Yup, it’s Michael Urie’s business if he’s gay or not. But the Ugly Betty actor dodging the question about his own sexuality only acknowledges what the viewing public already knows: Marc St. James is both gay on screen and off. Maybe he’s coy about his man-loving not because he’s afraid he’ll lose out on roles, but because he doesn’t want the celeb press prying into his private life? It’s a reasonable argument, given most tabs are still willing to play hands off with closeted celebs — but once you come out (Lance Bass, Marc Jacobs, Neil Patrick Harris) the gloves come off.
Says Urie: “Well, that’s my M.O. I’m interested in keeping — you know, actors have to be able to do lots of different things, and while I’d say there’s an ongoing theme [to the parts I play], I’m also not interested in having any real publicity about who I am and what my private life is and things like that. I’m an actor and I don’t want to be a [fill-in-the-] blank actor. … By using publicity to say something like [“I’m gay”], it could become a person’s M.O, and I’m not interested in that. I really think this article should be about The Temperamentals [the play he’s starring in]. I understand where you’re coming from and why you think this is important and that this is a play about being true to yourself. But artists and activists … [I]t’s been a long time since anyone [reporters] asked it. I don’t think it’s really newsworthy if the gay guy from Ugly Betty is gay or not.”
Freida
Maybe because it’s none of our business.
Disgusted American
maybe cause when he’s acting on Ugly Betty…he’s just being Himself?
Wesley
I don’t think it really matters if he comes out or not; it’s not as if sexuality really defines who someone really is as a whole.
HayYall
@Freida: You got it.
Topher
But don’t we have a right to know? Doesn’t his refusal to answer the question send the implicit message that there is something so wrong about homosexuality that it should be hidden from the public? Or if there is a fear of backlash, shouldn’t we be privy to that so we can stand up in support of actors who are discriminated against for their sexuality?
People don’t become actors because they like their privacy and anonymity and famous heterosexuals have no more privacy in their romantic and sexual lives than homosexuals. These arguments about protecting privacy for celebrities is baseless at best, and giving closeted actors and newsmen a pass in the media and public arena supports the belief that our loves are shameful and should be hidden for fear of retaliation.
Until we stand up, everyone from bus drivers to CEOs to actors, no one will every take us seriously. How can they when they don’t even know who we are?
james ii
coming out sure doesn’t seem to have hurt neil patrick harris…
and maybe it’s not any of our business, but if he [or any actor who skirts the issue] were straight, would he still be reluctant to say who he was or who he was dating? look at any of those celeb magazines, that are filled with who’s dating whom and who’s been seen with whom stories and pictures…to ‘report’ on them but keep your mouth shut about gay (or possibly gay) celebs is kind of a double standard, isn’t it?
naprem
Perhaps he’s actually… you know… NOT GAY. Such people do exist.
j
F**kingJudasLeaveThisSite. >:)
ben
How can you say that the press has been kind to Neil Patrick Harris. You likely didn’t even remember who Neil Patrick Harris was before he came out and now he’s dogged by the press constantly. I’m sure, for him, it isn’t like being Madonna and being unable to cross a street for all the photogs pressing around you, but you can bet he feels the pressure to behave himself whenever he steps out of his front door.
Michael Urie wants to live like a normal human being with a profession, not a celebrity. I can understand why this idea would be befuddling to the Queerty staffers.
Topher
I don’t think it is befuddling to only the Queerty staffers. What actor on a major network prime-time television show would suggest that he didn’t want to be a celebrity? Putting yourself in the public eye like that basically disallows your opportunity for any real level of privacy.
If he wants to feign a desire for being an actor with real privacy, he might want to start with a new career in dinner theater in Boise. He could probably fly under the radar there.
HayYall
@Topher: No you don’t have a “right” to know.
AlanInSLC
@Topher:
I see…you look for the negative in everything don’t ya?
Matt Nelson
Gay or not, I cannot wait to see The Temperamentals this weekend!
