I say (D) all of the above!

I know this is mean, but why are all these "ex-gays" so bone ugly? Maybe, just maybe, they got disillusioned with the "gay lifestyle" because they couldn't score???

I didn't want to be catty and say this, nystudman, but I guess I will: when I saw this guy, the scars on his face seemed to indicate four magical letters: m-e-t-h.

I'm not sure what anyone's looks have to do with anything.

"I'm not sure what anyone's looks have to do with anything."

I'm not saying it does. BUT … and this is a theory, understand: Maybe, just maybe, these guys (and girls) are disillusinedwith the gay scene becausethey couldn't make it in said gay scene. So they go running back to their religious roots — unlike those studpuppies who have rejected said roots because they ain't havin no trouble gettin their booty, OK? — and scream, "wah! bad gays! bad gay scene!" In other words, they're losers.

Just a theory.

A theory with a small kernel of credence. I've never seen an attractive ex-gay, but I have seen lots of ex-Mormons, ex-Catholics (okay, some not-so-ex), etc…

I guess it would depend on whether or not they would get more play on the straight scene. Of course, there could be another explanation. The "ugly" guys might have just felt out of place with a gay community that places so much emphasis on physical attractiveness.

"I guess it would depend on whether or not they would get more play on the straight scene." I think an ugly straight man has a more level playing field, yeah.

"The "ugly" guys might have just felt out of place with a gay community that places so much emphasis on physical attractiveness." Yeah, that might be true. Unfortunate as it might be, it still doesn't negate my original point.

"Yeah, that might be true. Unfortunate as it might be, it still doesn't negate my original point."

I just find it hard to believe that they couldn't score. I can that being a little part of it, although I think that a feeling of being ostracized from "gays-at-large" would have more of an effect, if it does. Besides, I'm not so sure that attractiveness has much to do with anyone being an ex-gay or not.

"Yeah, that might be true. Unfortunate as it might be, it still doesn't negate my original point."

I just find it hard to believe that they couldn't score. I can see that being a little part of it, although I think that a feeling of being ostracized from "gays-at-large" would have more of an effect, if it does. Besides, I'm not so sure that attractiveness has much to do with anyone being an ex-gay or not.

Matt, have to respectfully disagree. Having seen a lot of these guys on TV, I'm going to surmise they could. not. score. at. all. And are bittah queens.

Can we at least agree on the self-hating part? If not the "losers" part.

Definitely agree on the self-hating part. Regardless of their backgrounds, one thing the ex-gays all have in common is that they obviously took major issue with being queeah in the first place. Theytend to either associate their "gay days" with the horrible abuse, drug use, homelessness, etc. that happened around that time, or they display an obvious disdain for not fitting their desired gender roles (read, disgruntled sissy boys and fellagirlies). And really, why would it be any different? If you're okay with your place on the Kinsey scale, you're not going to go to conversion therapy. Unless, of course, you fear for your life/safety/good standing with family and peers, which just cycles back to the self-hating part…

We can definitely agree on the self-hating part!

I found a cute one right here!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDn7cEgxvtg

wait wait wait wait:
Martini-boy:
You just PROVED my thesis. This (pretty) cute guy is an EX-EX-gay. NOT an ex-gay. So in other words, he's way too cute not to suck cock.

Got it?

A friend of mine who went ex-gay for a couple of years and returned to the flock later, explained that not getting laid didn't bother him so much; it was not being accepted and not being able to find friends. Sex is important, but I think for most ex-gays the issue is, as Matt wrote, "being ostracized from 'gays-at-large'".

When you have this ideal that comming out will make things easier and opne a new world for you and it does not pan out as planned, that can eb a crushing blow, more so than not getting a blow.

As my friend said, "I came out, was ridiculed, left out, lonely and went back in."

Sadly, the first time he got laid, was with a guy in his ex-gay church group and he later found out it was only a pitty fuck.

Not getting laid is no big deal. Feeling reviled by both the straight world and the gay world hurts, though