On October 6, 1998, Matthew Shepard was tied to a fence post, brutally beaten by two men and left for dead on the outskirts of Laramie, Wyoming. The attack and Matthew’s death six days later would become a milestone in the gay rights movement. The media circus that ensued would inspire an award-winning play, The Laramie Project, TV movies, best selling books and countless news articles. Matthew’s tragic death also ignited an unprecedented conversation in America about gay rights and resulted in groundbreaking new hate crimes legislation.
Michele Josue became close friends with Matthew Shepard in 1993 when they were both enrolled at The American School, a boarding school in Switzerland. With her new documentary, Matt Shepard is a Friend of Mine (now playing in select theaters), Josue shares her memories of Matt and connects with those who knew him best. Matt’s personal journals and home movies reveal a Matthew Shepard that has been largely overshadowed by his symbolic gay martyr status: that of a sensitive and fun-loving friend, son and brother. Josue spoke with Queerty about her film and the happy memories and legacy of her late friend.
Queerty: There have been countless news articles, plays and films written about Matt in the 16 years since his death. Was there something that hadn’t been said about Matt that you needed the world to know with your film?
Michelle Josue: I think what’s exciting and fresh about this project is that it was made by someone who knew him and was close to him. I think the other projects were honorable and wonderful, but they couldn’t capture who Matt was as a human being. That was our primary goal for this film. To share with the world that Matt was an extraordinary, complex and flawed individual who had real struggles.
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How did you convince Matt’s friends and parents to be in the film?
It was just sort of a known thing that one day when I was ready — when we were collectively ready as a group — that we would do this project. We are all over the world because we (Matt’s high school friends) went to an international boarding school. When we came together at reunions it would always come up. Back in 2009 I was at a stopping point in my career, I had just wrapped up working on a project and it seemed like the natural step. Judy had released her book, The Meaning of Matthew, and it seemed like the right time.
The film includes an astonishing amount of Matt’s home movies, journal entries and personal letters that have never been seen or heard. Were they hesitant to share such personal memories?
The fact that they knew me and I was a dear friend of Matt’s helped them to trust me implicitly. The Shepard’s trust in me is one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received. But it was also a very intense sort of obligation. On one of our first filming trips out in Wyoming Judy handed me a shoebox of HI-8 tapes. She hadn’t seen them since… Actually, I don’t think she had ever seen them. They had given away their HI-8 camera so they had no way of playing them. She also took us to their storage unit where they kept a lot of Matt’s belongings and gave us a box full of his letters, journals entries, and pictures. She let us use all of it. They trusted me implicitly throughout the whole process of making the film. They were really hands off and allowed me to have complete creative license with whatever I wanted to do. That was tremendous but also very unnerving.
What is your happiest memory of Matt?
I was his prom date for his senior year dance. I was younger and I think he felt sorry for me. He was so lovely and nice. The prom was just starting, the music was playing and no one was on the dance floor. He ran up to me and took my hand and swept me up onto the dance floor. We did this sort of tango across the floor with everyone awkwardly gawking at us. Matt was so fun-loving and didn’t care what other people thought. He was very silly.
What is the question you get asked most about Matt?
What was he like? No one knows what he was like as a real person. They know him as the victim who was gay and tied to a fence and died because he was gay. Those are the only things that most people know. That’s the number one question I get. I just tell them that he was incredibly generous and kind.
What do you think is the biggest misinformation out there about Matthew?
The overall picture of Matt is of a sort of saintly icon. When people throw out the words, “martyr, saint and icon” you think of an individual who is free of flaws who is perfect. Matt was certainly not perfect and he never pretended to be. I think it’s dangerous to characterize someone as perfect and not human.
There is one story, in particular, that stood out to me in the film. Reggie Fluty, the first officer to respond and find Matthew on Oct. 6, 1998. She freed Matt’s tied hands from the fence and performed mouth to mouth on him in an attempt to keep him alive. What was it like to hear her recount that story?
