Will Exodus International’s iPhone App Get Updated To Include A Grindr For Ex-Gays?

Exodus International, the world leader in targeting children, is making good on its new “Simplify, Amplify and Intensify” mantra with the release of its iPhone app. Ooh, a new alternative to Angry Birds to squirrel away my time on the train!

The app, which doesn’t require downloaders to verify their age, offers exciting things like an event calendar, Exodus videos, and a built-in link to its Facebook page. Ex-gays, always so rudimentary! But alas, just like the Manhattan Declaration iPhone app, Exodus’ software program is really just a gateway for gay kids and adults to find a way to hate themselves, but with a fun new technology!

Of course, even if Apple decides to ban Alan Chambers’ malware program, there are still hundreds of other apps out there preaching homophobia. And if the Exodus app sticks around? Well then at least update this thing with fancy new gizmos, fellas! Where’s the ex-gay friend finder, which tracks down fellow former homosexuals nearby? Why isn’t there a newsreader picking up feeds from World Net Daily, CBN, and Focus On The Family? And for the love of god, come up with a photo filter than changes “gay face” into “straight face.”