Topher
@AlanInSLC: I’m not looking for the negative. In fact, I think it would be really positive for him to either take a principled stand that actors deserve their privacy and all questions about their personal life are not going to be discussed or if they simply answered the question and moved on. In an interview with AfterElton Michael acknowledges that fans have lots of questions about his sexuality and he understands why, but that it is too complicated to answer.
I don’t think his sexuality, whether gay or straight, is a big deal; however, refusing to answer only that question does make it a big deal. What kind of message does it send to everyone who looks up to him? He doesn’t have to be a crusader for a cause, just a little honesty would be nice.
Bitch, Please!
First off, who cares? And secondly, is anyone here really that clueless? Come on! Was Lambert’s “coming out” that big of a shock? Well, same thing here. Just let the guy live his life as he sees fit.
Jim
@TOPHER
No. We don’t have a right to know. He’s a private person. He has a job that puts him in public view, but does that give us the right to know every detail about his private life?
Why does it matter whether or not he is gay? We’ve fought for generations to be accepted by the mainstream. Being accepted means that we become a part of the whole, blending in seamlessly. That acceptance means that in a lot of ways we suddenly become unremarkable.
Maybe his refusal to answer simply means that he is trying to be unremarkable. Accepted as part of the whole – just like we’ve been fighting for all these years.
Topher
@Jim: I think it would be far more remarkable for him to reveal his sexuality, whatever it may be, and for society to shrug. There is a difference between being invisible and being unremarkable.
Santino
The Temperamentals was great – nice job, Michael! You play a good gay.
galefan2004
@Freida: I think I’m forced to agree with you. Rather someone wants to come out or not is there choice. Rather someone is gay or not is their business. It has nothing to do with us.
galefan2004
@naprem: Yeah and some of those that are not gay are actually quiet about their personal lives simply because they don’t want to be part of the Hollywood three ring relationship circus.
Freida
@Topher: No we don’t have a right to know. We have a right to enjoy his performance on a weekly basis. If he chooses not to say anything then that is HIS decision, not ours. Sure he may have a lower expectation of privacy given his job, stature, etc., but that doesn’t mean he has to open the door and tell us anything at all.
From Angela Corice of Associated Content:
Johnny Depp is one of the most famous actors in the world, but we don’t constantly see stories on him posted in the tabloids. It’s not that he doesn’t have any drama going on in his life; everyone does right? It just seems like he refrains from speaking about his home life when being interviewed and he doesn’t allow the cameras to catch him in any embarrassing public displays. Even though he lives in London (a far cry from celeb-packed LA) he probably gets his share of photographers following him around, but other than taking pictures they really have nothing more to report on him. I mean, what’s so interesting about a celebrity dropping their kid off at school or walking down the street pushing a stroller?
Stars like Britney Spears tend to end up in the tabloids more because of the things that they allow the public to see, yet they cry invasion of privacy when everyone knows their business. The whole world only knows their business because they put it out there. It is not very hard to keep yourself from being photographed with no underwear on or vomiting on a public street after leaving a club.
TANK
we have a right to know! 9/11!
Otto_Erotica
Because being GAY is a choice!!! DUH! He’s just ‘PLAYING” gay! Just like you and me – all of us who are gay just to be rebellious! Homosexuality is just a word to describe men with undeveloped ‘adult’ sexual leanings. We can ALL BE STRAIGHT and let the ‘normal” people raise their precious children in peace.
Sound Fck’d up???! This is the bullsh@t that gay-haters throw at us all the time. Gay is a choice! You can turn it off for work, turn it on at the bars. And why wouldn’t they believe it? Closet cases and queers who hide behind their ‘privacy’ kerchiefs give more ammo to those that think men suck dick just to annoy the mainstream.
