Partially good and bad news for gay men fantasizing about being intimate with George Clooney in the future: He can deal with the crow’s feet on your face, but one thing he absolutely cannot deal with are the crow’s feet on your testicles.
In a recent interview with Italy’s Max Magazine, Clooney cracked “I’ve never fixed my eyes, but I spent more money to stretch the skin of my testicles. I did not like the wrinkles.”
The technique, he says, is called “ball ironing,” and “many people in Hollywood have done it.” We demand photos before we believe it.
In other news, a large number of media outlets are now “reporting” that George Clooney, in 10 hours flat, has inspired a ball ironing “craze” across the globe. Just like that time David Beckham inspired men around the globe to elongate their penises.