The freedom to marry has been a long time coming. Although there have been various socially accepted forms of same-sex cohabitation since, well, Adam & Steve met up, marriage equality was nothing more than a gleam in the eyes of advocates until the 1980s. That’s when Mary Bonauto, Evan Wolfson of Freedom To Marry, thousands of same-sex couples, and legions of others worked tirelessly together to put it on the national agenda.
Now we are on a roll, with a staggering 60 percent of Americans behind our cause and — we hope and expect — the majority of the U.S. Supreme Court.
So Queerty wants to know what you — the people who made this happen — really think about same sex marriage. We’ll let you know the results before the Supreme Court rules on the question near the end of June.
Scroll Down The Survey To Answer….
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
Dakotahgeo
@Dakotahgeo: Well, it took enough time to load the survey!
polarisfashion
I’ll feel excited when I get proposed to.
hyhybt
How do I feel about it? Hopeful that it really does arrive as soon as expected.
Masc Pride
It will make things more fair, but it won’t impact my life much at all. I never plan on marrying again, and I highly doubt a lot of guys will be rushing to the alter either. It’ll be a great day for lesbians though. lol
Kangol
I hope SCOTUS does rule affirmatively on allowing same-sex marriage across the US.
We badly need federal job, housing and anti-discrimination protections for LGBTQ people, though.
petensfo
Marriage Equality is most important to me at the moment, but then I’d like our focus to move to Federal Discrimination protections. Absolutely.
Desert Boy
As the Archie Bunker generation finally dies off, and young Americans move into power, opposition to marriage equality will disappear. I am nervous but, hopeful about the SCOTUS decision. If they fail to strike down the last 13 states that oppose marriage equality, what happens to the estimated 700,000 to 1 million legally married couples? Do we become a separate, but equal sub-class of Americans?
Bauhaus
@Masc Pride:
“It will make things more fair”
No, it will make things fair. Full stop.
“I never plan on marrying again, and I highly doubt a lot of guys will be rushing to the alter either.”
So what. That’s not the point. You ever marrying again, or a lot of guys rushing to the alter. Having the right to marry IS the point, and will be a great day for all of us, not only lesbians.
AtticusBennett
As a Canuck, we’ve had marriage equality for over a decade. How do I feel? I feel like if I choose to marry I’ll be able to, legally. The choice is mine, nobody else’s.
As the GOP continues to waste time and money trying to keep itself in the dark ages, the rest of the thinking world is moving forward.
AtticusBennett
@Bauhaus: of course he never plans on marrying. he never plans on coming out, either. it’s as if these trolls think we believe them to be charismatic well-liked people with social lives. they’re all dorito-dusted basement dwellers who couldn’t get laid if their life depended on it.
MarionPaige
ONE MILLION MARRIED SAME SEX COUPLES is an insignificant number of people.
MarionPaige
As pro-gay as the new Netflix Series Sense8 is, one can’t walk away from the series without getting the impression that gay identity and gender identity issues are FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS, that the third world character (the African Van Drive) is too preoccupied with survival (food, Aids medicine for his mother) to be able to afford the luxury of agonizing about his sexual orientation. Is it merely an accident that the only character in the series NOT shown in a sexual situation is the African Van Driver? http://www.bitchless.net/index.php?showtopic=106449
Masc Pride
@Bauhaus: Calm down. The question was, “How Do YOU Really Feel About The Arrival Of The Freedom To Marry?” My answer was subjective because that’s what was asked, so your hostile critique wasn’t necessary (as usual). Marriage isn’t the only gay issue of concern, so my original statement of making things “more fair” is actually far more accurate than your logic of thinking the right to marry magically solves all inequality. However, I am hoping that this marriage decision may inspire some of you queens to remove the sticks that have been lodged up your a55e5 for so very long. 😉
Masc Pride
@AtticusBennett: …coming from one of this site’s MAIN trolls/spambots. When you’re not creating multiple accounts to help back you up and high-five yourself during any of the countless arguments you pick with other members, you’re spamming the comment section with links to your silly blog that no one but your daddy gives even half a sh!t about. You will be the last person to judge who’s well-adjusted and who isn’t. lol
AtticusBennett
@Masc Pride: i don;t need multiple accounts. i know you do, but that’s because basement-dwellers need to pretend they’re not alone in their misery 😀
Masc Pride
@AtticusBennett: Stop lying. Like no one can tell it’s you when some random new user no one’s ever seen before pops up to reiterate all your exact opinions and tell you what a great gay you are. And then we nevvvvver see this mystery user ever again. You’re so unhinged you can’t see how transparent you are. You’re the most miserable person on here by far, and that’s saying A LOT!
