didnt wait that long. i admit i miss all that crazy sex (OMG i loved sex parties yes i know i was a slut) and fun but each time i’d come across someone lying or poz i had sex with i just kept thinking could i have fucked up somehow. i talked to the hiv counselors and they said keep doing what i am doing and i’ll be fine BUT heres the kicker they STILL tell you to get tested EVEN IF you are using condoms 100% of the time this is why i think the condom thing is overrated. i guess you cold say i have changed my sexual behavior … i stopped ha ha lol
Degas
@johnn: You mention not fucking and not having sex. Are you abstaining? No oral, no messing around, no contact at all? I understood you got tested, and that you just stopped fucking. Some people consider not fucking tantamount to not having sex. There are risks to oral sex and it is why many men who do “everything right” are bewildered when the test comes back positive.
Matt
I’ve never been tested. HIV tests are for anal gays. Everyone’s always saying that HIV/AIDS is not just a gay disease but other than Africa it really is primarily a gay disease. Nobody seems to know any straight people with it in developed countries. These gay fundraisers are all geared toward HIV/AIDS as if that was the only disease you can get. Throwing condoms off parade floats and whatnot is getting tired. When you get involved with scat, there’s always a price to be paid. Condoms, lube, play safe, get tested, yeah right!
johnn123
@Degas: the only contact ive had was a little huggy kissy stuff and a guy or two grabbed my crotch last summer at a camp ground i go to, another guy jo me but that was it didnt kiss or touch him …ive been celebate for over 2.5 yrs its getting easier …i think lol
Degas
@johnn: Liking sex, lots of sex, sex parties, does not make you a slut. Just means you like sex. Who doesn’t? Anyway, the stuff you describe sounds sexy to me. Go with it, build on it slowly. How about working on making taking the test in the future less scary and opening yourself to the possibly of a fulfilling sexual life a reality? A fulfilling sexual life does not require anal sex or even kissing. There are tons of incredibly pleasurable activities without any exchange of bodily fluids. You sound like a healthy, virile man. It sounds very extreme to be celibate when you could have a healthy and safe sexual life. Why shut yourself off from the beauty and pleasure of sex out of fear?
johnn123
@Degas: well yes youre right theres lots of stuff to do but not fucking or sucking has been a deal breaker..my fault i agree but you know not many guys out there just wanting to do the touchy feely stuff. but thx
Stache1
@Matt: Really? You might want to inform the Straight Porn industry then. Apparently, according to you they don’t need to be wasting money testing or any other kind protection for their actors anymore because HIV is just for the gays.
What a misinformed dufus you are.
Aires the Ram
If you want to live your life “safely”, then one can use the questionable logic of ‘staying indoors’. But, one must consider any number of diseases and maladies that can affect human beings. If you ‘stay indoors’ out of fear of something happening to you, are you fully living your life, or cowering in fear of your own eventual death? We all must leave here, we all will leave here. Choose how you spend your allotted time.
krystalkleer
hey you don’t be silly…put a rubber on yer willy!
http://getoffmydress.blogspot.com/2013/11/buff-n-puff.html
DonW
Sweet film, and an important message. But why is it assumed guys have to default to anal sex the first time they mess around? Why not work up to it on a third date or something? It’s safer, and that way you save something for dessert.
hotshot70
I hope one day they can give you a shot that cures HIV. Like a flu shot. Or, if you find out you have HIV, pop a Tylenol-HIV and you are cured. Maybe one day…
johnn123
@Aires the Ram: good point you are correct, i suppose all of us must find that balance between what we feel is acceptable reasonable risk and what we feel is too risky. i guess i’ve found that tipping point for me…