Marital woes

Woman shocked to discover husband has been soliciting online sex with men, wonders what to do

A Texas woman is at a complete loss after discovering her husband has been soliciting other men for sex on the DL, so she’s writing to Dear Abby for help.

“My husband and I have been married 35 years,” the letter begins. “Our sex life was never very active, but we have been each other’s soul mates and best friends. We had a rough few years early on, but managed to come back together, and our relationship is great.”

Or so she thought.

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She continues: “Recently, while I was setting up new email addresses, I saw some messages he had sent in response to requests from married men looking for sex with other men. I just can’t reconcile this with the man I know; however, I’m sure it’s true.”

So now what? She wonders.

“I’m not sure if I should tell him I know, or if I should try to forget it,” she laments. “After all, I may be the reason he’s looking for sexual satisfaction. More than anything, I’m surprised he’s not looking for a woman. I’m sure confused. What should I do?”

In her response, Abby assures the woman it’s not her fault if her husband is attracted to men.

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“I seriously doubt that this is your fault,” she writes. “Your husband doesn’t look for women to satisfy his sex drive because his orientation may be homosexual (or bisexual) rather than heterosexual.”

She does, however, question whether the couple can truly be soul mates when there is dishonesty happening in their relationship,

“Soul mates and best friends communicate honestly with each other,” she says. “I do think you should level with him about what you discovered. Is his having sex outside of your marriage all right with you?”

Finally, Abby urges, the woman needs to take care of herself and her health.

Related: Straight Guy Seeks Advice After He Decides To Date A Man

“If you have had sexual relations with him over the last few years, make an appointment with your doctor to be checked for STDs,” she advises.

What do you think this woman should do? Should she confront her husband, or let sleeping does lie? Share your advice in the comments below…