AtticusBennett
@Masc Pride: except, no.
but i can understand how upset you must be that openly gay people don’t need to resort to using multiple fake profiles to whittle away their lives. best of luck. contact your closest LGBT centre and get to a support group, they’ll help you come out.
Bauhaus
@Masc Pride:
I wasn’t being hostile, delicate flower.
The only thing I believe about you (that you’ve written about yourself) is that you don’t plan on marrying. You’re an insufferable blowhard, so you not getting married is credible.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: Why don’t you stop with the constant fem bashing and the bashing of out gay men who are more brave than a coward like you? You really are pathetic. I can see why nobody wants to marry you.
Masc Pride
And now my full fan club is here!
@AtticusBennett: Spare me. I’m sure all this will be in the vlog that you’ll spam the comments with tomorrow.
@Bauhaus: Is this is more of you not being hostile? LOL This is classic you though. Act like you just have an innocent objection, but once you realize all your badgering isn’t changing my mind about anything, you unleash the full bitch you wanted to be (and the full bitch I know you are) from the very start.
@Giancarlo85: Why don’t you stop with all your fem-bashing lies and self-victimization. Especially after all your bisexual bashing and going on about how you hate more masculine guys, you don’t have the right (not that you ever really did). Have you ever been married at all? Do you ever have any thoughts on a topic that don’t have anything to do with criticizing something I’ve said? Hmmmm….
AtticusBennett
@Masc Pride: but you’re not masculine. you’re just an unattractive closeted troll. that doesn’t mean “masc” – it just means you’re a homely troll 😀
kofender
I’m still in awe of being just a couple of weeks away from SCOTUS striking down the remaining bans (and yes, I think the Court is going to do just that). In my own way, I’ve worked hard to get marriage equality to become law (in three states). It wasn’t for me. It’s for the next generation of LGBT people. Personally, I’d love to get married too (and I now live in a state where I could), but I fear it’s too late. I had the best possible partner for 23 years, but he passed away seven years ago from undiagnosed metastatic cancer. Now, at age 61, I fear I’m just too old.
The homophobes and haters (no, I feel no need to be generous toward them) are going to scream bloody murder. The haters like FRC, NOM, and now Franklin Graham (who deserves a special shout-out) as well as all 18 people running for the republican nomination for President are all going to have to find creative ways to say they were for marriage equality all along (fortunately, you can’t erase anything from the Internet). I can’t wait to see their heads explode.
Thanks for running the survey. I’ll be interested in seeing the final results.
Dakotahgeo
@kofender: OOOOOOOooooo, don’t you dare give up, kofender! At 60 years old, I too thought there wasn’t a chance that anyone would be interested in me. i was overweight, average looking, but I had a great personality, smile, and blue eyes, lolol. I met a young man in a MSN group called AGCM (Absolutely Gay Christian Men) and did not even realize he was interested in me! Long story short, he is coming up from Brazil this December and we will hopefully be married in the Christmas season or the New Year! I will be 71 this July and he will be 41 in September! YES, there IS hope for all people, but you have to BE the same person as you’re looking for! Best wishes and I wish we could keep in touch!
kofender
Dakotahgeo, thanks for the kind words and your story. It gives me a glimmer of hope. So, anyone in the market for a slightly used, a bit battered and beaten Jewish old widow man (as the gay matchmaker—yes, there is such a thing—once told me, gay widowers make the best husbands because our prior relationships did not end in acrimony and we know how to make a relationship successful)? If so, I’m available. Operators are standing by…
Dakotahgeo
@kofender: Lolol… NOW you’re talkin’!!! Heh heh heh…”Operators are standing by”… Sweet! 😉 Pastor Dak!
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: LOL. Hypocrite. You’re the one who is doing self-victimization. Ever since you started posting on here with your fake ass username… it’s always been the same story. You’re not masculine and I never bashed bisexuals. You’re just a hypocritical liar in every respect. Nobody will ever be attracted to your ugly ass.