I don’t care if this queen humps men/women/mannequins – he and that IDOL reject lambert should be bitch slapped for their sad, 1992-era, coyness. They are more hurtful to queer visibility than a blatant homophobe. Give me Eminems’s insults, which I can wholeheartedly fight against, over the community coddling these nancy boys need to put aside their over-rated careers and be gay MEN. And when we do confront them, those seeking truth are told to back off! They aren’t ready yet, they need to come out at their own time – but please buy their products and support them b/c you KNOW they are gay.
Hey Urie – You want it both ways? Open your mouth and bend over.
The worst is yet to come: You KNOW that GLAAD and HRC are already minting ‘HERO’ awards for these two gay assholes.
Frank Amsterdam
@Queerty:
And you talk outing-shit about Perez????????? In what way are you different???????????
I Love Perez – mind you – but your stance on Perez does not hold anymore after this post.
@Daniel_Baylis
whatever. let him be in the closest.
Cam
@Freida: @ben: You said “How can you say that the press has been kind to Neil Patrick Harris. You likely didn’t even remember who Neil Patrick Harris was before he came out and now he’s dogged by the press constantly. I’m sure, for him, it isn’t like being Madonna and being unable to cross a street for all the photogs pressing around you, but you can bet he feels the pressure to behave himself whenever he steps out of his front door.
Michael Urie wants to live like a normal human being with a profession, not a celebrity. I can understand why this idea would be befuddling to the Queerty staffers.”
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The key words in your comment being “You likely didn’t even remember who Neil Patrick Harris was before he came out”.
You’re right, and he wouldn’t have been hosting the tony’s or been the toast of New York etc… The fact of the matter is, to the people saying that it’s private and none of our business. i’d buy that IF we didn’t have to hear every frigging detail of EVERY straight actors life all the time. From Angie and Brad’s every damn shopping trip to John Mayer and whoever he is banging, to Jessica Simpson and did she or didn’t she on breast implants etc… If these actors won’t come out because they think Hollywood is homophobic, fine, then I refuse to watch their shows until they do come out. I’m so sick and tired of the “Oh, and actor needs to play many roles and I don’t want to be typecast.” Really? Because heath Ledger had a daughter and was sleeping with women and yet they still cast him as a big ole Mo in Brokeback Mountain.
scott ny'er
@Freida: Agreed. Who really cares? And yeah, it’s none of our business.
angus
None of our business.
John
When does it become our business? Do straight people have to announce they are straight before the press reports on their activities? If a closeted gay actor starts dating, can we report on that? What if the date wants to mention it? How about when the closeted gay actor moves in with a boyfriend, then is it okay to report on it? How about when they get a civil union, domestic partnership, or marriage? Then is it okay to report on it?
How many straight people say it’s no ones business what their sexuality is? Straight people announce all the time they are straight without even realizing it. From talking about who they are dating in an interview, to being seen kissing in public, to getting married in front of their friends and relatives. Someone mentioned Johnny Depp not being in the public eye? Well we sure do know who he’s married to, don’t we?
THE ONLY REASON gay people say it’s no ones business is because we all still think there is something wrong with being gay. Other people will think less of us. Other people will stop watching our movies. Other people might say mean things about me in the press. Well the only way to put a stop to all that crap is for everyone to be out and stop enabling this.
rick
good fucking lord he isn’t a republican elected official, leave the cute boy alone! it ain’t none of anyones fucking business! let him make every cent he can before he comes out you stupid wankers!
rick
who is the editor of this site? this is starting to be absolute bullshit with hints of republicanism self rightousness!
rick
LETS JUST START ASKING ALL MALES IN THE MEDIA AND POLITICS HOW BIG THEIR DICKS ARE AND IF THEY ARE CUT OR NOT!
Adam
Such a classy guy. Love that answer.
Rock
He is gay.
“You’ve never really publicly declared it, but on your own website, you identify yourself as “a member of the LGBT community” and say that organizations that help people with HIV/AIDS or people who are LGBT are “A-Number 1 in my book!”