That was tough. That was probably one of the very first interviews I did for the film. It was the second day we were in Laramie. It was really intense. We spent almost a whole day in her home talking. It was really emotional for her, as well as myself. At the time it was difficult to hear but it also offered me some solace to hear little things I hadn’t heard (before). When she found Matt there was a doe lying there next to him. That has provided me with a lot of solace to know that he wasn’t entirely alone through the night. I had always been so angry and shaken up at the thought of Matt lying there alone for all those hours in the cold. That image haunted me.
You went to Matt’s funeral service in Casper, Wyoming. What was that day like?
It was surreal. I remember when I landed in Casper it was sunny and not very cold at all. However, the next day there was an incredible snowstorm. It was kind of a blessing in disguise because the night before we had been watching the news and saw that The Westboro Baptist Church was going to come down from Topeka, Kansas to protest Matt’s funeral. I was pissed off and scared. But the fact that there was an incredible snowstorm deterred a lot of them from coming. We had to get a ticket to go to the funeral and we all had to be shuffled around to the back entrance of the church to avoid all the craziness, the protesters and counter-protesters outside. There were snipers positioned on the roof. Dennis was wearing a bulletproof vest when he did the press conference right before the funeral.
There are many people out there, most noticeably The Westboro Baptist Church, that didn’t know Matt yet have exploited his death to advance their own agenda. Was there any interest on your part in speaking with them?
Yes, of course. There were those instances where I wanted to talk The Westboro Baptist Church and hear what they had to say. As a filmmaker I was open to capturing as much as a I could but what I really wanted to tell was the story of Matt as a person; a portrait of this person who was just coming of age and was robbed of the chance to become himself. A lot of people wondered why I didn’t talk to Aaron and Russell [McKiney and Henderson, Matt’s killer’s]. My team and I talked about that at length and ultimately we decided that if it didn’t add narratively to who Matt was as a person than we had to let it go. There is nothing that Aaron or Russell or any of the Phelps clan can tell me about whom Matt really was.
While talking with Matt’s mother Judy you refer to Matt as “adventurous.” Judy replies, “no fear.” In another scene Matt’s friend talks about how Matt’s innocence and belief in the goodness of people were qualities that made him an incredible person, yet also made him an easy target. What do you think Matt was thinking that night he got into the truck with Aaron McKiney and Russell Henderson?
I remember when it happened. I thought to myself, Why did he get in that truck? But, it was just so Matt. He was so friendly and so trusting. I also think because he had gone through such trauma in Morocco (Matt was beaten and raped in February 1995, during a high school trip to Morocco.) that even if he was feeling scared or not trusting of a certain situation or people he would do his best to overcompensate. I’ve been to Laramie several times and having visited The Fireside [The bar where Matt met McKinney and Henderson] and being in that town you would never think anything like that could ever happen. It’s such a quaint, college town.
There is a scene where you are speaking with the Father Roger Schmit, the priest who counseled Aaron McKiney. He says, “There is more to Russell and Aaron than what happened that night. Matthew is our brother, but so are Aaron and Russell.” That greatly upset you. You say, “ I just don’t want to think of them as real people” and you hope at some point you can stop being mad. Have you stopped?
No, and I think that’s part of the message of the film and why I put that conversation in. It was really transformative for me. I felt for many, many years a bit ashamed of the anger I still carried inside, the fact that I was still grieving 10, 12, 16 years later. I think in our country there is a cultural attitude that we can overcome any tragedy, any difficulty in life. But in reality, dealing with things that are so terrible and so unjust… it’s just not possible. It took me many years and that conversation to know that it’s OK for me to still be mad and we should all embrace that kind of emotion and outrage. The Shepard’s have done that and used it for good.
Do you think that Matt’s family is still angry?