Masc Pride
@AtticusBennett: Says the homely troll that drags his geriatric father around pride festivals to make videos explaining why he’s a better gay than everyone else. 😀
@Giancarlo85: I’ll take that as a no. You don’t have any thoughts unless I’ve said something first. Ever since I started posting here with my “fake ass username”, you’ve hung on to my every word even when I’ve intentionally ignored you; think about what that says about you. Talk about pathetic! No one buys your victim act because we’ve all seen you break character and get very vicious too many times before.
kevininbuffalo
I was married (I’m Bi) and I’ll be damned if I’ll ever give up by freedom again.
kevininbuffalo
Make that my freedom!
Masc Pride
@kevininbuffalo: Amen, brother! Same here. I feel like once you’ve been married, it’s kind of like “been there, done that”. Sort of like skydiving in a way. lol
Merv
I’m not assuming anything about the Supreme Court ruling. They could throw us a curveball that nobody’s expecting. Maybe they’ll say we’re only entitled to civil unions and give states 12 months to enact them. The wingnuts would celebrate that and pretend that that’s what they always supported, even though they’ve fought civil unions almost as hard as marriage.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: You’re a fake and a fraud. You are not someone anyone would want to date because you’re so unpleasant and fraudulent. You’re not masculine. What victim act? You’re the one crying about fake ass masculine men being victimized and bullied. Cry me a river!
Pistolo
I think straight people will think of this as being the cure to homophobia. There are so many who already relish at how much things have changed. Well, there’s something to be said for the positives- it is a more accepting world. But not as accepting as it should be, you still go through things in this world as a gay person.
Masc Pride
@Giancarlo85: Oh and you’re the most pleasant person on this site? You are the epitome of the angry, malicious, vindictive fem sooooooooo many guys wish to steer clear of. Conversing with the likes of you and Atticus has totally made me understand why soooooooooo many guys state “no fems”. I used to think it was a little unnecessary, but your behavior has totally shown me why someone would make a request that you guys stay away. You’re full of DRAMA, and you love it. Talk about undateable!
I’ve never claimed anyone was bullying me. None of you have the power. I said that you guys are just as guilty of the “bashing” you complain about INCESSANTLY. Your victim complex just allows you to feel like it’s okay when you do it but bigoted if anyone does it back to you. Please quote me correctly instead of making up lies in hopes of getting people to agree with you.
Sluggo2007
@Giancarlo85: Not everyone is a flaming queen like you.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: You are the one who is full of drama and hatred. I can see why nobody even dates you at all. I don’t remember who said this but it was so true: So called masculine men, like yourself, aren’t masculine enough for other men. People who say “no gems” are often the most insecure and have a great of internalized homophobia. They don’t like seeing someone who is out. That is why they wouldn’t date us. But I don’t care about these fake masculine men.
You are the biggest liar on here and you have no clue about what you’re talking about.
@Sluggo2007: And not everyone is a brainless idiot like you.
richard s
@MascPride…bitter table for one?
Masc Pride
@Giancarlo85: “I don’t remember who said this but it was so true: So called masculine men, like yourself, aren’t masculine enough for other men.”
YOU said that. lol
Masc Pride
@Sluggo2007: That’s exactly what he always wants to imply so he can pat himself on the back for being one of the few that has the “courage” to be openly RIDICULOUS. He’s really just bitter because other guys are easily far more masculine and therefore far more desired by the very community he’s always claiming is indebted to catty queens such as himself. Same with Atticus. This is why just seeing the word “masc” sends them into a tizzy (but of course they can be as proudly fem as they please).
jwtraveler
They should give this survey to all the homeless LGBT teens sleeping on the streets and prostituting themselves to buy food. I’m sure they’re all THRILLED about being able to get married in a couple of years, if they live that long.
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: I didn’t say that on here. I agree with it though. Funny how you aren’t masculine enough for those who demand masculine men.
@Masc Pride: Lol you live in fantasy. Bitter about what? Some fake ass masculine closeted queens who think they are better than “those gays”? We hear it all the time from you. Fake closeted masculine men are often single and always “looking”. They cannot even get hook UPS. Must be a sad existence being you when even guys on grindr reject your sorry ass.
And I am proud to be androgynous. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am proud to being out, and not a closeted self hater like you who is desired by no one.
Masc Pride
@Giancarlo85: You did say it, and now you’re trying to quote it like it wasn’t you. You are every type of crazy in the book!
“Must be a sad existence being you when even guys on grindr reject your sorry ass.”