Jon from Maine
@Freida: ditto
Bobby12
I’m shocked the number of people on here who don’t think it is any of our business. He is a celebrity. We have just as much right to know about his personal life as we know about Madonna, Michael Jackson, Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, etc. We want to be treated the same as straights so if I’m knowing who straight celebs are dating than why shouldn’t we know about who gay celebs are dating. It is 2009 and any actor knows that with an acting career comes interest in their off screen life. If Urie didn’t want the attention he could have become a postal worker, a starbuck’s barista or librarian.
Otto_Erotica
If a persons sexuality is no ones business – then why the hell do you all come to this site? If sexual orientation is irrelevant, then why do we even have this site?
We aren’t asking him what his favorite position is, we’re asking, “You are seeking my attention as a performer and actor, we like you. We like you enough and are curious enough about you that we want to know more. You seem like a handsome, funny, charming gay man, but I might be wrong. Do you have a partner?”
What is so wrong with that? What could possibly be so embarrassing to acknowledge?
Someone said that his desire to stay in the closet “befuddles Queerty staffers” I’m not a staffer, but I’m a gay business owner/writer/activist and yes – It totally F’cking befuddles me why someone thinks ‘acting’ like a gay cliche on TV is acceptable to them but simply acknowledging his normal gay life is unacceptable.
Like these befuddled staffers working as open and HONEST LGBT people, anyone in the public eye hiding behind an increasingly flimsy veil of false propriety and a need for privacy is a SHOCK to us. Anyone parading in gay drag and MINCING on network TV week after week and yet lacks the BALLS to simply say, “I’m gay” is so far from our queer brains that we can’t help but be appalled and seek answers.
Thank the Goddess in all her forms that these Staffers are propelling us forward with these questions and not dragging us back to an era of pre-Ellen SHAME as it appears many responders would like.
jason
Maybe he’s bisexual and doesn’t want to abide by the gay Nazi dictate of “you must be gay if you have any same-sex feelings whatsoever”.
mb00
He’s a total cutie, but it isn’t our business if he’s gay or not. If he wants to stay in the closet or come out screaming, that’s still his business and his alone.
mb00
@rick: Nicely put Rick.
damon459
Would it really change anything if he came out as a homosexual or a bisexual? would you really think he’s a better or worse actor because of what he does off the clock? Do you go around asking your postal carrier, doctor, dentist who they fuck when they aren’t at work? I may be gay but thats not all I am it doesn’t define me as a person anymore then my racial status I’m a person plain and simple. If he wants to come out he will since when is it right to try and force people out would you have liked it if people had forced you out, for the sake of a story in a rag I wouldn’t wipe my ass with? tabloids are garbage people who read them need lives gossip is gossip and every person famous or not has the right to privacy. You want role models start acting like one yourself rather then gossiping over someone you think just might be gay. I see it all to often “we” as a community get so caught up in who is and who isn’t gay we forget we are also people I have many straight people in my life who like me because I am who I am I don’t need to explain I don’t change pronouns and they don’t care because I’m not in their face and because of that they have changed their views and in turn made it easier for others to be who they are. What’s next we force children to tell us one way or the other even if they aren’t sure yet themselves?
Jamie
I think Michael Urie is entitled to make personal decisions for himself, rather than having Queerty make them for him. “Outing” is only justifiable when the person in question has been publicly homophobic, especially if there’s a political dimension to it (Larry Craig, for example, a public opponent of gay rights). Besides, Urie doesn’t appear to be particularly closeted anyway.
Cam
@jason: You said “Maybe he’s bisexual and doesn’t want to abide by the gay Nazi dictate of “you must be gay if you have any same-sex feelings whatsoever”.”
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I always love how when there is a celeb who won’t come out, some bisexual always comes out trotting out the whole “Nazi, labels blah blah blah comment.
londonbridge
It’s his business whether he comes out or not. But c’mon, we all know which side his bread is buttered on.
GENE
@Otto_Erotica:
“I don’t care if this queen humps men/women/mannequins – he and that IDOL reject lambert should be bitch slapped for their sad, 1992-era, coyness. They are more hurtful to queer visibility than a blatant homophobe.”