I think so. When you talk to Dennis, he is really mad. Still. It was probably most difficult for him to reach the point where they could forgo the death penalty [for McKinney and Henderson]. However, Judy was always able to see them as human beings with unfortunate family lives who were products of a society that taught it was OK to hate. It’s kind of a marvel and inspiring that Judy is able to see them in that way.
What do you see as Matt’s legacy?
Matt had gone though a lot. He was at a stage in his life where he was making all the right decisions. He was on the right path. He was going back to school. He was open and accepting and proud of who he was and that had been a long struggle for him. So, I think a lot of his legacy is inspiring people to live an authentic, open life with courage. I also think a large part of his legacy is the work that Judy and Dennis do in his name. I think the work that they do to erase hate is a large part of what Matt’s legacy is.
Watch the trailer for the film below.
Heath Daniels is a writer, producer and filmmaker.
Mikah
This is going to be a great tribute,and it’s going to create more awareness on the very real issue of Gay bashing.Most people are still blind to the sad fact that LGBT people are still the number one target for hate crimes in America.
1EqualityUSA
The people who hurt us must not see us as human beings, brothers and sisters. The doe staying nearby intrigued me. That is something that will stay in my memory banks for a long time. Thank you for revisiting this time and being such a good friend of his.
Ron Jackson
It still makes me cry to envision poor little Matt tied to that fence.
jockjack5
This boys death was tragic and I’m glad that this film celebrates his life and all the good things associated with it.
But…
There is not one mention here of a single word: “Meth”
“In September 2013, The Book of Matt: Hidden Truths About the Murder of Matthew Shepard by gay writer Stephen Jimenez, the producer of the 2004 20/20 segment, was published. The book revived and expanded upon Jimenez’s claims that Shepard’s murder was at least partly drug-related, specifically to Shepard’s being a “major” methamphetamine dealer, and that, contrary to the previously generally accepted version of events, his sexual orientation was not a major motive for the crime.” – Wikipedia.
I just think Queerty should have mentioned something about this “controversy”, if for no other reason than doing due diligence as a quasi-journalistic enterprise.
Just sayin’
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
@jockjack5:
The whole premise of that “account” of Matt being a “major meth dealer” was “based upon” a single comment made in a Sheriff’s report that was debunked and proven false. The author claims to be Gay, yet published a book of baseless lies about a kid that was tortured and beaten to death. Queerty deserves kudos for not tarnishing their site by making any mention of that vile, abhorrent, noxioux smcubags attempt to cash in on a horrific tragedy…….
The most gut wrenching, rip your heart right out of your chest thing I can ever recall was an interview with the first nurse in the ER who tended to Matt when his brutally beaten barely cling to life broken body was brought into the ER. She said that his whole face was covered in dried blood and caked mud from the severe beating he suffered at the hands of those two vile smcubags. The only flesh visible on Matt’s face was from the trail of tears that had run down his face…………..
1EqualityUSA
Meth or no meth, he didn’t deserve this.
Ron Jackson
@jockjack5: I knew someone was going to bring Jimenez’s book up. Never fails. Jimenez is an attention grabbing fame whore with an ego the size of Texas. Just because he’s gay doesn’t give him a pass. His book is unsubstantiated rumor and innuendo. He wrote it because controversy sells and the right wing nutjobs ate it up.
I don’t agree with you that it even needed to be brought up in the context of this film. So STFU.
Cam
@jockjack5:
I was wondering when somebody would come in here and parrot the false and debunked claim that the right wing trolls have been trying to repeat since the event first happened.
The right wing bigots were TERRIFIED that anti-gay bigotry would be so exposed and of course, if somebody is gay, they are evil and NEVER a victim because being gay is itself something that is deserving of being attacked according to them.
I’m not surprised that people keep trying to bring this phony info up, but I”m curious JockJack5. What was YOUR motivation? You seem VERY adamant that that fake info should have been brought up. Are you just another right wing anti-gay bigot troll on here, or simply misinformed? And if you are simply misinformed, then why would you push so strongly about this fake info?
