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Gay Would-Be Priest Fathers 22 Kids with 17 Lesbians As a Form of “Revenge” on the Church

markus-kIn Munich, Germany, a once-aspiring priest is allegedly spreading his love around as a very popular sperm donor to lesbian couples as a way, he says, of getting “quiet revenge” on the Catholic Church for denying him his vestments.

Markus K. has never slept with a woman, but since fathering his first child nine years ago with a lesbian couple, he hasn’t been able to stop impregnating them. It all started in 1994. Friends had taken the U.S. by storm and Markus decided to do the same to some German ovaries. He had been in seminary in hopes of becoming a priest, but he was forced to leave because he was gay.

“Six years of theology, the Latinum Graecum, Hebraicum, all for naught,” Markus told the Munich Evening News. “My life was at a low point.”

You know what always cheers us up? Ejaculating into a paper cup. Markus felt the same way after seeing a note on the wall from a lesbian looking for a sperm donor. Big mistake. The woman was a bit of a whack — “she wore her first menstrual blood in an amulet around the neck, stuff like that” — but luckily his check bounced, as it were.

Then in 2003, a few years older and wiser and wealthier (he works in insurance) Markus answered an ad from a lesbian couple. Once he met them, he felt they would be good parents. Two attempts and nine months later he had a son. What’s more he didn’t charge the women so it was literally a gift of life.

Once word spread that Markus’ sperm took the HOV-lane to the uterus without paying a toll — well, let’s just say it’s a wonder he’s not incapacitated by severe carpal tunnel. Women just come to his apartment, he gives them the…stuff in a cup and then they go into a separate room to self-baste. See, nothing shady or strange about it. Sure, some of the ladies might “do a headstand after” but “others simply lie down and fall asleep.”

Now 45, Markus has 22 sons and daughters — 12 in Munich, one in Vienna, one in Tuscany, six scattered throughout the rest of Germany and two still on the way. With the birth of the two this summer, he’ll have 12 boys and 12 girls — then he might give it a rest.

The hectic seed-spreading schedule he’s been keeping over the last ten years has taken its toll on Markus’ love life. Turns out guys aren’t lining up to date a guy with more kids than pairs of shoes. His last boyfriend wasn’t too keen on having to deal with Markus’ 17 women and all of his fatherly commitments. Even with all those kids in different places, Markus is no deadbeat dad. He makes sure to see all of them for their birthdays and meets with five of the families every four weeks.

When one of his five-year-olds asked him how many other kids he’s been competing with, Markus began to wonder what other questions will be asked of him once his kids grow up — such as “why?”

“Probably a mix of help, reproductive instinct, loneliness and quiet revenge on the church. I can not be a priest as a gay man,” he said, “but I can reproduce myself as often as I want.”

Photo: Daniel von Loeper, Munich Evening News

(h/t: Gay Star News)

By:           Les Fabian Brathwaite
On:           May 10, 2013
Tagged: , ,

  • 16 Comments
    • xamthor
      xamthor

      but…but gay people can’t have kids?
      Ha.
      As long as it is consensual and he owns up to the agreed responsibility, go team.

      May 10, 2013 at 1:00 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tdx3fan
      tdx3fan

      It is actually pretty common for those that leave the seminary for one reason or another to go the route of happy baby maker. My partners brother left the seminary and went on to have six kids.

      May 10, 2013 at 1:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • miagoodguy
      miagoodguy

      how exactly is that revenge?

      May 10, 2013 at 1:23 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • QJ201
      QJ201

      With 22 kids he is doing better than my dad did with 3 kids after my parents divorced when I was in first grade. Monthly visits? Birthday visits? This guy is a superhero compared to my heterosexual deadbeat dad.

      May 10, 2013 at 1:24 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • technicolornina
      technicolornina

      @miagoodguy: 24 children who are going to say “screw you, Church, and the horse you rode in on.”

      And good riddance, say I.

      May 10, 2013 at 1:37 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tookietookie
      tookietookie

      This is irresponsible and hideous. Revenge on the church? Or revenge on everyone who whose taxes will go to help raise these kids. Not his church. How is this head case getting revenge on his church?

      Boo.

      May 10, 2013 at 2:09 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tdx3fan
      tdx3fan

      @tookietookie: Typical American response (and I am also American). Seriously, you do not think the lesbian mothers were capable of supporting their own children before they had them? Tax dollars will not be used to support these kids.

      May 10, 2013 at 2:27 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • twoguysbrooklyn
      twoguysbrooklyn

      Revenge or stupidity?

      May 10, 2013 at 2:35 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • mpwaite
      mpwaite

      @tookietookie…. Were you dropped on your head as a child??? The fact that you think the government would have to take care of these children. I guess you suppose both the Mom and her partner were BOTH just barefoot and pregnant sitting around eating ice cream and watching ELLEN???? I’m sure these lesbian couples have jobs and can support a child/children. I DO have to commend this guy though.. The fact that he’s taking a “hands-on” mentality for ALL of his children.. WOW!!! That speaks volumes of the type of person he is,and I tip my hat to him… As for you Tookie…the 1950’s called, they want their chauvenistic male attitude back…. and their angora sweater.

      May 10, 2013 at 2:42 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • alterego1980
      alterego1980

      I’m surprised the Lesbians want him around. Especially after knowing how many times he’s done this. I guess I would be afraid of attachment issues and just the oddity of the situation. But hey, since it’s free, I guess the Lesbians are all over it.

      May 10, 2013 at 3:04 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • DuMaurier
      DuMaurier

      “It all started in 1994. ‘Friends’ had taken the U.S. by storm and Markus decided to do the same to some German ovaries.”….Okay, as a ‘Friends’ fan I get the reference, but I’m not sure the writer (or editor) should assume everyone will. As far as some of the disapproving comments go, these women obviously wanted children already and would be getting the sperm somewhere; it’s not as if he’s an irresponsible 19 year-old knocking up high school girls left and right and leaving them stranded.

      May 10, 2013 at 5:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Ogre Magi
      Ogre Magi

      Seems like he is nuttier than chipmunk poop

      May 10, 2013 at 5:53 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tookietookie
      tookietookie

      I wasn’t saying the lesbians were deadbeats. Do you think parents fund 100% of their childrens’ healthcare and education without taxes? What about overpopulation and how gay people buy into consumerism, including the entitled attitude a child in every womb (a chicken in every pot?…maybe you’re the one who is living in the past…) This is actually a gross mix of some of the worst attitudes of capitalist and heterosexual privilege, and for any gay person to adopt some redonkulous victim mentality and use it to spray their seed out of all motivations, self-professed revenge (does that even bother you that these kids were created for that reason? I mean talk about selfish) is just plain wrong, wrong, sick, and wrong. No, this is crazy, just as crazy as any man or woman who thinks they need to have a million kids.

      May 10, 2013 at 6:14 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • tookietookie
      tookietookie

      From an energy perspective, the energy that went into the creation of these children, at least from the father, but I think these women were complicit, is negative karma. The environmental footprint on the earth from his brood…again, did anyone think about that? Selfish.

      Also, I like how the people who responded to me assumed I was accusing the mothers of being welfare recipients or something. That never even crossed my mind. Said more about how you think than how I do.

      May 10, 2013 at 6:18 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • murphy0071
      murphy0071

      @Ogre Magi: You must be a special delicacy tester for a heterosexual scat club.

      May 10, 2013 at 9:07 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·
    • Brian
      Brian

      Markus appears to be an irresponsible queen who is being exploited by creepy lesbians.

      May 11, 2013 at 6:08 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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