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What Happens When a Son Tells His Mother He Is Gay. In Botswana

We read hundreds of stories every year about American children coming out to their parents, and how sometimes that conversation goes swimmingly, and other times it ends with exile. So here’s a story from Francistown, Botswana (the country’s second-largest city), where one mother shares the story of her 24-year-old son coming out.

After learning her son was gay, Mmegi reports, first came the crazies: “I lost my son, though he is still alive and we are living under the same roof. On that day, I did not know what to say to my son. I was not sure whether he was still my real son or not. But physically he was still the same.”

Then the cold sweats: “That word [gay] was like a deadly blow that knocked me off. I felt confused. I started sweating. My whole world was crumbling. I could see my world falling apart in front of my eyes. I felt like my son is no more though he was right there beside me.”

Then acceptance: “I had to accept that my son is different from others. I accepted that the few girlfriends that I have seen and even the last beautiful one who was officially introduced to me was just one of the many attempts by my son to fight off the truth that was burning inside him.”

And deliverance: After counseling sessions, she began to believe “as human beings, we are different. It is not an easy thing but I have no choice here because he is my son, my own blood and flesh that I carried for nine months. I therefore cannot disown him because of his condition.”

Finally, joy: “At least he was able to be assertive and bold enough to tell me the truth. I will always love him and respect him for that.”

[photo via]

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8 Comments

  • hotone2me

    This is a story about true unconditonal love.. “You Go Mom”!!!

  • tjr101

    In a perfect world all coming out stories will end like this. Truly beautiful!

  • ChiGuy76

    It’s good to hear about positive LGBT rights advancements out of Africa for a change. If more stories like these get the spotlight, maybe more Africans will turn away from the harsh rhetoric of the hate-mongers and embrace LGBT’s.

  • samthor

    glad to hear that love, compassion and intelligence still exists

  • Red Meat

    It took my mom around .4 seconds to say “yeah, OK” after I said the I and gay word in the same sentence. Just to brag about my mother here.

  • asa1973

    It would be so wonderful to see these testimonies from parents worldwide about their lgbt children. I always say, for the ones who learn to accept, coming out is as much a process for parents of lgbt children as it is for their children. We need so hear about so many more stories about these journeys toward acceptance…

  • soakman

    This actually sounds almost identical to the reaction my mother had. What a mess it is to watch the process, but I guess there is a ‘norm’ for the route to acceptance as a parent. :/

    Hm.

  • Arnold

    we just hv to shed our phobias n embrace LGBTI..this one world is enuff 4 all of us..

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