DarkZephyr
@jockjack5: I KNEW there was going to be a “that guy” making this kind of comment under this article, and you decided that it needed to be you. Congratulations, jerk. But I suppose a couple more “that guys” might show up to back you up before the commenting is done on this article.
jockjack5
To one and all.
It was never my intent to tarnish the dead image of Saint Matthew.
Verily, verily I say unto you… that I am neither right-wing or particularly bigoted at the abhorrent death of this young man.
It was an unspeakably ugly and horrific crime and the gay guy that killed Matthew should rot in prison, where I believe he is serving a life-term.
I do, however, feel that Queerty could have taken the opportunity to at least de-bunk some of the falsehoods which, apparently, exist within the narrative advanced by Mr. Jimenez.
Maybe this was not the forum, or the time and place, to do that though.
Some of the hysterical reactions of some of you though are almost comical and indicative of the knee-jerk mentality deeply imbedded in our community if we EVER dare question the “party line” with respect certain gay icons.
Peace be with you today…
Ron Jackson
@jockjack5: Sooo… where to begin? You defend yourself by using a right wing slur of Matt calling him “Saint Matthew”.
Then you prattle on and espouse the allegation that one of his murderers is gay. That’s one of the things that Jimenez postulated but that is not backed up by any facts.
And then you commit the ultimate sin and use the phrase “verily, verily I say unto you” To me that’s a dead giveaway that you’re just another bigoted or closets self hating troll. Go stand in the corner for an hour.
jockjack5
@Ron Jackson:
Oh my.
I can almost see the spittle flying out of your mouth Mr. Jackson.
Where does your rage come from?
I don’t hate myself or anyone else.
Now, I would like you to write on the black-board 100 times…
“I will get a grip”
And then take a Valium and try and get some rest.
onthemark
I never heard the claim before, but tiny little Matt – what was he, 5’3″? – seems a verrrry unlikely meth dealer (either “major” or minor).
PLAYS WELL WITH OTHERS
@jockjack5:
You Stated:
“I do, however, feel that Queerty could have taken the opportunity to at least de-bunk some of the falsehoods which, apparently, exist within the narrative advanced by Mr. Jimenez”
It took me about 3 seconds to “de-bunk some of the falsehoods” Maybe you are new to this internets thingy, in that case I have done a bit of “de-bunking” for you:
http://mediamatters.org/blog/2013/10/02/debunking-stephen-jimenezs-effort-to-de-gay-mat/196229
That above is called a link, you put your mouse over the above and left click and like magic a page appears which 100% de-bunks the vile, abhorrent garbage that fat, ugly pig Jimenez put in his vile book of lies………..
1EqualityUSA
JockJack5, This wasn’t one of your finest days. The sarcasm takes away from this young man’s story. Let’s just call it a day and think of the suffering that this kid went through before he died. His friend did a beautiful thing for him. The doe that stayed by his side throughout his trial was so neat.
AtticusBennett
the doc is wonderful, and utterly heartbreaking. i attended a screening of it months ago with the Shepard family in attendance, and got to speak with them afterward.
in our conversations, i mentioned that the protests after Matthew’s death were really the “introduction”, so to speak, for the Westboro Baptists into the public consciousness – most people had never heard of them before. and yet, as the Shepards said, as awful as the WBC are, they’re not the real enemy. The republican party is. Whether it’s Virginia Foxx insisting that Matthew’s death was not a hate-crime and it being labeled as one is a “hoax” – or that HACK faux-journalist folks have mentioned who for not intelligent reason has devoted years to a debunked LIE about Shephard…. they said one of the biggest hurts has been the way the Conservatives in America have been killing their son all over again – using his death, denigrating it, dismissing it, demeaning it, for their own bigoted anti-gay ideals.