Adam Lambert is openly gay. He told that he is gay on National TV. And he frankly admits that he is dating a guy. How can you say he is being coy about his homosexuality? IMO, gays like you and that idiot Perez Hilton are why the gay movement has stalled…You attack other gay people that you think are not radical enough.
Cam
@GENE: you said “IMO, gays like you and that idiot Perez Hilton are why the gay movement has stalled…You attack other gay people that you think are not radical enough.”
_________________________________
Considering we just got gay marriage legalzed in several states, the White house is under pressure to remove DADT and congress has introduced ENDA I was just wondering what on earth makes you think the gay movement has stalled?
hephaestion
Wow, Urie is remarkably inarticulate. He needs to learm how to speak in a coherent manner. Then he should realize that in all history no heterosexual has ever refused to tell the world if he is gay or straight. Only self-hating homosexuals do that.
Steve
Who cares? I want his BF Cliff back on the show. Now that’s important.
Otto_Erotica
Hey @Gene – Honesty = Radical??? Whatever.
Anyway, Thanks Cam! No need to respond further!
Funny that ‘Gay Honesty’ -not ‘outing’- got much, MUCH more of a response then anything related to Michael Urie actual career…Maybe he needs a new lesbian agent?
GENE
@Otto_Erotica:
What makes you think Adam Lambert is not honest about his sexuality? As I said, he told that he is gay on National TV. Does he need to say “I’m gay ” in every situation?
james ii
Hep, Topher, Cam:
Yes, yes and yes to each of you. I can’t say anything more that’s better than what you’ve said, other than, i don’t know…ambiguity = shame.
Dusty
No Topher, it does not. It’s none of yours or anyone;s business. I didn’t see anyone jumping up and down demanding that Michael Jackson should have outed himself. By the way: On June 15, 2009, Urie posted a statement on his website about having to miss an AIDS benefit. He then referred to himself as “a member of the LGBT community.”
Gnarls
Not only should every visible actor declare their sexuality, they should also inform the public as to their being a top or bottom, cut or uncut, big or small and their current fetish du jour!
Behind the Armoire
If something is so obvious (his sexuality) that it doesn’t really have to be said, then why should it be denied? Or ignored?
I’m for respecting his privacy and his private life, but his game of peek-a-boo is a little curious.
Grandma Knows
Dude, your Grandma KNOWS already.
niles
because he knows this series won’t last forever, he will need to find other work. making a public proclamation labels one as a “professional gay” – a career killer in all but the most exceptional of cases.
SteveDenver
Maybe he wants to tell his parents first.
Why do we have to know if he’s gay or not, he plays one on TeeVee.
If he were doing and saying things against the community, then by all means OUT him. But if he’s an actor doing his gig and doing a great job, get out of his asshole.
George
“I’m shocked the number of people on here who don’t think it is any of our business. He is a celebrity. We have just as much right to know about his personal life as we know about Madonna, Michael Jackson, Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, etc. We want to be treated the same as straights so if I’m knowing who straight celebs are dating than why shouldn’t we know about who gay celebs are dating. It is 2009 and any actor knows that with an acting career comes interest in their off screen life. If Urie didn’t want the attention he could have become a postal worker, a starbuck’s barista or librarian.”
All of this discussion of “our right to know” is a little nauseating. We don’t have a right to know what he does off camera any more than we have a right to know what Madonna or any of these other celbrities are doing. How ridiculous. These are people and they have as much a right to privacy as the rest of us. He’s not doing anything outlandish that could even be attracting attention and obviously has a desire to keep it that way. And perhaps he became an actor because he enjoys the art, not the celebrity.
As for his desired privacy being “bad for the gay community”? Absurd. Reticence does NOT equal shame in all cases. I actually appreciate his casualness and his saying that his sexuality isn’t newsworthy. He seems to be handling himself with grace, suggesting that the public should care more about him as an artist and less as tabloid fodder.