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Holmes and Cruise Set Wedding Date

katie-holmes-4.jpg
We’ve said it before and we’ll probably say it again: poor Katie Holmes. Not only has she been zombified, used as a womb for Tom Cruise’s miracle baby, but now the date for her nuptials to the looney movie-star has been set.

Mark your calendars, ladies and germs: Ms. Holmes will become Mrs. Katie (Sorry, Kate) Cruise on November 18th in Italy. Dressed in Armani, Holmes will go through the traditional Scientology ceremony of having her brain officially removed and replaced with cotton candy, pebbles, and a severe distaste for reality.

On the plus-side, once the “loving” couples reaches the end of the publicity contract (oh, please, you know it’s true), there’s no doubt Holmes will be a very rich woman.

Of course, she still won’t have a brain…

By:           Andrew Belonksy
On:           Oct 24, 2006
Tagged: , , , ,

  • 1 Comment
    • jono
      jono

      Please leave Katie alone. She’s sensative and all alone in this world without a friend in the world.

      Oct 24, 2006 at 9:40 pm · @ReplyReply to this comment ·

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