Tracy Pope
@jockjack5: There is no good reason to include (now debunked) information in this article because this article is about the people that actually knew Matthew Shepard and the film they produced.
jockjack5
@1EqualityUSA:
I agree.
Also agree with Tracy Pope comment.
RIP sweet Matthew.
Fang
Thanks to everyone who posted criticisms of Jimenez’s work. I read about his book when it first came out and never read any follow-ups about it, so that was all very informative. Let’s try to keep civil, though. Trolls aside, kindly informing those whom have been misinformed speaks more strongly than vitriol.
Charlie in Charge
Looks like a very moving film, will look forward to watching it. I was a senior in high school when he was murdered and I kept the newspapers clippings and magazine articles in a binder with me all year, I haven’t thought about that in forever.
Tackle
Was Matthew a dealer and user, none of us on here really knows. And as far as I know, none of his family or friends have never denied he was. But lets stop pretending that these accusations about drugs started with Jiimenez and his book. These stories started circulating yrs and yrs before Jimenez came out with his book.
And hypothetically speaking, if Matthew was, either or both, he did NOT deserve that. No one does… If Matthew was a drug dealer in meth, as well as a user, ( if that were the fact) then I don’t think it’s wrong to include this in his narrative. Such information can be used ti show and warn of the dangers of drug use, and the unsavory people it can bring into your life. What I strongly disagree with, is sensationally driven stores, that are mean spirited, and vindictive.
And Matt looking down on us would most likely want his TRUE story told. Whatever it is. Drug dealer/user/ or not, for me, it doesn’t take away or add anything to Matthew’s life or legacy.
But what makes me more angry than Jimenez’s book, and probably something Matthew himself would not like: since in hear and heard he was a very fair minded, and hated injustices, are these posters with their selective empathy & and sympathy. That’s only reserved for the young, cute and White. I’m sure a lot of denials will go up. But if this same thing had happened to an, elderly, Black, Asian, Lesbian, Trans, non- White Haspanic or not so cute LGBTQ person, half these posters would not have even posted. One thing that we all can use from Matthew’s terrible murder, is to check ourselves and keep ourselves in check to make sure our empathy & sympath is eevenly given out. May you rest in peace Matthew, and. James. And ALL the other victims of hate crimes…
loren_1955
I remember well the day Matthew Shepard was discovered and taken to the hospital. Hit the news. At that time I was not out, was married with three boys working in a very conservative place. There were all kinds of comments like, ‘Good, one less faggot in this world’. My heart was so touched with the travesty, I shed tears at my desk. Alone I followed the news, donations were being gathered to help him, I was going to donate, then the word came that he died. I had no one to talk to, to share my feelings of loss of a good man that I didn’t even know, just knowing no one deserved to die like that beaten and alone. The new film is exciting to see a real side of the man. Bless you, Michele, for making the project happen.
Clark35
@1EqualityUSA: Very true.
Jacob23
I sort of agree with both sides in the comments above. The Jimenez book is a sleazy hit job. When I got a copy (from the library) the first thing I did was go through it to see what his sources were. There isn’t a single footnote or endnote in the whole book. There are no documents reproduced and included in an appendix. There’s nothing. It is a wild tale attributed to a couple of anonymous sources. No other journalist could go to Laramie and confirm what Jimenez reported. The Media Matters link provided above by PlaysWellWithOthers covers a lot of the holes in the book.
That having been said, the book was a major development in the public’s perception of Shepard. It was promoted all over the country, and heavily promoted on Christian radio. As a result of the book and of the Elizabeth Vargas piece on 20/20 (which Jimenez produced), the biggest misconception about Shepard is not that he was a saint, but rather that he was a drug dealer. For Queerty to have a close personal friend of Matt – someone who could directly refute the allegations based on her personal knowledge – on hand for an interview, and then not ask the question, is a total fail. And I would say it also was a total fail by the Shepard Foundation to refuse to respond to the charges back in 2013. Not responding doesn’t make the smears go away; it bolsters them in the public mind.