I agree. Must be very sad to log into Grindr and see how unwanted you are with profile after profile leading off with “No fems”. IDK maybe you can start with that charismatic line about how they owe all their gay freedoms to bitter queens like you?
You know all the right words for your melodramatic speeches, but your actions are that of someone that TRULY hates himself and everyone he feels has it easier. You’re not proud of anything. You’re full of frustration, envy and hostility. You totally love to argue. How many orgasms have you had since you started this bitchfest? lol
Giancarlo85
@Masc Pride: No, I didn’t say that. I agreed with someone else who did say it. You are the real type of crazy… you’re nasty too. A nasty bitter closet queen who hates himself for being the way he was. You are the type of guy who wishes he was straight so you could be “one of the guys”. You live in fantasy.
Profile after profile leading off with “no fems”… funny how those guys who say that either have fake profiles or aren’t masculine to begin with. You are a nutcase, and you love defending the internalized homophobia of others.
You think I hate myself? How so? I’m not the one living in a closet and living behind a fake shield of “masculinity”. I’m out there, kid. That shows more strength and identity than someone like you. You are just another nobody. What’s the saying? A dime a dozen. I’m very proud of myself, and I carry little envy for someone as pathetic and miserable as you.
Masc Pride
@Giancarlo85: You did say it. It wasn’t someone else, and you know it. I can tell you hate yourself because you’re ALWAYS picking fights with people. Only a truly miserable individual does that. You’re quite sensitive and easily offended, which isn’t very strong at all and totally shows you’re not quite sure of yourself either. Like I said, it’s almost like you have these melodramatic speeches about pride rehearsed, but your actions don’t match up. You’re just a typical miserable queen who wants to drag everyone down in the dumps to suffer alongside you. Sucks to be you!
notevenwrong
Irrelevant to most gay people; despite all the indoctrination by the Sullivan-conservative crowd, most of us know that tying our self-worth to finding a Disney prince to live with happily ever after is bullshit for teenage girls. There are more important issues we could have been spending all these resources on.
kofender
Yes, we should be focusing on ENDA by all means, as well as what’s happening in the trans community. But I must respectfully disagree with your characterization of marriage as a Disney tale. It carries much more meaning for many of us (especially those of us essentially frozen out of marriage at this late stage). Being with someone for many years isn’t about happily ever after; it’s about sharing a life together as a couple. To wit, when my late partner was still alive, we could sit on the couch for hours reading, not saying a word, and be totally comfortable and secure in each other’s presence. Of course we could finish each other’s sentences.
When he died, part of me died as well. That’s not something out of a Disney story. As I stated earlier, it’s too late for me, but it’s the right time for the next generations of LGBT people, and it is for them I’ve dedicated so much time, energy and money to the cause of marriage equality. It is a shame you don’t understand any of this (I think I pity you a little in this regard).
AzLights
@kofender: Hey Kofender! Remember me? Ioan Lightoller over at HuffPost? How you doing? I am very excited about this and literally counting down the days until we all have freedom to marry in this country.
I’m still sending out good thoughts and vibes for you to find a good man to marry. I will keep sending out that positive energy for you.
Also, I agree on the need for ENDA.I would like to see a trans-inclusive ENDA, but I guess we’ll see what we can get through once we throw the Rethugs out.
kofender
Ioan!!! How the heck are you? Doing okay out here in the California desert now. Thanks for the positive thoughts and energy; keep sending it to Palm Springs (after all when 65% of the population is gay there has to be at least ONE man who might be interested). And yes, we need to throw every single republican out of office as soon as possible. Not one left who’s worth spit, so far as I’m concerned. Then we can have a trans-inclusive ENDA (at the very least). Take care of yourself!
lencho
if you’re going to offer that we take a survey on our feelings, don’t make us sign up with someone else to see the results please…
BadSeed
Having the right to marry is important in the same way formal democracy is: it bolsters formal equality but does not guarantee it. Personally I can’t wait until SCOTUS rules for marriage equality. When that happens the gay and bi men of San Francisco can get back to the urgent business of restoring the right to privacy in bathhouses, thereby allowing traditional gay bathhouses to reopen in San Francisco where gay bathhouses have suffered a continuing de facto ban for over 30 years — since 1984 to be precise. Now if that’s not Orwellian, nothing is and yet the LGBT political establishment in Sa Francisco has remained silent on this issue. Throw the rascals out.
hyhybt
@BadSeed: yuck.