The best evidence is that Matt was an ordinary college kid who was living his life. Not a “saint” but a young man with various flaws and issues. Then some weirdly obsessed clown comes along and claims that Matt was actually some sort of meth kingpin. The obsessed clown is gay, so he can’t be accused of homophobia and he is a journalist who has won some awards, so he can’t be written off as a nut. Instead of remaining silent and changing the subject, all of his family and friends, including Ms. Josue, should have lined up to say: “This book is a pack of lies. We knew Matt personally and interacted with him every day and talked with him about his life. This book has as much to with reality as Harry Potter.” Hopefully, the documentary will do a better job of pushing back against the smears.
sejjo
@Jacob23: “For Queerty to have a close personal friend of Matt – someone who could directly refute the allegations based on her personal knowledge – on hand for an interview, and then not ask the question, is a total fail.”
The interview is not an investigative journalism piece. The interviewer showed taste and restraint in not asking the clearly provocative and controvery-seeking question. He’ll leave that to the tabloid mags you probably love.
Queer4Life
WTF. Seriously. I am so sick of the Matthew Shepard band wagon. Drug deal gone wrong. The whole “Hate Crime” was nothing but BS. Stop perpetuating this lie already.
Tackle
@Jacob23: You bring up some good points. As I said, drug user or dealer, he did not deserve that. But if he wasn’t, why don’t family and close friends just come out and say he wasn’t. Or they, could even say, I have never witness Matthew do an illegal substance. It seems the only ones defending Matthew, are people who don’t know/didn’t know Matthew. So I do agree that it’s a major fail for those closes to him to not address this topic. If drugs were apart of Matthew’s life, would it be so hard just to admit it? At this point, over 15+ later, I don’t think it would make a difference?
But I think the Matthew Shepard foundation would be afraid of funding drying up, since it so heavily, relies on donations.
debousque
@Queer4Life:Queer4Life: you are a dirt bag, this kid was murdered in a horrific way, if you are so sick of hearing about it, stay off the f’ing site!
Cam
@Queer4Life: said….”WTF. Seriously. I am so sick of the Matthew Shepard band wagon. Drug deal gone wrong. The whole “Hate Crime” was nothing but BS. Stop perpetuating this lie already.”
________________________________________________
Nice try right wing troll. Your name was a dead giveaway. No “Queer” person would have made the comment when credible information has debunked the claims, and no “Queer” person would have been as angrily adamant about it under those circumstances.
I get that you right wingers are used to just lying about topics over and over and hoping that it sticks, but it doesn’t work on here, you are WAAAAAAAYYYYYY too easy to spot.
But nice try. Just a hint, go back and look at the old posts from when Prop 8 was an issue, the Mormon trolls were a little better at this than you.
Cam
@Tackle: said… “You bring up some good points. As I said, drug user or dealer, he did not deserve that. But if he wasn’t, why don’t family and close friends just come out and say he wasn’t. ”
Yes, because major media and the police chief in Laramie debunking the story publicly weren’t enough?
Tackle
@Cam: Actually no that’s not enough. Because the major media and the police chief did not debunk drug use. What they claim is to have no proff that his murder was drug related. Two entirely different scenarios…
Jeanie
I wept when I heard about this on the news it was such a senseless act but however you look at it his short life brought about some much needed awareness to this country. Elton John in the song American Triangle didn’t think the “land of the brave” applied to the United States. I feel he is wrong and that Matthew was a brave soul indeed everyday of his life. Not perfect, but no one is. He most definitely was not alone on the windswept prairie of Wyoming. I believe the Lord above sent the Doe to watch over Matthew until he was found. I pray Matthew knew she was there and drew some solace from that. Matthew won’t ever be forgotten! The young man with the million dollar smile – how he enriched his family – how wealthy they must have felt to have this special young man as their son! My prayers are still with them.